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Working with paras/coteachers/etc

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PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)

Member since 7/08

19084 total posts

Name:
Jib

Working with paras/coteachers/etc

I hope this doesn't turn into a 'bash my para' vent.. but I have to say I am just getting to the point where she's hitting my last nerve.

I don't want to go into details now giving dozens of examples from things that happened these last few weeks... but what I will say is that lately she has been getting upset with me for little things and I honestly feel like I'm walking on eggshells. She won't agree with how I will handle something so in return she will give me the silent treatment until I am forced to ask her if something is wrong Chat Icon Yes, mature, I know.. For example she will disagree with how I handle students who don't bring in their hw. She thinks it's unfair if I get very annoyed with one student who doesn't have their hw (specifically a student who NEVER does hw) .. and then I won't get upset with a responsible student who has it all the time but doesn't bring it in like one time a month or something like that. Now .. that issue isn't even the point. I'm the classroom teacher and I decide how I want to run the dynamics of my classroom.

In any case, she will disagree with stuff like that and ignore me.. or refuse to do things for me (para-type responsibilities). She will also stir up drama in the room by going against the things I say in front of the kids. Like, if I tell them to do something, she will openly express her opinion in front of them. For example I told them to do an ELA assignment and she felt there was a better way so in front of the kids she expressed her opinion that she thought my idea made no sense (yet, my kids understood what to do) and openly expresses these things in front of them. Sometimes she will even go so far as to ask me personal questions where the kids could hear.

I am at the point where I am done approaching her to ask if anything is wrong. As far as I am concerned, it takes effort to be annoyed and angry, and if she wants to make that effort and be negative .. that's her problem. There are 10 weeks left and the nonsense is getting so old.


Please tell me there's someone out there who can relate in some way........

Message edited 4/20/2010 12:00:07 AM.

Posted 4/19/10 11:58 PM
 

scubashell44
LIF Adolescent

Member since 8/09

790 total posts

Name:
Michelle

Re: Working with paras/coteachers/etc

Is she older than you? My first year teaching I had a para who could have been my mom and I felt weird giving her directions. It actually gotten written in my observation once that "I'm not utilizing my para". I remember sitting in my post obs. listening to the principal telling all these things that i have to tell her to do and make her do it. It made life in the classroom awkward everytime I saw her do or not do something the principal mentioned.

Basically my point is, is that you better take care of this now before it comes to the principal's attention. Is there someone you can talk to about it? You never know, you might have gotten stuck with the para no one wants because she's a pain in the *** to work with.

Posted 4/20/10 5:33 PM
 

happytobreathe
The Lazy Days of Summer

Member since 10/06

1413 total posts

Name:

Re: Working with paras/coteachers/etc

I can relate in a BIG way. FM anytime!Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 4/20/10 6:30 PM
 

PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)

Member since 7/08

19084 total posts

Name:
Jib

Re: Working with paras/coteachers/etc

Thanks ladies.. I DO utilize her and she has been much better in the past! I think she is having issues outside of school and is taking her problems out on me and the kids. It's bizarre and unfortunate Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 4/20/10 7:34 PM
 

CallaLily
Thank you, Saint Gerard!

Member since 10/07

4937 total posts

Name:

Re: Working with paras/coteachers/etc

Bottom line, you are the teacher in the classroom. I would speak to the head of your department about her. Obviously talking to her has no effect.

Posted 4/20/10 8:06 PM
 

Teachergal
We made a snowman!

Member since 1/08

3239 total posts

Name:

Re: Working with paras/coteachers/etc

Make sure you have documented times that you've spoken to her, suggestions that you've made and examples of her inappropriate behavior. Then, you MUST speak to a "higher" up about this. Her behavior is inexcusable and could lead to a change in student behavior. If they see her disrespect you (which she is), they will do so as well. Good luck Chat Icon

Posted 4/20/10 9:51 PM
 

jgl
Love my little boys!!!

