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Potty training a stubborn 3 yr old

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EricaAlt
LIF Adult

Member since 7/08

22665 total posts

Name:
Erica

Potty training a stubborn 3 yr old

How do I do that? With his sensory issues and sensitivities he's not good with change. Doesn't freak out on others, but usually more with me when he gets frustrated.
He turned 3 in May. Shows absolutely no signs he's ready. He will sit in pee for hours. Even if his pants are wet.
Any advise!!
Thanks

Posted 9/7/12 12:54 PM
 

adeline27
LIF Adult

Member since 5/06

3121 total posts

Name:
Angela

Re: Potty training a stubborn 3 yr old

I first started with DVDs cartoon potty training and a cute potty training book. I know Elmo has a potty DVD. I also started by having him watch his older brother go. Then moved to getting him on the potty as soon as he woke up, after a meal, before bath and bedtime. Now Im working on a time schedule of every hour maybe 1/2 hour. I'm lucky the school will be helping as well. I also took advantage of the summer time and let him go loose outside just to feel what it was like without a diaper. If there is something he really loves use it to get him to at least sit on the potty. Good luck!

Posted 9/7/12 1:41 PM
 

Domino
Always My Miracle

Member since 9/05

9922 total posts

Name:

Re: Potty training a stubborn 3 yr old

I can only offer you the advice we have been given by DS' ABA teachers as DS has had potty training as a program for the last year -- we all thought he would have mastered it in a week -- and yet we are no closer than when we started. DS showed signs he was ready before his 2nd birthday. I didnt push anything, just let him sit on the potty. We read books. We sang songs. Sometimes he went. Sometimes he didnt. Either way we had a "potty party" in the bathroom. But because of his verbal delay, he wouldnt tell us. He mastered the sign for potty (make a "T" and shake it up and down) then started saying it. But he still wouldnt say when he had to go. I attempted the three day potty training and by day three all I had successfully done was pull my hair out and make DS tantrum everytime I told him to "Make sure to keep Thomas dry." He actually started peeing on me (you cant tell me that it wasnt on purpose either). When they officially made it a program, they were taking him every 15 minutes. We started with Craisins as a motivator (he LOVES them). He would go if they put him on but wouldnt ask to go. The he refused to sit on the potty. Then he would only ask to go to the potty as a task avoidance. We moved to M&Ms, which he NEVER got. Then gummy bears. Then PopRocks (thinking maybe it would be good as a sensory thing). He didnt get the whole reward chart. We have still never found a motivator for him that would stick. Jelly beans works for a little while (he still calls them "Potty Bean". He will use the potty before bed but he still wakes up wet. I tried those diapers that get cool when they're wet. He didnt care. He doesnt care if he is in a dirty diaper. He doesnt care if he is in a wet diaper. One of his friends is potty training and he will use her potty. Basically it comes down to the fact that he KNOWS when he has to go. He knows WHERE he has to go. But he just wont do it with any consistency or tell us. I tried using cars. Since he loves playing with water I thought washing his hands would be a reward.....nothing. Nada. Yesterday was his second day of school and the teacher wrote that he went on the potty by himself in the afternoon. Once. The. Whole. Day. Like I said we are where we were a year ago. Big fat failure help I am...

Message edited 9/7/2012 2:54:28 PM.

Posted 9/7/12 2:54 PM
 

2ofakind05
LIF Adolescent

Member since 8/08

754 total posts

Name:
Robyn

Re: Potty training a stubborn 3 yr old

Posted by Domino

I can only offer you the advice we have been given by DS' ABA teachers as DS has had potty training as a program for the last year -- we all thought he would have mastered it in a week -- and yet we are no closer than when we started. DS showed signs he was ready before his 2nd birthday. I didnt push anything, just let him sit on the potty. We read books. We sang songs. Sometimes he went. Sometimes he didnt. Either way we had a "potty party" in the bathroom. But because of his verbal delay, he wouldnt tell us. He mastered the sign for potty (make a "T" and shake it up and down) then started saying it. But he still wouldnt say when he had to go. I attempted the three day potty training and by day three all I had successfully done was pull my hair out and make DS tantrum everytime I told him to "Make sure to keep Thomas dry." He actually started peeing on me (you cant tell me that it wasnt on purpose either). When they officially made it a program, they were taking him every 15 minutes. We started with Craisins as a motivator (he LOVES them). He would go if they put him on but wouldnt ask to go. The he refused to sit on the potty. Then he would only ask to go to the potty as a task avoidance. We moved to M&Ms, which he NEVER got. Then gummy bears. Then PopRocks (thinking maybe it would be good as a sensory thing). He didnt get the whole reward chart. We have still never found a motivator for him that would stick. Jelly beans works for a little while (he still calls them "Potty Bean". He will use the potty before bed but he still wakes up wet. I tried those diapers that get cool when they're wet. He didnt care. He doesnt care if he is in a dirty diaper. He doesnt care if he is in a wet diaper. One of his friends is potty training and he will use her potty. Basically it comes down to the fact that he KNOWS when he has to go. He knows WHERE he has to go. But he just wont do it with any consistency or tell us. I tried using cars. Since he loves playing with water I thought washing his hands would be a reward.....nothing. Nada. Yesterday was his second day of school and the teacher wrote that he went on the potty by himself in the afternoon. Once. The. Whole. Day. Like I said we are where we were a year ago. Big fat failure help I am...



I feel like you are writing about DS. He will go when I take him, but won't ask to go pee. Occasionally, he will go on his own, but not often. However, to add to my confusion, he will say he has to go potty consistently to go poop. He never does that in his pants. Thank goodness for that one. His teacher at his new school requested that we keep him in a pull up, and they will work on it and let us know when to go back to strictly underwear. While I feel like I'm going backward, I don't mind not cleaning up all the messes. Your DS just turned 3, don't stress. He will do it eventually when he's ready.

Posted 9/7/12 5:33 PM
 

babyElaina
LIF Adolescent

Member since 4/07

618 total posts

Name:
Leslie

Re: Potty training a stubborn 3 yr old

My 3.5 year old son isn't potty trained either. It bothers me that each time I put him on the potty before a bath, he struggles each time to get off and won't give it a chance, then he gets in the tub and pees immediately!! It's frustrating. Everyone says he will eventually do it. When???? I'm hoping that he will be more inclined to try the potty once he sees the other kids class using it.

You are not alone!

Posted 9/10/12 5:27 PM
 

EricaAlt
LIF Adult

Member since 7/08

22665 total posts

Name:
Erica

Re: Potty training a stubborn 3 yr old

Posted by babyElaina

My 3.5 year old son isn't potty trained either. It bothers me that each time I put him on the potty before a bath, he struggles each time to get off and won't give it a chance, then he gets in the tub and pees immediately!! It's frustrating. Everyone says he will eventually do it. When???? I'm hoping that he will be more inclined to try the potty once he sees the other kids class using it.

You are not alone!



My son does the exact same thing. I almost want to have him stand in water to go on the potty. Ugh.
Thanks for all the rssponces

Posted 9/11/12 7:06 PM
 

babyonthebrain
Brotherly Love!

Member since 1/08

6209 total posts

Name:
Rafaela

Re: Potty training a stubborn 3 yr old

It takes time to train children with special needs that is the inevitable. Pick a routine/ method and stick to it. I've been doing this since DS was 22 months old. As he gets older he is getting much better, he is now 3 1/2 and is in underwear but still has accidents. He is getting more verbal about going to the potty but its hot or miss. It takes a looong time but it will happen.

Posted 9/25/12 1:33 PM
 
 

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