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Chatham-Chick
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Member since 5/05 10311 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
Posted by Goobster
I personally never expect anything to be any different than any other day. And therefore I am never disappointed. I am sorry you had a bad day.
Same, and like the above poster, sorry to hear the OP had a rough day overall.
We hosted our moms/families Saturday evening (which meant cooking & cleaning.) On Sunday my DH put me to work around the house basically from dawn to dusk. 
Message edited 5/13/2013 8:31:39 PM.
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Posted 5/13/13 8:29 PM  |
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butterfly20
Party of 5 - 2015
Member since 4/06 7390 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
it was my 5th mothers day ... and the best...
I've had 4 years where there has been some explosion or disapointment from my family...
This year I finally accepted the distance with my family, booked something for just my immediate family, and saw dh's relatives for the dinner meal. I ordered my own gift so I'd get what I wanted, and the kids came home with cute homemade gifts from daycare.
I'm sorry you had a disappointing day.... eventually you stand up for what you want, and change your expectations of other people.
Message edited 5/13/2013 8:39:08 PM.
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| Posted 5/13/13 8:36 PM |
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BeachMom
Love my 4 kiddos!
Member since 11/08 8346 total posts
Name:
Kristie
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
Yup, every year it's the same thing. The days leading up to DH gets all pissy because it's mother's day and I usually see my mother at some point in the day. I always offer to see his mother also but she's usually busy and we see her on another day. I always feel he tries more for his mother than for me, so it usually winds up in a big argument before hand and mother's day is just another one of the ruined "holidays" because of his family issues and drama from his mom and sister...
This year I told him early on to get over it, and I was glad to see that his mom was finally out enjoying herself for mother's day instead of getting in the middle of the fueding siblings in his family.
But for me, it was just disappointing since I was the one up with the baby while he was sleeping and yelling at the kids to be quiet because he was still sleeping in the am. I would have liked to just have a little peace and quiet in the morning, that's all I ask for.
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| Posted 5/13/13 8:38 PM |
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MrsS2005
Mom of 3
Member since 11/05 13118 total posts
Name:
B
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
DH did a really good job, but dealing with a puking 4 year old meant my Mother's Day was not exactly what I pictured. I'm sorry you didn't have a good day. 
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| Posted 5/14/13 8:16 AM |
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gina409
TWINS!
Member since 12/09 27635 total posts
Name:
g
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
I spent my first Mother's Day in the urgent care center with our twins
They had the stomach virus and it was just not being kind to them and we were worried about dehydration
So the 24 hrs before and all day Mother's Day we spent cleaning up poop and puke lol
At least it was one we will remember lol
I am sorry u did not have the mother' s day you wanted
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| Posted 5/14/13 9:54 AM |
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AllyMally
LIF Adolescent
Member since 1/13 881 total posts
Name:
Alyson
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anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
I know some of you are upset and hurt, but would you really not do as much for your DH for Father's Day? I don't understand that.
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| Posted 5/14/13 11:36 AM |
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Noem1881
LIF Infant
Member since 11/10 90 total posts
Name:
Noemi
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
i should do this!
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| Posted 5/14/13 12:18 PM |
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WorkinMom324
LIF Infant
Member since 7/10 171 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
so, this has been my 6th Mother's day, and, honestly, most of them sucked. This year was different because it was the first one as a mother of two - so, for some strange reason, I had some slightly high expectations. But, I was grossly disappointed! So, here is what I decided:
#1: Mother's Day will not be "fun" or "relaxing" until the kids are older and they can actually plan and do things for you...
#2: However, until then, next year, I AM celebrating, with my kids - the husband is not invited. Obviously he does not want to celebrate based on his actions for the past 6 years, so next year he is not invited!
THERE!
Next year will be a fabulous Mother's Day! I can't wait!
Message edited 5/14/2013 3:00:16 PM.
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| Posted 5/14/13 2:59 PM |
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ThreeforTea
Girls just want to have fun..
Member since 5/12 7482 total posts
Name:
Mama
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
Posted by WorkinMom324
#2: However, until then, next year, I AM celebrating, with my kids - the husband is not invited. Obviously he does not want to celebrate based on his actions for the past 6 years, so next year he is not invited!
