When did you tell family/friends?

DH & I are disagreeing as to when we should tell our families! He already called and told his sister the day we got our BFP. (Ideally I had just wanted to tell my sister the day after)

AND he's already told his Father! I told him I wanted to wait until AT LEAST our first doctor's appointment in 3 weeks in which I'll be 8 weeks 2 days before we shared the news.

So now I'm going to tell my parents this weekend although I had originally wanted to wait.

Am I being OVERLY cautious by not wanting to tell people right away?

I keep telling him this time is sensitive; and I wouldn't want to to share the news and get all excited; and then God forbid something happens! But he says that's what family/friends are for...to be there for us if we need them.

Just curious to see what everyone else did...

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

I can see both sides, IF (god forbid) something happens, yes there are certain people you'd want to lean on for support....but, at the same time it is best to wait as long as you can hold out to tell the news, at least until the 1st appointment when you feel more comfortable that everything is ok.

With our 1st pregnancy DH told EVERYONE right away, he was so excited. Since that ended in miscarriage he was much more hesitant this time around, gratefully. I couldn't deal with all the attention if something bad should happen again. So, this time around we were going to wait until 8 weeks to tell immediate family, we caved and told his family at 7 weeks and my mom & sis at 8 weeks.....and then I clued in a few close friends. Otherwise, everyone else was told at 12 weeks, and it felt good to know we were basically out of the danger zone when we shared our news!

eta: since I had spotting early on, I started having sonos at 4-5 weeks pregnant! Very early on, but at least we already heard the heart beat by 5w5d or so....it made me feel a bit more reassured to tell our families at 7/8 weeks.

Message edited 5/11/2012 11:57:27 AM.

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

With my first I told my dh and sister the day I got my bfp. My family/dh family and very close friends after the first sono (8 weeks). Coworkers 12 weeks after NT scan.


With my second the same except for coworkers i came out at 20 weeks. No clue why i waited so long LOL


Whatever you decide will be fine. God forbid something happened its nice to have supportive people in your life to get you through a loss. Everything will be fine tell when YOU feel most comfortable

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

We were planning on waiting until the first appointment at 8 weeks to share the news with our families.

Well this week we just couldn't wait any longer so we told my parents and we are telling his parents on Sunday (I am 6 weeks).

We made them promise they can't tell anyone until at least our first appointment. Then, we will probably tell close friends and then everyone else at 12 weeks.

Message edited 5/11/2012 12:02:32 PM.

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

i told my sister a couple days after my BFP

we waited to tell our parents/grandparents/other siblings/best friends until after our 8 week dr. appt

told the rest of our friends and family a little before 12 weeks

told work/rest of world after 14 weeks

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

THANKS!!

I'm really excited and I know our friends/family will be excited. And I know they'll be there for us if we need them. I just can't get past the nerves!

But maybe I should just bite the bullet and tell because being all nervous and stressing about this can't be helping me either!

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

I'm 9 weeks and we still haven't told too many people. I started spotting 2 days after getting my BFP, so I've been a bit nervous about spilling the beans. I've already been to the doctor twice and everything is looking fine, but I'm still nervous (and still spotting!).

We told my parents at 6 weeks and inlaws at 8 weeks. I told my boss at 6 weeks too, only because I had to start calling in sick and taking days off to go back and forth to the Dr (I work in the city, live in Babylon and my Dr is in Sayville. Awesome). I NEVER call in sick, so she was worried. I haven't told anyone else at work though. We haven't even told our siblings yet. If my Dr appointment on Monday goes well, we might tell the sibs then.

I still want to wait until 12 weeks to tell anyone else though, but we'll see, it's getting hard to keep this from some people.

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

I told my parents right away. Some friends too. I waited til 6 weeks with other friends. We didn't tell ILs until 9 weeks because we didn't want to get them all excited for nothing (I had spotting a few weeks before). Now I tell people here and there and we are telling his extended family this weekend. I'm still scared. I wish I had a sono for reassurance before we told them. Lol.

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

We haven't really told anyone, not even our parents yet, and I'm 8w5d. I'd be fine with announcing to our friends at this point, but DH is very superstitious and wants to wait until 12 weeks. I was able to convince him that we need to tell our parents this weekend though. Our first sono went really well, so he finally relented.

I did tell my boss this week - only because I had to schedule a bunch of appts during work hours.

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

our close fam and friends knew we did ivf so it was a question of did it work

but this is also our 4th pregnancy

after we lost the first one and had to tell everyone that we had already told we lost the baby the next 2 times we got pregnant we did not tell anyone

everyone else for this one we r waiting till 12 weeks

it is a personal decison

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

We chose to wait until after my 12 sono to tell anyone. We thought about telling close family and friends befor then, and it was really hard not to, but we were just nervous since its my first pregnancy and wanted to make sure everything was progressing normally before sharing. It is a personal decision though.

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

We told our parents and close friends at 6 weeks. We wanted them to know right away. Immediate family we told the next week (7 weeks).
I told my principal at 10 weeks (but no one else at my job knows yet).
I wanted to wait to tell "the world" (although at that point all the important people knew) until after our NT scan.

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

I've always waited until after the first trimester. At least you know the chance of miscarriage has decreased, and the nt scan is done. I have friends who waited until after their level 2 ultrasound to share with friends, but they told their families after the first trimester.

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

we got a BFP on Dec 21..
I told my BFFs who are like sisters on Dec 23...
Told our parents/siblings on Dec 24...
Told the rest of my family on Xmas & NYE...

I have a very tight knit family - so i wanted to tell them in person & i figured if something were to go wrong, theyd all be there to lean on (something that would have been hard to do if they didnt know)

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

We got our BFP Sept 11 and told parents, sibs and a few close friends that day. Told my boss the next day cause of how my job is.
Oct 1st we told the rest of the family and after that we were pretty much out!!

Re: When did you tell family/friends?

We told family and close friends after the first appt when we heard the heart beat. I held out a bit longer to tell other friends and work. Around week 12 give or take.

My thinking was if a did miscarry I would want the support of my close friends.