Perhaps it was all the diet soda I drank tonight. Whatever the reason here I am. I don't really know what I am doing here but I really have nothing else to occupy my time. I tried catching up on the DVR. I also tried reading. I think that only made matters worse. I was catching up on the Baby Solution. Reading all about IVF if we indeed do have to go down that road. I am so anxious for this process to be over with and yet I am pretty scared. I am scared that I have waited all this time to get pregnant and after all of this something will go wrong. I am scared that I will lose the pregnancy. I am even more scared that all of this manipulation will result in some sort of abnormality. I then began thinking about what it would be like to be pregnant and feel pregnant. As much as I want children I am honestly not looking forward to pregnancy. Something tells me that it will not suit me DH and I disagree on whether we will find out the sex. I want to be surprised he is desparate to know. We made the compromise that if we get pregnant with one we won't find out but if it is two we will. Either way I say I win I don't know why I am putting the cart before the horse. This is the sort of thing that happens when your mind is racing and you can't get to bed.Perhaps some Tyra will help me get to sleep....
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