Member since 8/07

7060 total posts

Name:
g

Re: Working with paras/coteachers/etc

I completly understand how you feel. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I am a CTT teacher and have 3 paras this year. So there are 5 adults in my room on a typical basis. 1 para, i have no problems with, the 2nd i can deal with, but the 3rd i cant even stand.

It is very hard to work with that many people in a little space and my coteacher and I had a hard time in the beginning dealing with somethings they did. We both tend to be particular on how we want things to look, to be done ect.. we get along fine because we are pretty much the same when it comes down to these things and this is our 3rd yr teaching together.

we have learned to let go on somethings, to designate tasks for them to do (it is hard to find things for 3 people to do - when not working with the kids) I do feel bad sometimes because this is their classroom too... so I do really try - I do!!

But what I cant stand is the questioning of things we do, being incrediibly nosey and interupting me.

One of my paras interupts me all the time.. for expample (I teach 1st grade)
1. Im teaching a lesson on measurement. we were discussing "a foot" and using your actualy foot to measure. basically I was asking a student that if it toook amy 10 steps to get from point A to B would it take her more or less then her. I said look at your foot compared to amys. is your foot bigger or smaller.. and there is my Para shouting out "it's smaller" Im sorry.. i didnt know you were in first grade? I turned to her and was like, I know you know but I want to see if she knows. Chat Icon
2. Im teaching about 3-d objects and was relating it to 3-d movies and how they pop out at you, in the middle of my lesson, mid sentence she interupts to tell me they are coming out with 3-d television and precedes to try and have a discussion with me about it Chat Icon

It is things like this that I just can not tolerate. This one para has been doing this for 13 years.. at what point are you going to realize that this is noan approriate way to act? And she is a loud mouth who knows EVERYONES business and no matter how nice I could be to tell her that she really cant be doing this, she will bad mouth me. to no end!

Im sorry you are going through this, but know there are a lot of us who know what you are going through,.. just think the end of the year is near!!! Chat Icon

Posted 4/21/10 6:19 PM
 

ricaim
LIF Adult

Member since 8/09

1201 total posts

Name:

Re: Working with paras/coteachers/etc

I think if you are coteaching with another educator, interjections to assist students' understanding of a topic is one thing.

A para making interjections that are helpful, a good thing too.

A para doing his/her part to undermine the lead teacher is completely inappropriate.

I have been in your shoes and had to get my principal involved with an aide in my class. The lady was out of control! After THREE talks with the principal, he must of had it and said something stronger to her. She minds herself much better now, and I am cordial but ask nothing of her that I can't just do myself.

You are not alone!

Posted 4/21/10 8:26 PM
 

BigB
C & J are 10!

Member since 6/05

5914 total posts

Name:
Stacey

Re: Working with paras/coteachers/etc

A para's job is to work with the student they are assigned to. That is it! Just put her in her place and remind her of that!

Don't even get me started with Paras! UGH! In 5 years, I have met only 1 good one! And we have at least 25 kids with Paras in my school!

Posted 4/23/10 6:46 AM
 

MrsRivera
2 under 2...whew!!

Member since 2/07

9876 total posts

Name:
Beth

Re: Working with paras/coteachers/etc

Posted by Renee615

Bottom line, you are the teacher in the classroom. I would speak to the head of your department about her. Obviously talking to her has no effect.



ITA with this. I read your post and the first thing I thought was, "Oh HELLLLLLL no!!!!!".

As you said, YOU are the classroom teacher and the way that room is run is YOUR responsbility. Her job is to work under your command, and she is obviously not living up to her end of the job.

This would be a really hard situation for me, as I am about as non-confrontational as they come, but I think you should sit down with her before or after school and say, "I need for you to understand that this is my classroom, and the way I run it is my business. I am extremely happy to have you here, and to have your support in the classroom, but I need you to please refrain from x, y and z." I would try to put a lot of positives in there, too. Even if they are a stretch.

If she doesn't respond to that talk, then I would be in the principal's office about it ASAP. The way she's acting is COMPLETELY inappropriate...

Posted 4/23/10 11:59 AM
 
 

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