Has DH ever did something extremely "thoughtful" UPDATE on last post...

I am so upset at how I reacted, but i'm also upset about this whole thing...

every year, for the last 10 years, I have gone to somehting called "Winter Solstice" - its a concert at Cathedral of St. Paul in the city. Its this beuatiful concert with a man named Paul Winter and other musicians.

i told DH that this year we probably wont be able to go this year, even though I really wanted to take Cailen.

We always go Saturday afternoon, The show is performed Thurs and Fri nites, and Sat afternoon, Sat eve, Sun aft, and Sun eve...

i knew our Saturdays were booked, and it would be expensive... So this would be the 1st in 10 yrs I didnt go. I really was ok with it...


So, I wake up this morning - and theres a birthday card next to my bed. Inside, it said that my present was Paul Winter concerts for Fri Dec 14, since he knew I wanted Cailen to go.

So i'm thinking maybe its during the day. Ok, so I'll have to take off, etc. There was also an xmas party at the health system I was going to take Cailen to, but thats ok....

So, I call DH and ask him what time the concert is. He says 7:00PM...




So, I'm going to have to get my stepdaughters, drive all the way uptown (its in the 100's on the upper west side) wait in line because its general admission - and you have to be early and wait an hour online for good seats, all the while during Cailen's bedtime.

AND - I have a very, very, very important exam the following morning at 7:45AM.

I lost it on DH - I kept apologizing for crying because I know he wanted me to be happy, and I just couldnt be. I am so stressed about how I'm going to be able to juggle getting there alone (when is Cailen going to eat dinner?? How is he going to be without his bedtime I dont think we could even bring a stroller there)

Plus getting my stepdaughters and driving Friday night into the city to get there by 6:00!!!!

And then having to wake up at around 4:30-5:00 the next morning to get to an exam....

I feel so awful. I know he's depressed about his daughter, and now I made him even more upset because he wanted to do somehting nice....

I swear I feel like I'm having a complete and utter nervous breakdown.

how am I going to do this???

And, how awful of a wife am I for flipping out????



ETA - this concert has always been very peaceful - but we always went as a family together on a calm Saturday with nothing else to do...

I should also add I've been obsessing about this exam for a while. I am miserable at my current job, and I have a few other job offers if pass this test to get the certification that I need, so a lot of riding on this exam...

Message edited 11/30/2007 12:36:30 PM.

Re: Has DH ever did something extremely "thoughtful" that you flipped out about?

Aw, it sounds very overwhelming It sounds like he didn't think it through fully (not man-bashing here, but we would usually think of ALL details). Is there any way you could switch the dates for the tickets? Like try to sell yours and get the tickets for the time you can go?

I agree, he was very thoughtful, but you're feeling very overwhelmed at eveything you'd have to do just to get to the concert on that day, much less have an exam the next day.

Re: Has DH ever did something extremely "thoughtful" that you flipped out about?

Re: Has DH ever did something extremely "thoughtful" that you flipped out about?

I could see what you mean. he did something so nice...but seriously, traffic in the city on a friday during holiday season is horrendous!!!

can you switch the tkts?

Re: Has DH ever did something extremely "thoughtful" that you flipped out about?

No - we cant get our monmey back and theres no other day we can go...

its gonna s ck, but I'm sure it will be ok...

He brought home a gift card for a massage, facial, and manicure tonight - I am going to get that the day after my exam!!!

Re: Has DH ever did something extremely "thoughtful" that you flipped out about?

Good for you!! Enjoy!

I'm sorry you were in a tough situation. You made perfect sense and I know how much more upsetting and stressful it was because he was trying to do something nice for you.

Re: Has DH ever did something extremely "thoughtful" that you flipped out about?

This is probably not one of the suggestions you'd like to hear BUT what about getting a sitter for Cailen that night. It's late and it sounds like it will be awfully hectic for an infant. I know you wanted him to experience it but you have next year and many more to come for that. It just sounds so overwhelming.

Re: Has DH ever did something extremely "thoughtful" that you flipped out about?

it sounds very overwelming is a babysitter out of the question????

Re: Has DH ever did something extremely "thoughtful" that you flipped out about?

Re: Has DH ever did something extremely "thoughtful" that you flipped out about?

Re: Has DH ever did something extremely "thoughtful" that you flipped out about?

Posted by lipglossjunky73

Posted by Lucky

This is probably not one of the suggestions you'd like to hear BUT what about getting a sitter for Cailen that night. It's late and it sounds like it will be awfully hectic for an infant. I know you wanted him to experience it but you have next year and many more to come for that. It just sounds so overwhelming.

Unfortunately, I have no free sitters availabe to me

Re: Has DH ever did something extremely "thoughtful" that you flipped out about?

Nice idea but wrong timing. This is something my DH would do and don't be upset that you flipped out- I would have too. I also have an exam on the 15th that I am stressing about big time- is the same one?

6pm-Friday night, city, teenagers and baby who needs to in bed- NOT a good time if you ask me