Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

I REALLY REALLY would love to BF Loey until 6 months... that's my ultimate goal.

But I feel like I'm already facing challenges and he's not even 3 weeks old yet!

First off, this kid LOVES to eat! He seems to want to eat all the time.

For example, yesterday -

10:30 am - left side, 20 minutes
10:52 am - right side, 48 minutes
12:33 pm - left side, 25 minutes
1:05 pm - right side, 5 minutes
1:18 pm - right side, 16 minutes
2:05 pm - left side, 28 minutes
4:22 pm - right side, 25 minutes
4:53 pm - left side, 10 minutes
5:20 pm - left side, 20 minutes

I stopped writing after that because it was basically every hour he was wanting to eat!

How do you make things work this way? Usually he wants to eat every 2 hours. He feeds for about 20-25 minutes on each side and then with burping/changing him.. an hour has passed. Then there's only 1 hour before he wants to eat again! How do you get anything done or go anywhere?

He eats and eats and then SCREAMS like he hasn't eaten in days! I think it's "cluster-feeding?" but how long does that last? It's SO draining! Do formula-fed babies cluster-feed too?

Also, I go back to work on February 1st. Loey will be about 6 weeks old.

How often should I be pumping NOW to help get a little freezer supply? How often should I pump at work? (I leave the house around 6:45 and get home around 3:00 or so). The past few days I've been pumping 1x/day after his morning feed and have been getting around 3 ounces (combined) in about 10 minutes (usually in the first 5 minutes then I keep the pump on for another 5 minutes). After that though, my nipples are SO sore! And then I get nervous that Loey will want to eat again soon after and my nipples won't be able to take it!

--

As far as sleeping... does anyone have any tips/tricks/advice for getting him to sleep somewhere besides on me?

We've tried the bouncy seat, swing, PnP, arm's reach mini cosleeper (as bassinet), and even one of those cosleeper things that goes IN the bed with you. He won't sleep in any of them. He screams and screams after being in there less than a minute!

I get SO nervous with him sleeping on me... i'm scared that he'll suffocate or fall or something! Plus, I know that I won't be able to do this when I go back to work in a little over 3 weeks from now... I won't be able to function on so little sleep! What should I do?

ETA: He HAAAATES being swaddled! He kicks out VIOLENTLY and screams!

Message edited 1/6/2010 2:46:48 PM.

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

this is what makes bf'ing so hard and why so many choose not to. he will eat like that for a couple of weeks. does he fall asleep while he is sucking? some of that time he's on the breast may be just for soothing and not for hunger. Luce was like that until I introduced the paci.

I also slept with him on my chest the first fews weeks of his life. once his head is to one side, he didn't move it so we were all good. now, when he finally goes down, he'll sleep anywhere...pack and play, cradle, bed, crib. it just takes time. you should notice a change w/i the next 2 weeks or so. he'll occasionally fall asleep in his swing, but he usually likes to be held to fall asleep. and if I am putting him to sleep, I MUST give him the boob. he spits out everything else with a look like "I KNOW that is not YOU mommy" .

3 ounces AFTER a feeding is great. I barely get anything (but I have production issues).

I also did a modified swaddle on Luce...I would swaddle his arms but not his feet...he'd eventually wiggle out but his body was still within the blanket and he still got the "womb" effect. I also used a sleep positioner for a bit. that helped too.

I think these phases seem to last forever b/c there is really no "end" to our days..especially in the beginning..it's just one continuous "day" and it grinds you down.

so, to sum up feeding like that is normal, you will see improvement in a few weeks, as long as his face is pointing out sleeping on your chest is ok (just don't wear loose clothing), pump away! I would also pump and have steve feed him a bottle to see how many ounces he takes at a time.

hang in there kid. pretty soon you'll be pureeing veggies!!!

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

In my experience (I BF DD until 21 months) any feeding that lasted longer than 20 minutes total (whether it was 20 minutes on one side, or 10 on each)was about comfort NOT eating. By the time DD was 4-5 weeks old she established a routine of only eating on one side at each feeding. She also became much more proficient and feedings dropped to 10-15 minutes.

For me, I found that she would eat @ 1-2AM, and then not again until 6 -6:30 am (her longest stretch until she was 4 months). I pumped at 6am, and if she woke up hungry, daddy comforted her until I was done pumping. She always got enough at that morning feeding, and I built up a freezer stash b/c I always had the best pump output first thing in the morning.

