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Grrrr..... Am I being unreasonable...

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05mommy09
Family of 5!

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Grrrr..... Am I being unreasonable...

Message edited 5/25/2006 9:58:19 PM.

Posted 5/6/06 10:30 AM
 
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

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Re: Grrrr..... Am I being unreasonable...

Nope you're not being unreasonable at all. You're putting more effort in to seeing ILs than most people I know. Do not change your schedule if you're happy with it.

It doesn't sound like your FIL is complaining. It sounds like your MIL is the one upset? Tell her that if FIL wants to see Ryan more, that he can call you directly to make those arrangements. At one point, I would just say to FIL in front of MIL, "are you ok with our arrangement?" because it sounds like he's fine with it.

Maybe, he has his attention on other things - and she thinks by getting him to care more about Ryan, he cares about "family" and through association her???

Posted 5/6/06 10:42 AM
 

monkeybride
My Everything

Member since 5/05

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Re: Grrrr..... Am I being unreasonable...

No I don't think you're being unreasonable. I think MIL's expectations are too high. What about all the grandparents that live no where near their grandchildren. She should be grateful for the time they do get with him and that he is so close by.
IMO I think it is very important to have family time that is just you DH and baby. We pretty much have the same rule with my mom and even though she gets lonely on the weekends (she's divorced) she accepts it.
If we have nothing going on or DH is busy with other things I will make plans to see her one of the weekend days but she knows this is our family time because the weeknights are just too hectic.
I would totally stand your ground on this one and DH needs to back you up.
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Posted 5/6/06 10:44 AM
 

JennyGirl
LIF Adolescent

Member since 4/06

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Jennifer

Re: Grrrr..... Am I being unreasonable...

I don't think you are being unreasonable. MIL should not use guilt against you- it sounds like you are really making an effort. I thought having close in-laws was great- until I had my DD. All of a sudden everyone was competing for time with us. In the beginning we indulged them, but not anymore. (Being a mom really gave me a little sense of power!) We see them either once a week or week and 1/2. Also I use her nap schedule as a good excuse not to vist too long- that way I don't "waste" a whole day. You really need DH to show some support and let all the grandparents know that you need time as a family- just the 3 of you. Good luck.Chat Icon

Posted 5/6/06 11:28 AM
 

05mommy09
Family of 5!

Member since 5/05

15364 total posts

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<3 Mommy <3

Re: Grrrr..... Am I being unreasonable...

Message edited 5/25/2006 9:58:29 PM.

Posted 5/6/06 2:39 PM
 

dottiemchugh
<3

Member since 5/05

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Re: Grrrr..... Am I being unreasonable...

Not at all. My In laws only see Ryan for Sunday night dinner for about 2 hours. Your MIL just seems to never be satisfied with how much she gets to see him. Even if she saw him everyday that wouldnt be enough.. she would request longer days! She needs to understand that you guys need your alone time to spend together. Chat Icon

Posted 5/6/06 4:24 PM
 

Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn

Member since 5/05

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Janice

Re: Grrrr..... Am I being unreasonable...

can I ask a slightly off topic question? How often did your DH see his father's mother?

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all. What did she do with her time before baby RJ?

Posted 5/6/06 5:51 PM
 

05mommy09
Family of 5!

Member since 5/05

15364 total posts

Name:
<3 Mommy <3

Re: Grrrr..... Am I being unreasonable...

Posted by Janice

can I ask a slightly off topic question? How often did your DH see his father's mother?

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all. What did she do with her time before baby RJ?




hardly ever!!!!

Posted 5/6/06 5:53 PM
 

Tracey
***********

Member since 5/05

6297 total posts

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Tracey - brideinapril

Re: Grrrr..... Am I being unreasonable...

UNREASONABLE?????? I think you are being EXTEMELY gererous!!!!! I could never do what you are doing. It sounds like your kindness is being taken advantage of. I feel so bad for you. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon It sounds like there is no pleasing them.

Posted 5/6/06 5:58 PM
 

Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn

Member since 5/05

27567 total posts

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Janice

Re: Grrrr..... Am I being unreasonable...

Posted by Princessmaris

Posted by Janice

can I ask a slightly off topic question? How often did your DH see his father's mother?

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all. What did she do with her time before baby RJ?




hardly ever!!!!




Chat Icon good to know thanks! I think you do more then enough.

Posted 5/6/06 6:34 PM
 
 

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