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What age would you trust your kids to…

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Lucky09
2017!

Member since 1/06

7537 total posts

Name:
DW

What age would you trust your kids to…

What age would you trust your kids to wake up on their own (set their own alarm), get dressed, eat breakfast and walk to the bus stop 5 houses down (our street is fairly busy and doesn’t have sidewalks if that matters)? No one would be home if they miss the bus or if anything else came up.

I’m interviewing for a new position which will require me to be out of the house by 7am. My kids don’t wake until 7:45am. DH feels they can be left alone and “trusted” to make it to school. Wondering what age others would trust their kids to do this routine.

Posted 1/10/24 11:22 PM
 
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drpepper318
MIR MIR MIR!

Member since 6/07

8274 total posts

Name:
me

Re: What age would you trust your kids to…

My first thought was Never lol.
I’ll change my answer to college freshman.

Posted 1/10/24 11:55 PM
 

nycbuslady
LIF Adult

Member since 9/15

1066 total posts

Name:

What age would you trust your kids to…

I would say Middle School? But, I would still call them to make sure they have woken up. And, breakfast would have to only be cereal or toast. I'm assuming they're not making bacon and eggs!

Why don't you have them start now, while someone is still home? Let them set their alarm and get ready on their own and see what happens.

In case they miss the bus, is there a neighbor nearby that can drive them to school?

Posted 1/11/24 7:14 AM
 

busymomonli
Resident Insomniac

Member since 4/13

2051 total posts

Name:

What age would you trust your kids to…

It really depends on the child for me. My daughter started doing this on her own beginning in 5th grade. On the flip side, I could not trust my son to get up on his own until college. He's a really heavy sleeper and would just sleep through anything in those teen years. If I was not here, he would just miss school.

ETA: our high school bus came at 6:30. How old are your kids and what time does their school start?

Message edited 1/11/2024 7:23:39 AM.

Posted 1/11/24 7:22 AM
 

ali120206
2 Boys

Member since 7/06

17792 total posts

Name:

What age would you trust your kids to…

My kids are 14 and almost 12. I trust the almost 12 year old, the 14 year old not so much lol (although the 12 year old would prob wake him). So like the PP, it depends on the kid.

This morning, I woke my 14 year old up for extra help and I was waiting for him to come down and get his stuff together and he was laying in bed on his phone so even when I am here, he could be late.


Posted 1/11/24 8:27 AM
 

lululu
LIF Adult

Member since 7/05

9511 total posts

Name:

Re: What age would you trust your kids to…

I think that from 12 on they could do this if they had to. I get up to make sure my son is up and out the door but he could do it himself for the past couple of years easily (he just turned 16). My 11 year old essentially does this with me home. She likes to get up early to have ipad time so she sets an alarm for 7, then gets herself dressed and we walk to the bus. I make her a waffle but she could easily do this herself if she had to.

Like PP suggested I would have them start doing it now before it is absolutely necessary.

Posted 1/11/24 10:43 AM
 

StaceyWill
It's a girl!!!

Member since 6/10

21539 total posts

Name:
Stacey

What age would you trust your kids to…

Like everyone's saying, it depends on the kid, but I would say high school. My DD is 11 and she sets her alarm, makes herself breakfast, gets dressed, etc. BUT, if I'm not going into her room asking her if she's ready - she'd always be late. She lollygags. LOL.

Posted 1/11/24 2:16 PM
 

MrsO
Big Brothers to Be

Member since 1/07

4521 total posts

Name:
Maureen

Re: What age would you trust your kids to…

I would say never, if you have to do it I would have them get up and have breakfast before you leave and then they can leave for the bus whatever time they need to

Posted 1/11/24 3:46 PM
 

LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!

Member since 5/05

19460 total posts

Name:
L

Re: What age would you trust your kids to…

My kids are in high school. We are still their alarm, but they get up, get, dressed, do all morning activities, walk out the door and wait for the bus. On really cold, raining, or snowing mornings I will wait with them in my car.

Posted 1/11/24 9:13 PM
 

Lucky09
2017!

Member since 1/06

7537 total posts

Name:
DW

What age would you trust your kids to…

Thanks for all the replies. They are 14 and 13 and their schools start at 8:45am. My 13 year old gets up mostly on his own now, but my 14 year old struggles even with me yelling at him to wake up.