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

Hey Hayley! Congrats on Loey, he's beautiful!! I remember feeling like I was literally tied down to the bed in those first few weeks! I rarely ever left the house for the first 6 weeks because my DS was always attached to the boob! It does get better in time, as they become more efficient suckers. Like the OP, I also did most of my sleeping with Frankie laying across me on the Boppy! I believe they also go through their 1st major growth spurt at around 3 weeks, which could also be contributing to him eating more often right now!!

Hang in there- it'll get better!! I never imagined I'd make it through and now at almost 11 months I am still BFing (my goal was also 6 months).

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

Posted by MrsP747

Hey Hayley! Congrats on Loey, he's beautiful!! I remember feeling like I was literally tied down to the bed in those first few weeks! I rarely ever left the house for the first 6 weeks because my DS was always attached to the boob! It does get better in time, as they become more efficient suckers. Like the OP, I also did most of my sleeping with Frankie laying across me on the Boppy! I believe they also go through their 1st major growth spurt at around 3 weeks, which could also be contributing to him eating more often right now!!

Hang in there- it'll get better!! I never imagined I'd make it through and now at almost 11 months I am still BFing (my goal was also 6 months).

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

it's really hard mama!! all of what you wrote is normal. believe me. when i was going through it i was like NO!! my kid is damaged !! this can't be normal!! but it is. i also completely gave up keeping track of her nursing times because as soon as she was done she'd start again. it was a never ending cycle!!

he'll nurse constantly and that's good so that your supply can be established. pretty soon he'll be efficient at nursing in a short amount of time and you'll feel full if he hasn't nursed in two hours or so.

as for sleeping, how's his head control? i always ask this because allison had really good head control and was completely fine sleeping on her tummy even though that's one of the biggest no-no's out there. i supervised her in the beginning and she'd nap for a good two hours on her tummy.

even though loey hates being swaddled, have you tried giving him a nice tight swaddle? allison's startle reflex always scared the crap out of her, sleeping on her belly took that away and that's why she was able to give me a longer stretch. also, if i swaddled her vs my DH swaddling her, it was a noticeable difference. my DH was terrified of swaddling her too snug and she'd break out of it. we'd always say that her little paw poked through, it was the cutest thing!!! okay, sorry, got sidetracked, lol!

try those things, hope they help!!!

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

Posted by Ophelia

this is what makes bf'ing so hard and why so many choose not to. he will eat like that for a couple of weeks. does he fall asleep while he is sucking? some of that time he's on the breast may be just for soothing and not for hunger. Luce was like that until I introduced the paci.

I also slept with him on my chest the first fews weeks of his life. once his head is to one side, he didn't move it so we were all good. now, when he finally goes down, he'll sleep anywhere...pack and play, cradle, bed, crib. it just takes time. you should notice a change w/i the next 2 weeks or so. he'll occasionally fall asleep in his swing, but he usually likes to be held to fall asleep. and if I am putting him to sleep, I MUST give him the boob. he spits out everything else with a look like "I KNOW that is not YOU mommy" .

3 ounces AFTER a feeding is great. I barely get anything (but I have production issues).

I also did a modified swaddle on Luce...I would swaddle his arms but not his feet...he'd eventually wiggle out but his body was still within the blanket and he still got the "womb" effect. I also used a sleep positioner for a bit. that helped too.

I think these phases seem to last forever b/c there is really no "end" to our days..especially in the beginning..it's just one continuous "day" and it grinds you down.

so, to sum up feeding like that is normal, you will see improvement in a few weeks, as long as his face is pointing out sleeping on your chest is ok (just don't wear loose clothing), pump away! I would also pump and have steve feed him a bottle to see how many ounces he takes at a time.

hang in there kid. pretty soon you'll be pureeing veggies!!!

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

Posted by MrsP747

Hey Hayley! Congrats on Loey, he's beautiful!! I remember feeling like I was literally tied down to the bed in those first few weeks! I rarely ever left the house for the first 6 weeks because my DS was always attached to the boob! It does get better in time, as they become more efficient suckers. Like the OP, I also did most of my sleeping with Frankie laying across me on the Boppy! I believe they also go through their 1st major growth spurt at around 3 weeks, which could also be contributing to him eating more often right now!!

Hang in there- it'll get better!! I never imagined I'd make it through and now at almost 11 months I am still BFing (my goal was also 6 months).

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

It sounds like he's going throuhg a growth spurt. Those are the toughest to get through, but hopefully it will be better in a few days.

