Moms of children less than 2 years apart....question

My girls are 20 months apart and are now 4 and alittle over 2 years old. Its seems like all of a sudden everything is competition. Competition for my attention, who gets their food, milk first, who has to go to the bathroom first, who kisses mommy or daddy first, competition for toys, movies, shows etc....you get the point
Its turned into a battle for my attention - or anyone for that matter that is around them.

Me and my sis are 13 months apart and my brother and sis are 15 months apart - so i remember the need to get our parents attention, or to be favored etc....

Its just getting crazy - my head is spinning and they are jumping at me constantly for me to cater to them first.....
How do you handle this when it happens? Do you notice this behaviour with your children? I try to tell them that mommy loves you both and you have to give mommy a chance, this time I will take care of J, next time L will get her lunch first etc.....

Please help!

Re: Moms of children less than 2 years apart....question

Oh Yes!

DS is 3 and DD is 21 months. Somedays I want to cry. It is so hard with them grabbing toys, fighting for mommy.

DS has lately been a lot more gentle and sharing towards DD- I don't have any suggestions- just hoping it will get easier as they get older.

Re: Moms of children less than 2 years apart....question

My DD is 3.2 and DS is 20 months. I'm starting to see this happening. What I've been trying to do is alternate who goes first. For example, gets their food served first, gets their book selection read first, brushing teeth, giving the cat her treats/food, etc. I started a chart and every other day someone get's to go first for their routine activities. It used to be who asked first, but DD is faster and communicates better so that wasn't working.

My 3 year old gets it for the most part (although she doesn't always like it) and i make sure i praise her for being a big girl, good big sister, patient, etc. whatever the situation calls for.

When DS is crying because he didn't get to go first, I just try to explain to him he has to wait his turn. He's getting there. When he's done taking his turn we all clap and make a big deal so he doesn't think going second is a bad thing. The amount of crying has definitely decreased.

As for the toys that one's harder. I basically say whoever had it first gets to play with it (regardless of who's toy it is) and when they are done with their turn they are to give the other one a turn. And then praise for sharing, waiting, etc. I really try hard to stay calm and reasonable (although I will admit sometimes I get frustrated and just take the darn thing away )

Message edited 1/29/2010 9:05:26 PM.