Would it be ridiculous to hire someone to come to my house each morning? I’m worried they might leave the garage or front door open or what might happen if my dog got out… DH definitely thinks I’m being crazy.

Message edited 1/11/2024 9:58:11 PM.

Posted 1/11/24 9:56 PM
 

nycbuslady
LIF Adult

Member since 9/15

1066 total posts

Name:

Re: What age would you trust your kids to…

Posted by Lucky09

Thanks for all the replies. They are 14 and 13 and their schools start at 8:45am. My 13 year old gets up mostly on his own now, but my 14 year old struggles even with me yelling at him to wake up.

Would it be ridiculous to hire someone to come to my house each morning? I’m worried they might leave the garage or front door open or what might happen if my dog got out… DH definitely thinks I’m being crazy.




You could hire someone, but for that age kids it seems unnecessary. Ask your kids -- they may surprise you and actually want the independence! They may feel embarassed to have a babysitter at their ages. Since they have each other, I think they'll be fine.

Posted 1/12/24 7:23 AM
 

windyweather21
LIF Adult

Member since 3/21

6980 total posts

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Re: What age would you trust your kids to…

Middle school and I see the ages below and definitely they need to start at those ages.

I don't get people saying college or never. You can't just start having them do it that late. Each year they need to start doing a little bit more things to be independent in life. This is our job to teach them and not just do everything for them.

Posted 1/12/24 8:41 AM
 

PitterPatter11
Baby Boy is Here!

Member since 5/11

7619 total posts

Name:
Momma <3

What age would you trust your kids to…

Definitely by middle school. In 6th grade, I set my own alarm and got everything ready for myself.

My son is in 4th now and I definitely enable him too much, but his executive functioning is still developing. We have Alexa alarms that remind him 20 mins before the bus comes to get dressed, 10 mins before to brush his teeth and 5 mins before to put on his shoes. This works well as I am at work and my husband is on work calls. My son is an early riser (6-6:15am) so we’ve only had to wake him a handful of times in his life.

Posted 1/13/24 1:41 PM
 

MrsWoods
LIF Adult

Member since 4/12

1461 total posts

Name:

What age would you trust your kids to…

Depends on the kid. If their not mature enough to handle any of that then it doesn't matter what age.

Posted 1/15/24 7:38 PM
 

lpg21
LIF Infant

Member since 9/21

342 total posts

Name:

Re: What age would you trust your kids to…

Really depends on the kid and their maturity level but I would say HS.

Posted 1/18/24 12:37 PM
 

MrsA1012
love my little girl !

Member since 9/10

5777 total posts

Name:
Me

What age would you trust your kids to…

Possibly highschool, but I don't know.

Posted 1/19/24 6:31 PM
 

Adri
Joy!

Member since 5/05

3116 total posts

Name:
A

Re: What age would you trust your kids to…

DS only did it that last fall when he started college; but, to be fair, it was because I was always on top of him waking him up, helping getting things ready, etc. I think if I didn't he would have done it by himself.

Posted 1/20/24 8:52 PM
 

Christine2
LIF Adult

Member since 2/09

1217 total posts

Name:

Re: What age would you trust your kids to…

Definitely high school, but I would say middle school should work also, by 6th or 7th grade. I ask my oldest (middle school) to pick up my youngest (elementary) off the bus.

I would invest in WYZE cameras and a RING doorbell so you can monitor also. You can check to see if she/he woke up. Maybe put a reminder on your phone to check on them. You can see if they have left the house on time. You can even do a scheduled text to remind them.

The bus is a tricky situation. On rare occasion they are late or may not show. Do you live close enough for him/her to walk? Is there a friend that can be "on call?" Or better yet, is there a mom of a friend that always drives their kid to school who wouldn't mind picking him/her up? I would want to have a last minute emergency plan in case the child misses the bus.

BTW, training kids early to be self sufficient is one of the best things a parent can do!

Message edited 1/20/2024 9:34:25 PM.

Posted 1/20/24 9:33 PM
 

schmora15
LIF Adult

Member since 9/08

2476 total posts

Name:

What age would you trust your kids to…

Definitely depends on the kid. My 9th grader has been getting up unprompted and out the door on time with out issue did 3 yrs. My 6th grader is a little slower in the morning but could definitely do it. I think I have to keep things moving with him more. Much more comfortable with them coming home in the afternoon then leaving in the morning.

Posted 4/8/24 10:37 PM
 
 

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