All babies are different. Some are efficient nursers from the beginning and only need 10 minutes to be satisfied while others take much longer. DS nursed for 45-60 minutes as a newborn. Even now, at almost 13 months, he nurses for 20 minutes. Try to listen for him swallowing. If he's not swallowing, then he's nursing for comfort. Don't be afraid to use a pacifier. Some babies just like to suck. It's very soothing.

Use Lansinoh cream. It's helps a lot. The first 6-8 weeks of BFing were very painful for me, but it got so much better after that.

I pumped once per day for 15 minutes right after the first morning nursing session. I was able to build a good freezer stash when I went back to work. When you go back, make sure you're pumping as often as DC will be eating. It will hep maintain your supply.

ETA: DS wouldn't sleep anywhere but in our arms. He'd wake up as soon as we tried to put him down and he was hysterical. I held him for the first 3.5 months and then DH held him for a few months. It was the only way we got some sleep. My sleep was so interrupted, but I learned to function on it.

Message edited 1/6/2010 4:52:09 PM.

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

Posted by hunnybunnyxoxo

completely agree with Marie here! it's a growth spurt! enjoy your time relaxing on the couch. it might drive you crazy but think of this as your free pass on doing any house work!
in my case it was winter and i couldn't take the baby out anyway ...

in response to pumping, the best time to pump is in the AM when you supply is up. 3 ounce pump session is great!!!
it's tough b.c you only have 6 weeks maternity leave!! whats up wth that?!?! you had a c section!!!
it will be hard to get a full days stash for when you return to work without you going crazy - only b/c Logan is on your boob every other hour ! it will be tough to squeeze in a pump session. just do your best without compromising your sanity! you might have to supplement with formula... - i had to/have to supplement. i am without stress knowing that i dont have to stay up all night or wake up an extra hour earlier to meet the quota!!
i now only pump twice a day at work and just recently cut it down to 1 pump session. Mady turned 1 so i have met my goal the rest is just a bonus...

in your case, since logan is a newborn, i would pump before you leave for work, pump twice at work, and before you go to bed. this will maintain your supply. eventually you can eliminate one of the sessions and so on ...

good luck!! hang in there!!

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

Posted by bonitachyc

it's really hard mama!! all of what you wrote is normal. believe me. when i was going through it i was like NO!! my kid is damaged !! this can't be normal!! but it is. i also completely gave up keeping track of her nursing times because as soon as she was done she'd start again. it was a never ending cycle!!

he'll nurse constantly and that's good so that your supply can be established. pretty soon he'll be efficient at nursing in a short amount of time and you'll feel full if he hasn't nursed in two hours or so.

as for sleeping, how's his head control? i always ask this because allison had really good head control and was completely fine sleeping on her tummy even though that's one of the biggest no-no's out there. i supervised her in the beginning and she'd nap for a good two hours on her tummy.

even though loey hates being swaddled, have you tried giving him a nice tight swaddle? allison's startle reflex always scared the crap out of her, sleeping on her belly took that away and that's why she was able to give me a longer stretch. also, if i swaddled her vs my DH swaddling her, it was a noticeable difference. my DH was terrified of swaddling her too snug and she'd break out of it. we'd always say that her little paw poked through, it was the cutest thing!!! okay, sorry, got sidetracked, lol!

try those things, hope they help!!!

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

I can really only comment on the pumping. Pump as much as you can now especially if you have to go back in 6 weeks. I used to pump after every feeding. This way my supply would increase.

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

Posted by maybeamommy

Posted by bonitachyc

it's really hard mama!! all of what you wrote is normal. believe me. when i was going through it i was like NO!! my kid is damaged !! this can't be normal!! but it is. i also completely gave up keeping track of her nursing times because as soon as she was done she'd start again. it was a never ending cycle!!

he'll nurse constantly and that's good so that your supply can be established. pretty soon he'll be efficient at nursing in a short amount of time and you'll feel full if he hasn't nursed in two hours or so.

as for sleeping, how's his head control? i always ask this because allison had really good head control and was completely fine sleeping on her tummy even though that's one of the biggest no-no's out there. i supervised her in the beginning and she'd nap for a good two hours on her tummy.

even though loey hates being swaddled, have you tried giving him a nice tight swaddle? allison's startle reflex always scared the crap out of her, sleeping on her belly took that away and that's why she was able to give me a longer stretch. also, if i swaddled her vs my DH swaddling her, it was a noticeable difference. my DH was terrified of swaddling her too snug and she'd break out of it. we'd always say that her little paw poked through, it was the cutest thing!!! okay, sorry, got sidetracked, lol!