THERE!
Next year will be a fabulous Mother's Day! I can't wait!
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| Posted 5/14/13 3:07 PM |
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Katareen
5,000 Posts!
Member since 4/10 7179 total posts
Name:
Katherine
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
Posted by AllyMally
I know some of you are upset and hurt, but would you really not do as much for your DH for Father's Day? I don't understand that.
Why don't you understand? I think it is completely normal to not go out of your way for someone who doesn't go out of their way for you.
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| Posted 5/14/13 3:18 PM |
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WannaBeAMom11
LIF Adult
Member since 1/11 7391 total posts
Name:
Name
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
Posted by Katareen
Posted by AllyMally
I know some of you are upset and hurt, but would you really not do as much for your DH for Father's Day? I don't understand that.
Why don't you understand? I think it is completely normal to not go out of your way for someone who doesn't go out of their way for you.
If Dh can't go out of his way to make Mother's Day special there is no reason to try and make Father's Day special
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| Posted 5/14/13 3:35 PM |
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AllyMally
LIF Adolescent
Member since 1/13 881 total posts
Name:
Alyson
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
Posted by WannaBeAMom11
Posted by Katareen
Posted by AllyMally
I know some of you are upset and hurt, but would you really not do as much for your DH for Father's Day? I don't understand that.
Why don't you understand? I think it is completely normal to not go out of your way for someone who doesn't go out of their way for you.
If Dh can't go out of his way to make Mother's Day special there is no reason to try and make Father's Day special
I do Father's Day for him because that's the kind of person I am. I would like to think I wouldn't hold something against him. I mean I understand you guys were all disappointed and had rough days, but I never thought of it being a tit for tat thing. That's who they are not you.
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| Posted 5/14/13 3:39 PM |
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Katareen
5,000 Posts!
Member since 4/10 7179 total posts
Name:
Katherine
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
Posted by AllyMally
Posted by WannaBeAMom11
Posted by Katareen
Posted by AllyMally
I know some of you are upset and hurt, but would you really not do as much for your DH for Father's Day? I don't understand that.
Why don't you understand? I think it is completely normal to not go out of your way for someone who doesn't go out of their way for you.
If Dh can't go out of his way to make Mother's Day special there is no reason to try and make Father's Day special
I do Father's Day for him because that's the kind of person I am. I would like to think I wouldn't hold something against him. I mean I understand you guys were all disappointed and had rough days, but I never thought of it being a tit for tat thing. That's who they are not you.
Clearly you don't know me at all then 
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| Posted 5/14/13 4:39 PM |
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butterfly20
Party of 5 - 2015
Member since 4/06 7390 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
Posted by AllyMally
Posted by WannaBeAMom11
Posted by Katareen
Posted by AllyMally
I know some of you are upset and hurt, but would you really not do as much for your DH for Father's Day? I don't understand that.
Why don't you understand? I think it is completely normal to not go out of your way for someone who doesn't go out of their way for you.
If Dh can't go out of his way to make Mother's Day special there is no reason to try and make Father's Day special
I do Father's Day for him because that's the kind of person I am. I would like to think I wouldn't hold something against him. I mean I understand you guys were all disappointed and had rough days, but I never thought of it being a tit for tat thing. That's who they are not you.
exactly... and thats what a therapist would say too, to do the nice thing... don't make your love conditional.
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| Posted 5/14/13 7:54 PM |
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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
Posted by butterfly20
Posted by AllyMally
Posted by WannaBeAMom11
Posted by Katareen
Posted by AllyMally
I know some of you are upset and hurt, but would you really not do as much for your DH for Father's Day? I don't understand that.
Why don't you understand? I think it is completely normal to not go out of your way for someone who doesn't go out of their way for you.
If Dh can't go out of his way to make Mother's Day special there is no reason to try and make Father's Day special
I do Father's Day for him because that's the kind of person I am. I would like to think I wouldn't hold something against him. I mean I understand you guys were all disappointed and had rough days, but I never thought of it being a tit for tat thing. That's who they are not you.
exactly... and thats what a therapist would say too, to do the nice thing... don't make your love conditional.
