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Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

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Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy

Member since 3/08

10420 total posts

Name:
Momx100

Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

DS's preschool starts taking kids at age 18 months. I've heard that the youngest class teacher is amazing. At the same time, I can't imagine 14m old DS attending school this fall when he is 18m. He just started taking his first steps and still feels like such a baby.

Right now we could not be any happier with DS's preschool. He is leaning so much and we love the teachers. Our nanny is also great but I don't think DS#2 is getting enough socialization. We recently moved to a single family house so the nanny cannot walk to take him to music, Gymboree, etc. We don't want her driving DS around. The only socialization he gets is when I take him to playdates (usually for his older brother). I can't help but feel guilty because when DS#1 was this age, we lived in Manhattan and he was enrolled in so many activities.

Would you send the younger one to preschool or keep the nanny for another year?

I work about 25 hours a week and DH has one admin day per week (so it is half day off). We basically need care 9-3 4x per week. Preschool is cheaper but money is a non-factor in our decision.

Posted 5/20/12 8:11 PM
 
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Karen
Just chillin'!!

Member since 1/06

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Name:
Karen

Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

Honestly, if you aren't comfortable with the nanny driving him around, then I would strongly consider sending him to school. It's not fair to him (or the nanny) to be stuck inside all day.

Posted 5/20/12 8:30 PM
 

maybesoon
LIF Adult

Member since 9/09

5981 total posts

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Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

Changed answer to nanny

Message edited 5/20/2012 9:46:45 PM.

Posted 5/20/12 9:00 PM
 

ml110
LIF Adult

Member since 1/06

5435 total posts

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Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

Posted by Karen

Honestly, if you aren't comfortable with the nanny driving him around, then I would strongly consider sending him to school. It's not fair to him (or the nanny) to be stuck inside all day.



i agree! i think part of the advantage to having a nanny is more flexibility to do activities and stuff during the day. So if you're not comfortable with her driving him around at all, i don't think its fair to either of them to be stuck in the house all day.
i think even at 18 months, the kids like being with other kids and getting the stimulation and socialization. so i would go with the preschool Chat Icon

Posted 5/20/12 9:01 PM
 

jdbaby
LIF Adolescent

Member since 4/11

660 total posts

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Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

I would go with a preschool if I had to choose.

It's not exactly the same as a full time basis but we are actually enrolling our DS when he is 18 months a few mornings a week for the structure, socialization, activities, etc.

Posted 5/20/12 9:17 PM
 

SecretTTCer
LIF Adult

Member since 6/08

2284 total posts

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Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

I would do nanny. I was in this situation and just felt like if the baby could speak they would ask to stay in their house. This allows them to nap in their own bed and eat in their mother's own food. Also, you don't have to rush to get you and your baby out of the house every morning. You also don't have to worry about germs and getting sick.

Posted 5/20/12 9:18 PM
 

td123
LIF Infant

Member since 3/10

294 total posts

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Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

Personally, I would stick with the nanny for now. I prefer the one to one ratio. Lesser chance of getting sick. At least for another year. While u feel bad about socialization, remember he has an older brother he is learning from that your oldest didn't have. Also, they have weekend activities u can enroll him in as well when you or your dh can drive. Jmo

Posted 5/20/12 9:22 PM
 

maybesoon
LIF Adult

Member since 9/09

5981 total posts

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Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

Posted by SecretTTCer

I would do nanny. I was in this situation and just felt like if the baby could speak they would ask to stay in their house. This allows them to nap in their own bed and eat in their mother's own food. Also, you don't have to rush to get you and your baby out of the house every morning. You also don't have to worry about germs and getting sick.



Oh this post I making me change my answer to nanny, especially napping in his own bed

Posted 5/20/12 9:46 PM
 

SecretTTCer
LIF Adult

Member since 6/08

2284 total posts

Name:

Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

Posted by maybesoon

Posted by SecretTTCer

I would do nanny. I was in this situation and just felt like if the baby could speak they would ask to stay in their house. This allows them to nap in their own bed and eat in their mother's own food. Also, you don't have to rush to get you and your baby out of the house every morning. You also don't have to worry about germs and getting sick.



Oh this post I making me change my answer to nanny, especially napping in his own bed



You also have much more control over the baby's environment. At a daycare, you have to follow their rules. With a nanny, they follow your rules.

Also, don't forget that "school" at 18 months isn't really school. It is daycare. I am not against daycare but it isn't school. Children at that age don't need such a structured environment. Now that doesn't mean that they don't benefit from it, but it isn't a necessity. Before women worked, children would spend years at home exploring. There was no set curriculum that was needed.

