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nferrandi
too excited for words
Member since 10/05 18538 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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had my parent-teacher conference today
And unfortunately, I wasn't told anything I don't know. She said that he is super smart, especially since he's one of the younger ones (just turned 4 Oct 26) but he has a hard time following directions and focusing. He doesn't like being told what to do and when he does do something wrong, he usually doesn't feel too bad about it. She also wished he was a little more advanced with his letter recognition. The tough thing is, I work on him with all of those things. I just don't know what to do anymore. I am starting to question if he's just a tough kid, or if he has legitimate behavioral issues. I'm just really feeling like a cr@ppy mom right now. 
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Posted 12/2/10 11:04 AM  |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
You're only a crappy mom if you didn't care about this stuff and ignored the possibilty of there being real issues.
Also - keep in mind the quote : Well-behaved women never make history. Same applies for the boys. 
Message edited 12/2/2010 11:06:52 AM.
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| Posted 12/2/10 11:06 AM |
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CathyB
Member since 5/05 19403 total posts
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
Don't be so hard on yourself, a lot of that sounds typical for boys that age, at least from what I hear from other moms and DS's teacher. She told me that my DS can be misbehaved around certain other kids so now she's separating a lot of the kids and trying to pair them up with other kids that she thinks will mesh together better. It's hard not to take it personally, I know how you feel.
Message edited 12/2/2010 11:08:39 AM.
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| Posted 12/2/10 11:07 AM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19454 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
I am sorry. You are not a bad mom because you care and are trying to do something about the issues.
As for letter recognition, does he have a favorite character? I would get a book with that character and have him help you read it by telling you the letters on the page. I do this with DS and it seems to be working.
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| Posted 12/2/10 11:09 AM |
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nferrandi
too excited for words
Member since 10/05 18538 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
Posted by LSP2005
I am sorry. You are not a bad mom because you care and are trying to do something about the issues.
As for letter recognition, does he have a favorite character? I would get a book with that character and have him help you read it by telling you the letters on the page. I do this with DS and it seems to be working.
BTDT. We hae lots of letter books with his favorite things- like pirates. And we do cue card games too. Sometimes I honestly think he knows more then he lets on. He's the type of kid who gives me the wrong answer on purpose and then looks at me with a sly grin.
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| Posted 12/2/10 11:11 AM |
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
Aww I am so sorry Hun!!! Do you think you should have him evaluated?
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| Posted 12/2/10 11:13 AM |
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CookiePuss
Cake from Outer Space!
Member since 5/05 14007 total posts
Name:
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
Can you try giving directions in a different way? Maybe giving visual cues as opposed to just verbal?
I don't think you should feel like a cr@appy mom. Kids develop at their own pace regardless of what we do sometimes.
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| Posted 12/2/10 11:14 AM |
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nferrandi
too excited for words
Member since 10/05 18538 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
Posted by CookieMomster
Aww I am so sorry Hun!!! Do you think you should have him evaluated?
The teacher thinks he's too young to get a diagnosis right now, since he's not really "behind" in anything EI related. And the slight possibility that he;s ADD is again, too young to properly diagnose.
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| Posted 12/2/10 11:15 AM |
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DBJ808
LIF Adult
Member since 6/09 1039 total posts
Name:
Dana
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
Ok I don't know anything about you, your child, or your situation except for what is in the post. Is he in kindergarten??? I am a kindergarten teacher (well was before I just has DS) and everything you are describing is TYPICAL of a child that goes in a little younger. All of her concerns are directly associated with maturity and development. At that age there is a HUGE difference between a 4 year old and a 5 year old. It is like night and day!!! I could tell on the first day of school who the young chicks were in the class just by interaction. As far as letter recognition, it is only December!!! He should have these mastered in a few months but he still has time. You seem like the kind of mommy who works with her child everyday on this so he will get it at some point. If the teacher is so concerned maybe she could give you some manipulatives to work with him on this at home. If you have ANY questions at all please feel free to FM me!
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| Posted 12/2/10 11:39 AM |
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nferrandi
too excited for words
Member since 10/05 18538 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
He actually just turned 4, so he's in his second year of pre school. I asked if she was concerned he may not go into Kindergarten next year and she said he was too smart to be held back. But that his focus issues may be a problem next year.
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| Posted 12/2/10 11:58 AM |
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DBJ808
LIF Adult
Member since 6/09 1039 total posts
Name:
Dana
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
Wow! He is only in preschool and she is concerned with mastering letter recognition??? Let me start by saying this... kindergarten is a clean slate! We treat the kids as if they know NOTHING and then tailor instruction to meet individual needs once we understand their knowledge base. Although MOST parents send children to preschool, the kindergarten curriculum is designed to teach the basics in the beginning so all of the children are "up to speed." It is the one year in school where every child is coming from different backgrounds (different preschools, no preschool, exposed to different things in the home, outside the home, etc.). So at that age, their knowledge base and exposure varies pretty drastically from child to child. So it is the teachers job to differentiate the instruction to cater to your specific child's ability levels. The ultimate goal is to have all of them meeting the kindergarten standards and be ready for the first grade. The first 3 months of kindergarten are focused on letter recognition.... so if he doesn't get it this year he will have the extra reinforcement next year. As far as behavior, that is the ONLY thing that I worry about with the younger kids. Readiness for kindergarten is really more social then it is intellectual. I have had so many children that are so smart but just weren't mature enough because they were young and had difficulty with friends/following instructions/etc which really made it a tough year for them. I do not believe any of those children had behavior problems or any sort of disability... I just think maybe they were too young and needed the extra year to grow. Most of my classes were 5 going into kindergarten. The few 4's were about to turn 5 but still a huge difference in January birthdays and November birthdays. So don't beat yourself up... he is just young and needs a little time. You are doing everything right! Kindergarten screenings aren't until the spring... it is still early in the year! See how he does and what your comfort level is and then make the decision! If you have any questions or concerns... feel free to ask! Based on what your saying though it seems like evaluating him is not necessary... he is so young and seems to just need more time/experience in the classroom so he can learn the dynamics of what it is to be in school. He will get it... hang in there! Sorry if I rambled... I am writing this with my 3 month old on my lap lol!
