New Year Relationship Rescue: Spicing Things Up In 2009

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By mia bolaris-forget

Now that you’re done kisses or, at least, exchanging a kiss under the mistletoe and have rung in the New Year, it’s time to get started on all those new year’s resolutions; and that likely means getting into shape, both physically, emotionally and romantically. In fact, all three go pretty much hand-in-hand. If you have a positive outlook, you’ll likely be more motivated to take better care of yourself and the better you look and feel, the better you’ll feel about your relationship and more apt you’ll be to take better care of you mate.

Take the “me” out of “team”: My husband always says there’s no “I” in team, to which I respond that (if you switch the letters around) there is a “me” (in team). Still, a happy union has no “I” or “me”, but instead a “we”. And, its up to both of you to make the “we” your FIRST priority.

Put the relate back in relationship: Work on spending time together as a couple and as a family and NOT just doing your daily “thing”. Remember having a relationship, a healthy one, at least, means relating.

Change you priority list: Recent research reveals that intimacy and sex are good for both your emotional and physical health so, it’s best to bump it up on your priority list and move a few other “must dos” down a few.

Date more: Yes, even married couples need to “date” (one another that is). Set aside time to go out for dinner, a movie or to just do something you both enjoy or use to do. Even couples who’ve been in a relationship for a long time need to break out of the homebody rut. And, don’t forget to dress up and get dolled up for a truly romantic experience.

Accentuate the positives: No one is perfect, not even you. So, stop obsessing over your partners imperfections and find things that attracted you to him or her in the first place and focus on those instead.

Make yourself a priority: If you ignore (all) your wants and needs, you won’t be able to willingly or joyfully give to someone else. Take time for yourself so you’ll want to make more time for your partner.

Stop sweating the small stuff: Sure it’s stuff that you want and “may” still need to be changed, but it shouldn’t change how you see your partner or how you view your relationship. Take note of things you don’t like, bring them up lovingly, set the example and move on to more positive things.

Never put off for tomorrow what you can do today Let your partner know just how you feel at the moment, especially when it comes to expressing love. And, you should take time to show your mate your love and appreciation every day, even if it’s in small ways. Remember, if you nurture your partner and your relationship you are also doing yourself a world of good.

Let go of the past: Whatever you’re harboring from the year before or arguments from the past, learn to let them go. Learn what you can and move on.