Do you agree with this

My neighbor and I were talking just about kids and other bsshe is extremely opinionated ...but whatever I kind of just agree with her.....she made this comment....ya know I dont let my kids run my life not ever they came into my life I did not come into theirs...i don't know I thought that was kinda mean......what do you think

Re: Do you agree with this

i think she is kinda saying i will still have a life even though i have kids..like still lead her own life

but she says it is a douchey way

Do you agree with this

It depends on the situation, I think. Obviously it's good to have a balance and try to make some time for yourself. But kids don't come into our lives by their own choosing. It's not fair for a parent to say 'I was alive first so we have to do what I want to do' in all situations. But if she means she's not raising brats that always get what they want, then good for her.

Do you agree with this

I get what she was saying, I just think she could have said it better. My boys are my world, and they always come first in our life. BUT, I will certainly not stop being "me" because they are here. For example, while I may go out with DH and with friends less than before I had kids, I still go out and enjoy myself without my kids. I know of people who give up friends, quality time with their DH, the basic act of putting on makeup in the morning, because they center their entire universe around their kids. My universe does not center around my boys. They are a HUGE part of my life, and by far the most important (along with DH), but they are not my whole life.

Re: Do you agree with this

Do you agree with this

I agree with her. My DS does not run my life. He has joined it but I do not change my schedule based on his naps or anything like that.

SO I ubnderstand her comment. I have friends that can't leave the house because of their child's nap and feeding schedule.

Re: Do you agree with this

I understand what she meant (I think), but I really disagree with how she said it, especially the, "they came into my life" party. No, you BROUGHT them into your life.

IMO, when I chose to have a child, I chose to change a lot of my life to accommodate her needs. That said, I don't let her schedule dictate our lives.

Re: Do you agree with this

I don't necessarily agree- we choose to have ds and welcomed him into our life and to a degree that meant that we made changes to accomodate him. We still have a life outside him

I think I just don't like how she stated it

Do you agree with this

I agree with her. I always say that, he came into our world, he will adjust to how WE do things. There is give and take, but for the most part our lives do NOT revolve soley around ds. His schedule never ruled our home.

Message edited 4/22/2013 8:57:08 AM.

Re: Do you agree with this

I know a lot of parents that say, the kids adjust to our schedule. We don't revolve around their schedule.

Dh and I don't agree with that. We wanted DS , when he was born we catered to him. Our world now is all about the kids

Everyone is different , which is fine but it's the way she said it

Re: Do you agree with this

I'm a pretty direct person, and no one would accuse me of being hypersensitive .......but I there's a MUCH nicer way to have said that!!

Re: Do you agree with this

Do you agree with this

Sounds like something I would say to the T. But I do understand ppl dont get my brass attitude and I also respect that some choose to alter their life for their children. I dont judge them but I choose to live my life differently.

I actually said something like this to the day care director earlier today when I picked up my child for acting like an animal.

Re: Do you agree with this

Ha! I always said, "I'm going to have the type of kids who will have to fit into MY life, I'm not going to alter my life for my kids." Well - guess who plans everything around nap times and bed times and doesn't go to certain places because she has a 10 month old????
<----------------THIS GIRL!!!!!!!! (oh wait, no that's my kid...eh you get what I mean )

Message edited 4/22/2013 12:35:39 PM.

Re: Do you agree with this

There are people who do extremes both ways.

My kids sure HAVE changed my life. Im not going to go to bars at night... And yes... I turn down invitations because I'd rather spend time with my family. I do not plan everything around nap time... But I won't be in a restaurant at that time with them.

Your neighbor is just trying to rile you.

Do you agree with this

I agree with the sentiment but not really how it was worded.