Just had a good cry for myself

I'm starting to look ahead to the birth of my little girl, and realizing that some of the things I had counted on are not going to be possible.

I asked (begged is more like it) my neurosurgeon to set up my back surgery for the day after DD is born. He wouldn't do it, saying that I won't be able to lay on my stomach after a c-section. Makes sense to me, but I'm getting very upset about this.

Breastfeeding is something I REALLY want to do--come hell or high water, even if she doesn't latch on, I'm going to pump. Well, how am I supposed to breastfeed when I can't sit for 2 minutes upright in a chair? Not only that, they told me that they can continue my painkillers on stronger doses until I can have the surgery done, but I would have to "pump and dump" because the meds will come through in the breastmilk.

I'm just starting to picture what those first few days home are going to be like--days that I'm not going to get back with my little girl. I'll be lucky if I can even hold her, much less anything else.

I just want to scream, "OK, joke's over!!!"

Re: Just had a good cry for myself

You've been through so much. I know it's hard, but try not to focus on the negative. You're doing what's best for you and your .

Re: Just had a good cry for myself

I know it seems overwhelming, just take one step at a time.
You can BF laying on your side. Maybe it would help ease some worries if you met with a LC now who could help you explore some options.
Also double check about painkillers, maybe there might be some options for you just until your surgery. I didn't need them after surgery, I swear that surgery was a miracle.
Try not to think too much.

Re: Just had a good cry for myself

Re: Just had a good cry for myself