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WWYD? Mom/child class and DD is miserable

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MrsProfessor
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WWYD? Mom/child class and DD is miserable

I signed DD and I up for a "creative playtime" class. It's once a week for 45 minutes. There's a story, a craft and a snack. It's for kids between 2.5 and 5 so DD is at the younger end of the age range, but is able to do all the activities.

However, she hates it. She clings and cries and whines and does not want to participate. I am so bummed because I work and I was so excited to find something that she and I could do together.

It meets 2 more times and I am wondering if I should just bag it because she's so miserable. I think it's driven by shyness, and I don't want to get into the habit of just quitting things, but I feel bad for her, for me and the other kids and parents who have to listen to her.

Any advice?

Posted 10/14/09 2:12 PM
 
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Kelly9904
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Member since 5/05

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Kelly

Re: WWYD? Mom/child class and DD is miserable

Its only 2 more classes, I think I would stick it out. you never know what could happen.

If it was say 5+ more classes I would say just end it. She just might not be ready for that type of setting. How is she at the playground? Does she have any "friends"?

Posted 10/14/09 2:46 PM
 

KateDevine
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Re: WWYD? Mom/child class and DD is miserable

I agree with the PP, since there are only 2 classes left, I'd stick it out. Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 10/14/09 3:11 PM
 

MrsDrMatt
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Member since 5/06

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MrsDrMatt

Re: WWYD? Mom/child class and DD is miserable

You say that you work... who watches her while you work? if she is in daycare Maybe she wants some alone time with you? If she is not in daycare I would definitely stick it out, better now than later...

Posted 10/14/09 3:12 PM
 

nbc188
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Member since 12/06

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C

Re: WWYD? Mom/child class and DD is miserable

I went through something similar with DD a few months ago. We take a Mommy & Me gymnastics class. The first few weeks were MISERABLE. She would cling to me, wouldn't let me put her down, would cry miserably if I did get her out of my arms, etc. She hated it. Well, we stuck it out and she now LOVES gymnastics and loves to "make me proud of her". Chat Icon

Stick with it, I hope she does better as time goes by. I'd try to sign her up for something else soon too since that class is ending, keep it consistent and she'll hopefully come around. Chat Icon

Posted 10/14/09 3:24 PM
 

cjik
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Re: WWYD? Mom/child class and DD is miserable

Given that there are only 2 more classes, I would stick it out.

Is she miserable the entire time or only at certain points? DS has a harder time with certain activities than others. I've also noticed he has a hard time adjusting to new spaces, new people (instructors). He does well when he knows the space and the instructor, when one or both are new, he has trouble initially, though he is not miserable the whole time and adjusts. Currently, I am teaching a Mommy & Me (for kids his age), he comes with me, and he has zero problems in that class.

I know what you mean--I sometimes wonder if he's too young and we should just drop it. But he always warms up in a little time, I think he just needs more time getting used to these things than some kids his age. And when he warms up, he usually seems to have a great time, so then it seem worth it. On the flip side, I wonder if keeping him away from these group settings would just make it harder for him to adjust later when he has to go to school.

Posted 10/14/09 3:31 PM
 

DandN
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Member since 3/06

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Deirdre

Re: WWYD? Mom/child class and DD is miserable

My DD is 2 and a half and is very shy. She's talkative and affectionate and adorable at home - but when she's at the park or with a group, she is incredibly shy. We go to a Mommy and Me type group once a week and for the last 3 weeks she has been clinging to me like glue. She burst into tears when I had to leave the room to go to the bathroom today. In my daughter's case, I think part of the issue is that she is no longer in daycare. I work full time (3 days a week) and we used a combination of daycare, my being with her, and my parents watching her. We stopped daycare in the Spring (I'm off in the summers) and she got very used to having me all to herself. Now she is being watched by me, my parents, and a friend of mine who has a little boy. . . I think my daughter might do better in daycare where she's forced to interact more with other children.

A few weeks ago I put her in a mommy and me gymnastics class and while she's getting better - she's still very shy. Everything is a process and I'm sure your daughter will get more into it - but some children are more quiet than others. My daughter no longer cries during class - though she is still scared of all of her teachers.

I got very frustrated 2 weeks ago and decided that I needed to get DD more used to talking to people/being around other children, etc. So now when we go to the bakery for her favorite Dora cookie, she has to ask for it. Sometimes we have to hang around the bakery for an extra 5 minutes before she gets up the nerve, but she knows that she has to say "one Dora cookie, please" and then "thank you," if she wants that cookie. The same thing goes for a slice of pizza. She must say "thank you" to Jose, the nicest pizza man on earth, if she wants that slice.

. . . and after 2 weeks, I've seen a change. She now says "hi" and "bye bye" and "please," and "thank you" much more readily, and she doesnt appear panicked when she had to deal with other adults.

Today we stayed an extra hour at our mommy and me class because other kids were playing in the gym and some of her friends were there. She didnt want to stay, but since there were only a few kids, it was less intimidating and after a while she was running around and having fun - though constantly looking over to make sure I was there - and often she'd ask me to play with her.

Hang in there!!!!!!Chat Icon

Posted 10/14/09 3:45 PM
 

MrsProfessor
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Re: WWYD? Mom/child class and DD is miserable

Thanks ladies. Chat Icon Chat Icon

She does go to daycare and does fine with those kids, so it's odd to me that she has such issues in this class. She did fine the first class- clingy at first but then she relaxed. The second and third classes she clung the whole time. It's actually gotten worse since the first class, but I don't want to give up.

Posted 10/14/09 4:44 PM
 

cjik
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Member since 2/06

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Re: WWYD? Mom/child class and DD is miserable

Posted by MrsProfessor

Thanks ladies. Chat Icon Chat Icon

She does go to daycare and does fine with those kids, so it's odd to me that she has such issues in this class. She did fine the first class- clingy at first but then she relaxed. The second and third classes she clung the whole time. It's actually gotten worse since the first class, but I don't want to give up.



Maybe she also has trouble adjusting to new spaces/people? It took me awhile to realize this was DSs problem--I think he just needs more time to get used to new things.

I hold him quite a bit when we go someplace new and don't really push him to participate if he's resisting. Just encourage--when he's ready he joins in and usually winds up having a great time.

Or maybe she just wants to be alone with you. Hard to say.

Posted 10/14/09 9:44 PM
 

Charly
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Re: WWYD? Mom/child class and DD is miserable

Posted by MrsProfessor

Thanks ladies. Chat Icon Chat Icon

She does go to daycare and does fine with those kids, so it's odd to me that she has such issues in this class. She did fine the first class- clingy at first but then she relaxed. The second and third classes she clung the whole time. It's actually gotten worse since the first class, but I don't want to give up.



I'm having the same problem with Hannah and ballet. She does fine in daycare but really isn't into ballet. She's fine at home, meaning she'll talk about dance class, get dressed without a fight, but when we get there she is whiny and clingly. The class has 18 girls and she's the youngest. I think in Hannah's class there are too many girls and it's intimidating. How many children are in this group?

Posted 10/15/09 7:59 AM
 
 

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