I don't agree with that...honestly if DH made my mothers day crappy I would NOT go out of my way for fathers day!
Seriously, I don't think its hard to remember your wife and all she does. A card, flowers and simply getting up with the kids and letting mom sleep in isn't hard to do and shows that he cares.
I feel terrible reading how some DH's don't do a thing or don't even wake up with the kids. It's the LEAST they should be doing. Why should they have special fathers day when they can't do a thing for mothers day?
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| Posted 5/14/13 9:48 PM |
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FergieK
Loving my girls
Member since 7/09 2533 total posts
Name:
Fergie
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
Mine to was not what I expected. DH asked what I wanted and I know now that I have to tell him. He is not good with firsts of anything. I got a card and workout clothes. SWEAT PANTS!! Not what I was expecting or happy about. So besides that my mother ranted about how she wanted her day like how she wanted it and forgot it was my first mother's day. I was sick On top of it. I guess it was Ok I just learned a lesson to speak up and stay home just the three of us. Drama free
P's I returned the sweats and got some nice clothes to make me feel good
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| Posted 5/14/13 11:22 PM |
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FirstMate
My lil cowboy
Member since 10/10 7789 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
After DH screwing up last year (not mother's day, I think it was Christmas), I FREAKED out. I made it very clear what my expectations are. I have not been disappointed since. However, this year I did remind him that I was sleeping in and that I did not want to see or hear my DS until I was good and ready to get my ass out of bed.
My point is, real life is not a chick flick with the hot guy just knowing what to do. The content of this whole thread is real life. Men need to be told. They need direction and concrete ideas. Don't be shy, spell it out, set your expectations (and what the hell? Set them high! You deserve it!) and then you mitigate the risk of having a repeat of this next year.
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| Posted 5/15/13 12:26 AM |
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orchid24
PARTY OF FIVE PLEASE!
Member since 3/06 2018 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
Posted by Saphire01
I think it will be really great when your child can make you presents and actually celebrate you. Relying on a dh will always disappoint.
seriously. i think men are missing some gene or something...
i made my own reservations at the rainforest cafe (lol) got my kids a little souvenir there. then we all went for a car wash (lol again) and later dh's parents stopped by. (i had gotten dh's mom a card and small bouquet of flowers.)
my kids made me cards and presents. it was a low key day, but truly enjoyed just spending time with my family.
dh never buys anything for me. he knows if i want something badly, i'll buy it for myself 
sorry you were disappointed. i know how you feel but my attitude has changed after 7 yrs. of marriage.
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| Posted 5/15/13 3:50 AM |
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
We had a quiet Mother's Day. But it was nice. After having Mother's Day disappointment a few years ago, I realized that really, the day is about me being a mom. So I have realized that while the royal treatment would be nice, most men are just not wired to think that way.
A school psychologist I work with, a new dad, told me how disappointed his wife was on Mother's Day. It was sad because he really was planning on making it nice for her. He said that he has ANOTHER day where he's gonna screw it up and disappoint her. It was said as a joke, but it was sad.
Now.... I buy my own gift. I tell DH something that I want but don't feel like buying for myself (this year a caboodle for my makeup!). I bought a living social deal for a place I wanted to check out. DH never wants to go to the dog park with me, so I made him go. That was it.
DS is now 6.... And he was SO excited about Mother's Day! He was the one who planned breakfast in bed, and gave me a stack of pictures and cards he made at school and on his own. When that starts to happen, there is no way you can be disappointed. It's not about anything else, really!
I even bought HIM a gift. He's the reason I'm a mom, after al!!!
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| Posted 5/15/13 1:58 PM |
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Re: anyone else have a disappointing mothers day?
Posted by AllyMally
I know some of you are upset and hurt, but would you really not do as much for your DH for Father's Day? I don't understand that.
I agree. I still try to do what I feel is the right thing. After all, it also communicates something to your kids. I would rather my son see nice things being done than spiteful things. They'll notice and remember!
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| Posted 5/15/13 2:04 PM |
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