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Marriage Can Be Scary: A Look At The Reality Of Marriage And The Potential Anxiety and Panic It Can Cause

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By Mia Bolaris-Forget

We are all no doubt familiar with certain life stresses and anxieties, but rarely do the hinder our daily life, progress or ability to function. Still, for others, (especially for brides or new wives and may moms) emotion is a very powerful emotion, and can reveal themselves in a variety of psychological pressures.

For some individuals, managing stress, is just one of those obligations in life, for others, dealing with extreme change may trigger certain uncertainties, fears and vulnerabilities. The individual may begin to question his or her ability to meet his or her new role and responsibilities, and fear failure or incompetence. Issues of maturity and mortality may also infiltrate one’s thought process as they begin to focus on all the negatives associated with a new “independence”, progress, promotion and a new life. Often this stress leads to hypersensitivity, and increased heart rate, sweating, exaggerated thoughts of doom and destruction further emphasizing the person’s inhibitions and fears, and are typically classified as panic attacks. And, experts note that the more the person focuses on the experience and consciously overcoming it or ways of avoiding it, the more they contribute to nurturing it.

Panic attacks can strike at almost any age, under extreme stress and transitional circumstances, and are a direct result of loss of confidence. While most experience panic attacks during the day, others experience symptoms in the middle of the night while asleep. Experts note that such nocturnal disturbances are either caused by panic disorder or classified as “night-terrors”, and take place during non-REM sleep and therefore can not be attributed as responses to dreams or nightmares, but as separate and distinct “attacks” Furthermore experts note that “night-terrors” generally occur about a half hour to three and a half hours into your sleep cycle and are more often than not less severe than daytime panic episodes. They also suggest that those who experience “night-terrors” generally don’t remember the “disturbing” experience and have little difficulty (if awakened) falling back to sleep. Additionally, they point out that such attacks may cause individuals to become physically active during the experience, which may include, kicking, screaming loudly, running out of the bedroom, etc, and are known to cause insomnia; wherein the person maintains a distinct memory of the panic, and while he or she does get physically aggressive, remains physically “frenzied” after the occurrence.

While professionals point out that panic disorder and panic attacks are a very real symptomatic condition, that most of us experience on some level and to some degree at some point in our lives, they also note that they ARE brought about primarily by excess stress and our (inability) to appropriately deal with it. It is in fact, according to experts one of the most increasingly common psychological “problems”.

The good news is that panic IS treatable, especially if you are willing to confront the underlying issues and work toward improving your perception, expectations, and behavioral responses. Experts note, that while there are a variety of medications to help anxious individuals “get a grip”, they also suggest other regimens including a combination of behavioral and cognitive therapy, as well as the ability and willingness to find and join a support group or simply open up and talk about it with friends and family. You may also want to examine your diet and make sure you are getting enough of the proper essential nutrients and also consider cutting out other dietary “staples” such at tea, coffee or chocolate, all which contain caffeine and may contribute to over stimulating your nerves and senses.

Cognitive-behavior therapy is geared toward helping “suffers” understand their emotional “weaknesses” and triggers and modify the way the individual “understands” certain situations and how they respond to it. And, often the individual is gradually placed in the “feared” or anxiety-causing situation allowing them to face it more productively and giving them the opportunity to learn how to cope and understand that they CAN (effectively) do so.

They implicate that marriage may simply be one of those major emotional transitions that undoubtedly “forces” you to take a closer look at yourself and your life and really (perhaps for the first time) define what YOU (and your life) are all about….and that along with adjusting to your partner, your new responsibilities and lifestyle can be overwhelming, even if you’re ecstatic and eagerly looking forward to it all. In fact, they note, the overload to your nervous system, builds up over time, and may be something you haven’t realized and didn’t know about (until you experienced it). Keep in mind that statistics show that many post marital panic attacks are part of a perceived poor-quality marital union. Consider that perhaps you (both) may have been expecting too much from married life and from each other. Focus on re-evaluating your relationship and expectations, making them more realistic and attainable and by all means don’t hesitate to confide in or work with someone who can help you feel good about your spouse and your marriage and help build your confidence once again.

Long Island Home & Lifestyle Articles > Marriage Can Be Scary: A Look At The Reality Of Marriage And The Potential Anxiety and Panic It Can Cause

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