what else can I do, my toddler hates diapers

I say "its time for a diaper change" and he runs for the hills

I try to catch him when he's kind of bored and wanting my attention, and I say "I'm going to change your diaper" and he starts kicking and screaming no

I ask him to take a toy to the changing table, he grabs it, lets me pick him up and then and he's kicking and screaming the whole way anyway.

I try to change him standing up, its a little easier (at least he's not able to kick me)... so I've been using pullups, but if he has a poop I have to wash him if I change him this way, I can't use wipes.
Once I take off the diaper, I start putting fresh one on, he says "no diaper" ... huh? I don't get it, I tell him you have to pee on the potty then. He says "no" ... okay no ... but what else can I do ... So I force it on every time, and its just getting worse and worse.

He hates the potty now too, but I think its just a bad one for him.

Anyone else going going through this, the only advice I get is time for potty training, I really don't want to do it at 16m.

I might though invest in a better potty and see if he takes to it. The one we have is uncomfortable I think.

The reason why people, my mom, mil, dh, fil, and my ped say he's ready, is because he has peed on the potty when asked to go. Like on queue. He will hold it in, if he's not wearing a diaper and will be in a very strategic place, like right next to it. But he still does have accidents. I rather wait till he fully gets it, that have to deal with this gray area. Its just too hard on me (selfish?)

Message edited 7/23/2011 11:43:39 AM.

Re: what else can I do, my toddler hates diapers

There comes a time when every toddler decides that diapers are evil, and (I think) in an attempt to assert their independence, they fight diaper changes.
If he isn't ready for the potty yet, you have no choice but to use diapers. And this is one of those things where they don't have a choice in the matter...when it's time to change the diaper, it's time!
I don't think there's a magic answer here...except that you have to be assertive and let him know it's not up for discussion. It may not be pretty, but I'm pretty sure everyone goes through it.

Re: what else can I do, my toddler hates diapers

We went through a time when diaper changes were a nightmare - once I literally changed him on the floor with my leg draped across him to hold him down. It was a short-lived phase though.

If he's not completely ready for the potty then I wouldn't try it. I can't imagine it being a good thing if he doesn't fully get it. Keep doing what you are doing. Develop a set diaper routine and stick to it.

Here's what works in our house: DS does not get to watch TV unless its for a diaper change. When it's time for a diaper change (i tell him its time) we go upstairs (i always change him in the same place) and he walks in and walks over to the tv and turns it on (usually works out that Moose A Moose in on, always on Nick Jr). Then he goes on the changing pad on the bed and I change the diaper. When I'm done I bring him down off the bed and wait for him by the door. He then walks over to the TV, turns it off himself and runs into my arms (i make it like a game) and down the stairs we go.

Can't say it will always work but we've been doing it this way for months and so far so good.

Re: what else can I do, my toddler hates diapers

I think this is pretty typical behavior. Both my kids went through this and my 17 mo old is still going through it! You just have to find a trick that works - I think they just don't like to be confined during changing - with DS it was certain toys that would get me through it or even, when i was desperate i would change him in front of tv (since he didn't watch it much it was a novelty for him). With DD - we will sing together or talk through it. but, yes, it is a BIG fight. I don't think it means they are done with diapers - they are just being defiant Even when they are potty trained you will deal with them holding it in to the last second or saying they don't have to go when they do - just b/c they don't want to stop playing or whatever they are doing to go to the potty - same idea KWIM?

Message edited 7/23/2011 1:02:35 PM.

Re: what else can I do, my toddler hates diapers

I recently started to let DS change his teddy bear's diaper. Then I give him a wipe and tell him he can clean himself and change his own diaper. Most of the time, it works! I have to just make sure if he makes a BM to clean first before he has a wipe to try it on his own....

Re: what else can I do, my toddler hates diapers

Been through it and still do go through it at 2 years old. Try to get inventive with the diaper change. #1 I'd say, stop saying, let's change your diaper. You're cueing him into a tantrum. Keep a blanket and some diapers and wipes in your main area (or a few spots) and change him on the couch, floor, ottoman, kitchen table, somewhere new where it may be exciting. I'll sometimes give DS the choice where he wants to be changed. If he's communitcating, give him two choices. He should naturally choose one and not come up with his own third option. Try playing a kazoo or blowing a whistle while you're changing him. Encourage singing a song. Hold a cookie in your mouth and ask him to get it. Change the subject, ask him, remember when you played at "billy's" house yesterday? What did you play with? Or remember when we went to the petting zoo, what did the goat do? Ask questions that you know he knows the answer to and hopefully he'll think about it and redirect his attention while you get the job done. Remind him that it's yucky to have a dirty diaper and he may get a rash if he does not get clean.

Just rambling some methods I use and see friends and family using. Hope they help and good luck. It's a come and go "phase" situation so hang in there and choose your battles!

Re: what else can I do, my toddler hates diapers

It happens with one of my friends all the time with her son. He is 2 and diaper changes are a nightmare. She just holds him down and does it.

Worse than that I have another friend who's kid freaks every time he has to be buckled in his car seat. Once he's in, he is fine but you would think she was torturing him the way he screams on the way into the car seat.