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| Posted 12/2/10 12:36 PM |
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CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(
Member since 5/05 13848 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
I think all those things sound perfectly normal for a child his age(my DD is only a few months younger). She only recently starting getting her letters and this is with constant work on this at her preschool. She is not the greatest listener and in fact, can also act like she doesn't care when disciplined. She recently made a younger kid cry when she told her she wouldn't play with her and when the teacher reprimanded her, she and her friend were laughing and making faces at each other
You are SO not a bad mom- I just think he is your average super smart 4 year old
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| Posted 12/2/10 12:43 PM |
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Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn
Member since 5/05 27567 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
more and more I am hanging out with past and present teachers who are now moms and place very little emphasis on letters/numbers...very much into their kids just having fun.
I think boys come in so many forms. I find women to fit in molds so much easier then men.
He just turned 4...I would tell him the teacher said to calm down and leave it at that.
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| Posted 12/2/10 1:34 PM |
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sweetie101
you make me smile :o)
Member since 5/08 4419 total posts
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
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| Posted 12/2/10 1:50 PM |
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LoveBeingMrsT
Love my Boys!
Member since 12/05 4648 total posts
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
he sounds typical 4 yr old to me.have u tried leap frog letter factory dvd? my then 2 1/2 yr old learned his letters and sounds from watching it several times. he usually doesn't watch tv so it was a big treat so he never minded watching it several times. it's pretty cute and i still put it on for him a year later if it seems he needs a refresher. without the dvd he could care less about letters wheni tries to work with him. i just got the number dvd bc he could care less about that too.
try not to worry.
Message edited 12/2/2010 3:33:41 PM.
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| Posted 12/2/10 3:32 PM |
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Twins98
LIF Infant
Member since 8/08 243 total posts
Name:
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
I went through the same thing with one of my twin boys. He was/is a daydreamer in class and had focusing problems. He learned things in a different pace than my other son but ALL children are different. Now he will be 13 and has an 85 average. it all gets better.
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| Posted 12/2/10 4:10 PM |
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twicethefun
Loving life
Member since 7/06 4088 total posts
Name:
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
Posted by nferrandi
He actually just turned 4, so he's in his second year of pre school. I asked if she was concerned he may not go into Kindergarten next year and she said he was too smart to be held back. But that his focus issues may be a problem next year.
I have to be honest...I do not think he preschool teacher knows what she is doing...They teach letters in kindergarten. He does not NEED to know them now. I hate when preschool teachers think that preparing them for kindergarten means actually doing the kindergarten curriculum. That just makes kindergarten boring and a child frustrated. Maybe if the teacher is more appropriate, creative and fun, your child would listen...as developmentally appropriate. I am not saying some children don't have legit behavior issues, but some children do get services just because they have a rotten teacher. I know...I am a SEIT.
BTW my son did not learn al his letters until kindergarten...could not even write his name. He reads beautifully in first grade. His handwriting shines like the rest of his peers.
Message edited 12/3/2010 6:36:48 AM.
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| Posted 12/3/10 6:33 AM |
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PrincessP
Big sister!!!!!!!!!!
Member since 12/05 17450 total posts
Name:
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
Posted by nrthshgrl
You're only a crappy mom if you didn't care about this stuff and ignored the possibilty of there being real issues.
Also - keep in mind the quote : Well-behaved women never make history. Same applies for the boys.
like your spin on things Barb! That was good!
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| Posted 12/3/10 7:06 AM |
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nferrandi
too excited for words
Member since 10/05 18538 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
Posted by twicethefun
Posted by nferrandi
He actually just turned 4, so he's in his second year of pre school. I asked if she was concerned he may not go into Kindergarten next year and she said he was too smart to be held back. But that his focus issues may be a problem next year.
I have to be honest...I do not think he preschool teacher knows what she is doing...They teach letters in kindergarten. He does not NEED to know them now. I hate when preschool teachers think that preparing them for kindergarten means actually doing the kindergarten curriculum. That just makes kindergarten boring and a child frustrated. Maybe if the teacher is more appropriate, creative and fun, your child would listen...as developmentally appropriate. I am not saying some children don't have legit behavior issues, but some children do get services just because they have a rotten teacher. I know...I am a SEIT.
BTW my son did not learn al his letters until kindergarten...could not even write his name. He reads beautifully in first grade. His handwriting shines like the rest of his peers.
Thank you for that. I actually like that academics are pushed in the class, but you are probably right. They are only going reteach/reinforce these things next year, so no need to stress it now. As for his teacher, I can't really knock her. They do tons of cool projects in class, I know that DS can be difficult and it's not like she can ignore the rest of the class to cater to him all the time- though I know for a fact she does sometimes. He's just a touch cookie.
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| Posted 12/3/10 9:52 AM |
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DC HJJ M
Member since 8/07 3732 total posts
Name:
Crystal
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Re: had my parent-teacher conference today
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| Posted 12/3/10 9:57 AM |
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