I should add that you should only use a nanny that you absolutely love and trust. If you cannot find one, I believe you are better off with daycare. I really struggled with my decision when my daughter was 5 months and I returned to work. But I quickly realized that it was a great decision. My DD is now 25 months old and her babysitter is like a member of the family. I also don't let her drive the baby but they keep busy. I am gone from 8:45-3:30 three days per week but the baby naps at 1:30 so I am not missing much. They play outside, go for walks, bake cakes, color and paint, listen to music, and just play.

Message edited 5/21/2012 2:38:07 PM.

Posted 5/20/12 10:03 PM
 

melbalalala
Little Lady

Member since 5/07

5014 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

Agreed on all points above.. go nanny.. an 18m old doesn't need "school" and the ability to be on their own schedule outweighs any benefits they would get from "school". At this age, there really isn't any socialization, sending an 18m old to a preschool to play next to other 18m olds seems kind of silly.

Posted 5/21/12 9:24 AM
 

mamabear
LIF Adult

Member since 3/08

4539 total posts

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Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

My personal belief is that the ideal situation is a nanny/mom until 2 or 3 depending on the child and mom, and then f/t or p/t daycare depending on the needs and finances of the family.

However, at 18 mths, I personally feel a child needs to get out more, and have sufficient activity. When we had a nanny, my oldest was 18 mths and youngest was an infant. It was great for the baby, but not my 18mth old. The nanny was not active enough, didn't take her out enough and didn't engage her enough. At that age, especially in the summer, I think kids need to get out. Doesn't even have to be socialization, IMO, but they need a change of pace. They need to go on walks, play outside, in a park, go to a museum, the library, etc. If your nanny isn't willing/able to do those things, for whatever reason, I would choose daycare over a nanny.

Posted 5/21/12 9:53 AM
 

Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy

Member since 3/08

10420 total posts

Name:
Momx100

Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

Posted by mamabear

My personal belief is that the ideal situation is a nanny/mom until 2 or 3 depending on the child and mom, and then f/t or p/t daycare depending on the needs and finances of the family.

However, at 18 mths, I personally feel a child needs to get out more, and have sufficient activity. When we had a nanny, my oldest was 18 mths and youngest was an infant. It was great for the baby, but not my 18mth old. The nanny was not active enough, didn't take her out enough and didn't engage her enough. At that age, especially in the summer, I think kids need to get out. Doesn't even have to be socialization, IMO, but they need a change of pace. They need to go on walks, play outside, in a park, go to a museum, the library, etc. If your nanny isn't willing/able to do those things, for whatever reason, I would choose daycare over a nanny.



Our nanny does take DS out of the house. He is not yet walking so she takes him "walking" on our deck, goes on stroller walks around the neghborhood and plays in our backyard.

I host about 1-2 playdates a week, take the boys to the park/playground in the afternoon and do family outings with DH on the weekends. Plus DS has a built in playmate with DS#1.

Everyone's responses are making me even more torn!

Posted 5/21/12 1:00 PM
 

LondonGirl
LIF Infant

Member since 1/12

243 total posts

Name:

Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

Posted by jdbaby

I would go with a preschool if I had to choose.

It's not exactly the same as a full time basis but we are actually enrolling our DS when he is 18 months a few mornings a week for the structure, socialization, activities, etc.




Agreed.

Posted 5/21/12 1:22 PM
 

Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn

Member since 5/05

27567 total posts

Name:
Janice

Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

nanny.
18 mos is still so young.
the 3 days a week you can do stuff with him, that is enough.
those 4 days a week, he will just be with same kids in same atmosphere anyway.
for that, i would keep him home.

Posted 5/21/12 1:32 PM
 

Peainapod
Peanuts are here!

Member since 1/09

13591 total posts

Name:
Diana

Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

I would consider the preschool strongly if you are not comfortable with the nanny driving your DS around to activities. Im a big believer in getting kids out and about being with other kids. If you were ok with the nanny driving around, I would say maybe hold off on the preschool.

DS has been in daycare part time since 3mo old, even now that I am not working he goes 1-2 days. He loves his school, friends, etc.

Message edited 5/21/2012 2:17:36 PM.

Posted 5/21/12 2:16 PM
 

SuzyQ
Mama to 3!?!?!?

Member since 7/06

8069 total posts

Name:
Susan

Re: Would you prefer to send your 18m old to preschool or keep him with the nanny?

Posted by Janice

nanny.
18 mos is still so young.
the 3 days a week you can do stuff with him, that is enough.
those 4 days a week, he will just be with same kids in same atmosphere anyway.
for that, i would keep him home.



I agree. I'd do one more year with the nanny, then preschool when he's 2 (or a little older)

Posted 5/21/12 2:33 PM
 
 

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