moms of 3 or more

Hi Ladies,
I have not been on for a while. I have two kids. DD is 4 and DS is now 22 months. My husband and I keep going back and forth about having a third. We wanted a larger family, but my house only has 3 bedrooms, and my job is now unstable. So, let me ask you this...when you had your 3rd how much did it change the dynamic of your family and everyday life? Some of my friends say the third child put them over the edge, or that they were outnumbered now, or that they couldn't give enough attention to all 3. Is this what you find? I get really sad at the idea of getting rid of all my baby things and moving on. But I also get sad at the idea of not being able to be divide myself fairly among my children. So, if you don't mind...please share how you felt after having your third.
I know you all LOVE and would never regret your children. Just want to see what to expect if I do decide to go for it.
Thanks,
Christy

Re: moms of 3 or more

Maybe you should just wait if youre not sure? I have 3, but one of mine is special needs and needs much more attention and has lots of doctors visits, meetings with school than normal etc. I wouldnt change anything but lets just say when people see me now they always seem to comment on how tired I look. Gee thanks LOL how do you respond to that? I AM TIRED

Re: moms of 3 or more

Took me a full 2 years to decide yes to a 3rd and I was one who always thought I wanted 3. But after 2 - I wasn't so sure. Granted my baby is only 7 mos old but I am happy we went for #3. So far it hasn't been too bad. Granted #3 gets dragged to all her older brothers activities and school stuff and has no real nap schedule. But so far so good adn no we aren't put over the edge - yet!!

Re: moms of 3 or more

Well, I always knew I wanted three, so there was no decision involved but I will tell you my experience 1 year in...

First, we also have a 3BR house. The girls share a room, DS is in the nursery. The girls love sharing...for now. Should this change, we do have a finished attic that we would consider turning into one or two bedrooms.

As a SAHM, I dislike the whole "outnumbered" thing. I guess that was true for me after DD#2 was born, but now that my DH is outnumbered as well it's a phrase? Anyway, DS was SUCH an easy baby and 3.5 years younger than his next oldest sister so I felt that when he did need the attention I could give it to him without feeling guilty. The girls had/have each other (they're 1.5 years apart). The girls were and are not jealous...they love him. Uhhhh...they show it in "different" ways, but they love him.

I am still able to have a decent schedule for #3. Occasionally, his afternoon naps are compromised if this one has Daisies or that one has art club...

OK, as for putting us over the edge... I think we've sort of hit that point THIS month (he'll be one on the 26th). DS has become quite a handful at restaurants and while out. Screaming in the booster seat or shopping cart, etc. When that happens, yeah, I feel bad we can't talk to the girls because we're singing Row Row Row Your Boat for the 20th time, but honestly, I don't think they notice. Also, this summer I felt bad that I couldn't take the girls alone to the movies or to the beach as I would have without a baby. But, that was only temporary. As you know, they grow up in the blink of an eye and we'll be hitting the beach before we know it...

It has become nuts, but I truly love it (a little wine never hurts ) and to be honest, if my DH were on board, I'd be crazy enough to have another!

Re: moms of 3 or more

How are you doing? I now have 3 and I am soooo happy that we do. My DH said 1 was enough!

Anyway, the boys are now 7.5 and 5 yrs old. DD is almost 10.5 months old. The first thing I want to say is that the boys are so in love with their baby sister. It's amazing to see them with her. They crack her up all the time and her eyes light up when she sees them. Both boys are now in Elementary school but before that the younger one was in Preschool with the baby. I work FT and my DH works FT and PT and the boys are both in sports. That means 1 practice and game each a week. And my older son is in religion on Sunday mornings. The baby does get dragged along to her brothers activities, but that's what happened to my younger son when he was a baby. That's just how it is. DD doesn't mind at all. With working and trying to make the practices, etc. is hard and trying to get everyone out of the house for the sports and the store can be difficult. And it's not the baby that's difficult, she's so laid back and happy, it's the boys that give me a hard time. They just don't listen to mommy. They take full advantage when I'm doing something "baby" and I can't fully tend to them. Some days are hard to divide my attention to all of them. Of course the baby is more needy because she is a baby and the boys accept that. Some days they're whiny and needy themselves but for the most part they're ok with it. They're really good helpers with the baby, but of course some days they're too tired. Yes we are outnumbered, lol but I woudn't change it for the world! I LOVE and so grateful for having all of my kids!

ETA: I also wanted to add that yes it does get loud in my house at times when everyone is hyper. When the boys get loud/excited with playing so does the baby, she loves it. But she also gets loud with the crying when the boys are fighting or crying themselves.

The one thing that's hard everyday is bedtime. OMG... the baby seems to always be ready for bed when it's time for the boys to go to bed. Again the boys take advantage of that to the fullest! I just can't get them to stay in bed. We're working on the bedtime routine because it's hard with all the running around after work we have to do.

We also live in a 3BR/2.5BA house. The boys had their own rooms up until a couple of months before the baby came. They now share a room with bunkbeds which they love and the baby has her own room.

ETA again: As Eireann said, If my DH was on board, I'd probably be crazy enough to go for #4!!! But that's not going to happen...

Message edited 10/7/2011 8:40:27 AM.

Re: moms of 3 or more

Bump for Beachgirl...

Re: moms of 3 or more

We have a 3bed, 1 bath house and 3 kids. I thought having the third really didn't change anything.
Yes our house is small, but bigger families have done just fine with a lot less. Maybe somewhere down the road we will add on to our house, or maybe buy a new one. But right now I knew I wanted the third and couldn't wait to see if that might happen.
I love having 3. Would have a 4th but I do think that would push us over the edge in this house.

ETA: I have 2.5 year old twins and a 7 month old. My twins were 26 months when the baby was born.

Message edited 10/7/2011 12:58:07 PM.

Re: moms of 3 or more

3 bedrooms 2 bathrooms and 3 kids. I always wanted 3 or 4 children.

Honestly, going from 1 to 2 kids was HARD, going from 2 to 3 was a piece of cake.