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Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

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jams92

Member since 1/12

6105 total posts

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Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

Not sure if this was posted on here but I was laughing when I read it...it's long but I enjoyed the entire thing....


OK, here’s my situation. My Mummy has had me for almost seven months. The first few months were great. I cried, she picked me up and fed me, anytime, day or night.
Then something happened.

Over the last few weeks, she has been trying to STTN (sleep through the night). At first, I thought it was just a phase, but it is only getting worse.

I’ve talked to other babies, and it seems like its pretty common after Mummies have had us for around six months.

Here’s the thing: these Mummies don’t really need to sleep. Its just a habit. Many of them have had some 30 years to sleep and they just don’t need it anymore.
So I am implementing a plan. I call it the Crybaby Shuffle. It goes like this:

Night 1: Cry every three hours until you get fed. I know, its hard. Its hard to see your Mummy upset over your crying. Just keep reminding yourself, its for her own good.

Night 2: Cry every two hours until you get fed.

Night 3: [Cry every hour. Most Mummies will start to respond more quickly after about three nights.
Some Mummies are more alert, and may resist the change longer. These Mummies may stand in your doorway for hours, shhhh-ing.

Don’t give in. I cannot stress this enough: CONSISTENCY IS KEY!! If you let her STTN (sleep through the night), just once, she will expect it every night.
I KNOW ITS HARD! But she really doesn’t need the sleep, she’s just resisting the change.

If you have an especially alert Mummy, you can stop crying for about 10 minutes, just long enough for her to go back to bed and start to fall asleep.
Then cry again. It WILL eventually work. My Mummy once stayed awake for 10 hours straight, so I know she can do it.

Last night, I cried every hour. You just have to decide to stick to it and just go for it. BE CONSISTENT!
I cried for any reason I could come up with. My sleep sack tickled my foot. I felt a wrinkle under the sheet. My mobile made a shadow on the wall. i burped, and it tasted like pears. I hadn’t eaten pears since lunch, what’s up with that? The cat said 'meow'. I should know. My Mummy reminds me of this about 20 times a day. LOL.
Once I cried just because I liked how it sounded when it echoed on the monitor in the other room.
Too hot, too cold, just right - doesn’t matter! Keep crying!! It took awhile, but it worked.

She fed me at 4am. Tomorrow night, my goal is 3:30am. You need to slowly shorten the interval between feedings in order to reset your Mummies internal clocks.
Sometimes my Mummy will call for reinforcements by sending in Daddy.

Don’t worry, Daddies are not set up for not needing sleep the way Mummies are. They can only handle a few pats and shhing before they declare defeat and send in the Mummy.

Also, be wary of the sleep sheep with rain noises. I like to give Mummy false hope that listening to the rain puts me to sleep sometimes I pretend to close my eyes and be asleep and then wait until I know Mummy is settling back to sleep to spring a surprise cry attack.

If she doesn’t get to me fast enough I follow up with my fake cough and gag noise that always has her running to the crib.

At some point I am positive she will start to realise that she really doesn’t really need sleep.

P.S. Don’t let those rubber things fool you, no matter how long you suck on them, no milk will come out. Trust me

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Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2260815/How-stop-mummy-sleeping-night-Hilarious-Facebook-spoof-Gina-Ford-style-parenting-guides-sees-babies-plot-mothers-awake.html#ixzz2QfimdWVT
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Posted 4/16/13 7:30 PM
 
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MrsRapz
mahna mahna!

Member since 2/12

1952 total posts

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Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

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Posted 4/17/13 1:06 PM
 

stillasecret
LIF Infant

Member since 2/12

370 total posts

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Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

Too funny!

Posted 4/17/13 5:56 PM
 

newroctransplant
LIF Infant

Member since 2/09

173 total posts

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Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

hilarious!!! thank you so much for sharing!

Posted 4/17/13 6:40 PM
 

starlitdragon
Me and my love

Member since 3/13

1301 total posts

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Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

The daddy part made me laugh the hardest. Hysterical

Posted 4/17/13 6:41 PM
 

WannaBeAMom11
LIF Adult

Member since 1/11

7391 total posts

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Name

Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

That's hilarious.

Posted 4/17/13 6:45 PM
 

StaceyWill
It's a girl!!!

Member since 6/10

21539 total posts

Name:
Stacey

Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

Love this! So funny!

Posted 4/17/13 6:49 PM
 

ANR1211
My loves

Member since 2/11

2131 total posts

Name:
A

Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

LOL!

Posted 4/17/13 7:27 PM
 

LiveItUp
Love my babies!

Member since 8/11

4096 total posts

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Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

So funny!

Posted 4/17/13 7:34 PM
 

Melmel821
Love being a mom!

Member since 5/08

2776 total posts

Name:
Melanie

Re: Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

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Posted 4/17/13 7:36 PM
 

KwaaksNest
Love my boys!

Member since 6/10

2825 total posts

Name:
Samantha

Re: Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

Posted by starlitdragon

The daddy part made me laugh the hardest. Hysterical




Me too cause thats so my husband

Posted 4/17/13 9:13 PM
 

apwmjc
Love my little man

Member since 12/10

1901 total posts

Name:
Amy

Re: Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

Too funny

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Posted 4/17/13 10:14 PM
 

gina409
TWINS!

Member since 12/09

27635 total posts

Name:
g

Re: Funny sttn from a 7 month olds perspective

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Posted 4/18/13 12:33 AM
 
 

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