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Cruisin
LIF Infant
Member since 2/16 253 total posts
Name:
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Thanksgiving Class Parties
Thoughts?
4th grade, no Halloween party, no Thanksgiving party... I get it, I really do. They are a bit old for that (on top of the 26 birthday celebrations they have for each child, it’s a lot). I understand and I’m okay with it, really.
Today, my son comes home and says the kids in RISE (gifted and talented type program) had a Thanksgiving party. It’s about 5 kids from each class go to the library 3 times a week for 1 period. It’s not fair to the other 4th graders that the RISE kids get a party and they don’t. (Not my first issue with what the RISE teacher does and how it’s not fair to the mainstream kids hence me being taken back yet again.)
I don’t understand how the principal could approve such a thing. I plan on asking him his thoughts on it on Monday.
Am I crazy or is this not fair? Sometimes I feel so alone in my thoughts when it comes to fairness.
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Posted 11/21/18 4:10 PM  |
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Katareen
5,000 Posts!
Member since 4/10 7179 total posts
Name:
Katherine
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Thanksgiving Class Parties
I don’t think any of my kids have ever had a Thanksgiving party beyond preschool—so I don’t think I would make an issue out of it. Every teacher runs their class differently and by fourth grade, kids should know that not everybody gets everything. (And I know this isn’t a separate class but my opinion still applies)
My daughter is annoyed that some of the teachers in her grade allow gum chewing, some give extra recess on Fridays, some don’t give HW every day...she just happens to have a very strict teacher this year and it is what it is.
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| Posted 11/21/18 4:38 PM |
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Cruisin
LIF Infant
Member since 2/16 253 total posts
Name:
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Re: Thanksgiving Class Parties
Thanks for your thoughts! In our school grades have parties (including Thanksgiving) thru 3rd grade. And grade level teachers (2 per grade) are encouraged to work together and do the same things. It’s a pretty level playing field in that regard. It just makes me sad that the kids have to sit through the juice boxes and cupcakes being brought into class today that’s not for them because in reality their scores were not high enough to be in the pull out group that has a party. I should mention, this was a during the school day party, not an after school thing. Ugh
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| Posted 11/21/18 4:50 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54917 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Thanksgiving Class Parties
My DD is in 3rd grade and had a huge Thanksgiving feast today.... they had parents volunteer to make everything from mashed potatoes to corn bread, to actual turkey.
Plus a lot of other treats and some crafts.
It was great.
In terms of them letting some kids have a party and not others- that is total bullshitt imo
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| Posted 11/21/18 5:15 PM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination
Member since 5/05 4430 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Thanksgiving Class Parties
It is a separate pull out class that is doing the party. It has nothing to do with you or your child. I assume they had the party when they were pulled into a separate location so the kids were not eating their cupcakes and juiceboxes in front of the other kids. If the RISE teacher wants to celebrate then that is fine. It's her choice. My daughter is in 6th and in a self contained class as well as mainstreamed. Her self contained class had a party and the mainstreamed class did not. It is the same thing. If anyone complained that she was enjoying herself in her other class, I would have laughed at them.
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| Posted 11/21/18 5:40 PM |
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amac27
LIF Toddler
Member since 8/09 471 total posts
Name:
A
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Re: Thanksgiving Class Parties
Posted by KarenK122
It is a separate pull out class that is doing the party. It has nothing to do with you or your child. I assume they had the party when they were pulled into a separate location so the kids were not eating their cupcakes and juiceboxes in front of the other kids. If the RISE teacher wants to celebrate then that is fine. It's her choice. My daughter is in 6th and in a self contained class as well as mainstreamed. Her self contained class had a party and the mainstreamed class did not. It is the same thing. If anyone complained that she was enjoying herself in her other class, I would have laughed at them.
While I somewhat agree with you, the OP said that the other children brought their juice boxes and cupcakes into the classroom where the children who did not get a party were. I feel that it makes it kinda cruel when the children who were excluded see the others with the party food that they were not allowed to have.
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| Posted 11/21/18 7:18 PM |
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Thanksgiving Class Parties
I don’t see anything wrong with this. Would you be saying the same thing if they did the same thing in a resource room?
