Not sure which board to post on: What to do about SIL baby shower gift?

http://www.lifamilies.com/chat/topic-206406-1.html

Re: Not sure which board to post on: What to do about SIL baby shower gift?

This is such a touchy situation.
Is your MIL in assistant living because she is not in the right frame of mind or is it do to another illness,yet she is OK mentally? I ask because if she has her wits about her..then she herself was aware of your bridal shower and baby shower and could have herself told BIL to allocate $ for gifts in her name to yourself and your DH. But did not.
If she is not in a healthy mental state,then of course- she is at no fault.

Either way, SIL is no stranger to the customs of baby/bridal showers( unless she has been living under a rock) and could have told her DH " Hey Hubby, its BIL & SIL's shower..we really should get something for them,in MIL's name..give me X amount of $$..and I'll go buy something off the registry tomorrow"..call me crazy but thats what I would have done if I was the SIL in your case & believe me..I'd buy you something nice ! But she didn't..and she had not one,but two chances to save face.

So now,go against your giving nature and act as naive as she did in the past. NOTHING from MIL purchased by you!
But feel free to spoil the baby with gifts from yourself and DH- after all, its a baby and who can resist.

Re: Not sure which board to post on: What to do about SIL baby shower gift?

She had a stroke several years ago and has no short term memory so she wouldnt be aware on her own to buy a gift or even tell BIL to buy a gift for the shower. And I don't blamer her at all.

What upsets me is that given the sad situation, BIL and SIL should have taken into consideration this is her FIRST grandchild (and only grandchild right now) and acknowledged that on her behalf. That is what I would have done. I feel bad more so for DH b/c it really upset him.

Message edited 10/8/2007 12:25:43 AM.

Re: Not sure which board to post on: What to do about SIL baby shower gift?

Ok, so MIL is excused.
I could understand how your DH would be upset.
I stand my ground,no gifts for her from MIL - purchased with your money.
Now lets see if BIL is all of a sudden thoughtful and takes out $$ to buy his wife ( and himself ) a gift from MIL. If that would happen, I think I'd freakin' flip!
Of course, only if he is stupid would he ever admit to it,he could just say he himself bought the gift to cover MIL. You'll most likely never know.

Re: Not sure which board to post on: What to do about SIL baby shower gift?