Question for 1st time mommies

Are you worried about how your relationship with DH will change once the baby arrives?

DH and I just decided to start TTC and my biggest reservation is that him and I will loose our marraige in the baby. Not in a selfish way -- we definately want to share our lives with our children. But more in the sense that we'll be so wrapped up in bringing our child into the world and taking care of him/her, that we'll neglect our marraige and loose the relationship we have now. I feel like we'll never have time for just the 2 of us, or to go on "dates" and such. Anyone else afraid of this?

Re: Question for 1st time mommies

I dont think it will be much different as it is now we work opposite shifts and I work every other weekend so we never get to see each other anyway so I am not going to see much a difference but as soon as this lil one starts school I will switch and work days I am sure that I will see what I have been missing all these yrs but we have been together for over 12 years and have a strong relationship

Re: Question for 1st time mommies

I am sure our relationship will change some, but it doesn't worry me. I am excited to see our realtionship grow in a new direction including our DC.

I do think it is important to make time for just the two of us as well, it probably won't happen in the first few months, but after the baby (and us) is settled down, I'd like to be able to have a night or two a month where we can relax, just the two of us.

We went to speak with our pediatrician on Monday night and she told us to accept the help of our families and allow ourselves some time away alone. So now it's Dr's orders too

Re: Question for 1st time mommies

Nope. Not worried. When you get married, you simply have to accept that your relationship with your spouse changes over time. That comes with having kids, changing jobs, the responsibility of running/owning a home and whatever else life throws your way. If a person can't be flexible and accept the changes, then it becomes a problem. It's a part of growing up.

My parents were married for 49 years and my mom used to tell me this all the time.

Re: Question for 1st time mommies

I'm not nervous that our marriage will change, I'm excited to see how it will change. I know DH is going to be a great dad and I don't think anything will be as amazing as seeing him raise his little boy. I definately don't think it will be a walk in the park, but we have grown so much closer while TTC and during the pregnancy and I hope that continues after I give birth.

Re: Question for 1st time mommies

Nope...my kid will come first...DH understands that...if he doesn't...he will learn very quickly!!!


Seriously, my DH and I have been together 7 years and many events that we had to get through together...this is a journey like any other.