I doubt the kids were flaunting their juice and cupcakes.
Message edited 11/21/2018 8:18:01 PM.
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| Posted 11/21/18 8:17 PM |
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ap123
LIF Infant
Member since 10/10 268 total posts
Name:
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Re: Thanksgiving Class Parties
Posted by mommywantsababy
I don’t see anything wrong with this. Would you be saying the same thing if they did the same thing in a resource room?
I doubt the kids were flaunting their juice and cupcakes.
I totally agree. And for every parent that faults the teacher for not having a party, you’d have one that would complain about wasting class time if she did have a party. Can’t please everyone.
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| Posted 11/21/18 8:23 PM |
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MrsT809
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 12167 total posts
Name:
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Thanksgiving Class Parties
I think by 4th grade the kids need to be able to deal with it. Life's not always fair, everyone doesn't always get the same thing. As long as the other kids weren't going out of their way to tease the others then it's not a big deal to me and I'd tell my kid to get over it.
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| Posted 11/21/18 9:17 PM |
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PatsBrat
LIF Adult
Member since 10/06 2326 total posts
Name:
Ms. Brat
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Re: Thanksgiving Class Parties
Let's make up our minds. Are we accepting differences or do we all need to be stepford wives? You can't have it both ways. Generally speaking, I'm sure your child isn't lacking fun or cupcakes. Let it go. Not everything is "fair" or "equal," just like in life. The sooner we learn that lesson the happier and more content we are.
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| Posted 11/21/18 11:33 PM |
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Cruisin
LIF Infant
Member since 2/16 253 total posts
Name:
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Thanksgiving Class Parties
Thank you all for your perspectives, very helpful! Have a wonderful and Happy Thanksgiving!
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| Posted 11/22/18 5:33 AM |
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ali120206
2 Boys
Member since 7/06 17789 total posts
Name:
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Thanksgiving Class Parties
It’s odd that only one group had a party but i wouldn’t be upset.
Our school does the big feast - the cafeteria services prepare the food and parents serve. It’s for K-4.
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| Posted 11/23/18 9:50 PM |
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Re: Thanksgiving Class Parties
I don’t see it as a big deal. Maybe the RISE teacher did something in depth about Thanksgiving in her curriculum and this was the culmination of the activity.
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| Posted 11/25/18 11:57 AM |
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Re: Thanksgiving Class Parties
Posted by KarenK122
It is a separate pull out class that is doing the party. It has nothing to do with you or your child. I assume they had the party when they were pulled into a separate location so the kids were not eating their cupcakes and juiceboxes in front of the other kids. If the RISE teacher wants to celebrate then that is fine. It's her choice. My daughter is in 6th and in a self contained class as well as mainstreamed. Her self contained class had a party and the mainstreamed class did not. It is the same thing. If anyone complained that she was enjoying herself in her other class, I would have laughed at them.
100% agree. My son was in the same class setting in elementary and sometimes they did stuff in the mainstream class and sometimes they did stuff in the special ed class and sometimes in both.
It has nothing to do with the OP's child. In my experience, a 4th grader is not thinking about their scores and why they didn't get into an accelerated program. That's just silly. MAYBE they're annoyed they don't get juice and cupcakes, but like another poster said, I'm sure that they get to celebrate some other things.
Unfortunately, life is not fair. Kids need to learn that in small doses. This being one of them.
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| Posted 11/26/18 1:18 PM |
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TreAnt427
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Member since 8/06 8652 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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Re: Thanksgiving Class Parties
Life isn't fair and there are worse things to worry about then a school party in the grand scheme of things.
Kids need to learn to go with the flow and not get upset about everything. If the adults don't make a big deal out of it, neither will the kids.
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| Posted 11/26/18 1:44 PM |
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mrsrainbow
LIF Adult
Member since 1/17 1465 total posts
Name:
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Thanksgiving Class Parties
I know this is already past but just to offer another perspective, is the issue REALLY with cupcakes and juice or is defense that the child isn't in the gifted program? And did the child mention it like they were upset and distraught over it or in passing? I think we as parents make things a way bigger deal than the children...
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| Posted 11/28/18 1:55 PM |
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