try those things, hope they help!!!

thanks for the encouragement lupe!

you're so right... sometimes it feels like something must be wrong, he can't STILL be hungry! i think i'll probably stop keeping track of the nursing times soon too.. it's just a neverending cycle like you said!

i'm not sure about the head control. when he sleeps on me... he sleeps on his stomach with his head to the side, facing me. he can lift his head (using his arms to help) and he does that when he wants to unlatch from the boob at night... and he tries to turn his head and can somewhat turn it to the other side, but i get nervous!

i'll try a tighter swaddle! what did you use to swaddle? i tried the swaddle-me blanket (HATED IT!) and the sleepsack (hated it too!)

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

Hayley- first off Congrats!

I don't know about BF - But I really really really suggest going out and buying the Miracle Blanket (BBB sells it or you can get it online)

It truly works Miracles!

Also, get a sleep positioner. That has helped both of my boys to sleep better!

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

My DS is just waking so I only have time for quick response but it will get better!! The first couple of weeks I thought about giving up because I needed sleep and it seemed he was ALWAYS on my boob but they do learn to eat everything they need and stop and it gets easier and they will go 3 hours between feedings soon, once it gets better you will be SOO happy you stuck with it

If for any reason you choose to stop just know that even the 3 weeks you have done is a great job and it better then nothing!!

Good luck!!

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

Posted by maybeamommy

Posted by hunnybunnyxoxo

completely agree with Marie here! it's a growth spurt! enjoy your time relaxing on the couch. it might drive you crazy but think of this as your free pass on doing any house work!
in my case it was winter and i couldn't take the baby out anyway ...

in response to pumping, the best time to pump is in the AM when you supply is up. 3 ounce pump session is great!!!
it's tough b.c you only have 6 weeks maternity leave!! whats up wth that?!?! you had a c section!!!
it will be hard to get a full days stash for when you return to work without you going crazy - only b/c Logan is on your boob every other hour ! it will be tough to squeeze in a pump session. just do your best without compromising your sanity! you might have to supplement with formula... - i had to/have to supplement. i am without stress knowing that i dont have to stay up all night or wake up an extra hour earlier to meet the quota!!
i now only pump twice a day at work and just recently cut it down to 1 pump session. Mady turned 1 so i have met my goal the rest is just a bonus...

in your case, since logan is a newborn, i would pump before you leave for work, pump twice at work, and before you go to bed. this will maintain your supply. eventually you can eliminate one of the sessions and so on ...

good luck!! hang in there!!

thanks lisa! i know, 6 weeks stinks! but that's the only paid time i have and we really can't afford for me to take any upaid time - kwim?

when you supplemented, did you do it from a bottle? and when did you start to introduce the bottle?

thanks for the advice!!!

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

Re: Need some BFing and sleeping advice/support/motivation... SUPER LONG!

As far as the BFing, that all sounds completely normal for that age. I know it sounds miserable, but try to stick it out for 2 or 3 more weeks. I promise after the 6 week growth spurt you are likely so see big changes. I remember not being able to tell the ped how often it was between feedings the first month because it felt like my life was one giant feeding session. After 6 weeks, I suddenly started seeing periods of time where I wasn't chained to the couch nursing. Honestly, it was very difficult to do anything. I guess I was expecting it because I remember the first 6 weeks with DD being the same hell. This time around, I kept the laptop handy & used the time I was nursing to watch Disney Princess movies with DD.

I would use this time to build a freezer stash. I had a ridiculous oversupply for the first 3 months. I pumped every chance I got & at one point literally had over 300oz in my freezer. I'm glad I did that. I only work PT, but I have to tell you it has been bliss not having to stress about having a poor output day at work. I know I have that stash to back me up. I'm glad now too because DS is almost 9 months & my body seems to be sick of the pump. I have enough in the freezer that he's still able to get BM even though I'm not able to pump as much these days. An added bonus was that I never had to worry about going out or doing things away from DS. I know I had that freezer milk so I could always pump later on instead of forcing it when I needed to be out.

For nipple soreness, as long as your sure your latch is correct, try Lansinoh Lanolin cream. Very soothing. I believe they also make little nipple ice packs. "Soothies" maybe? Again, in the next few week, I promise that will subside.

I wish I could help with the sleep issues. I'm on my second bad sleeper & we still haven't figured it out