upset by insensitive comments

Hi ladies,
I haven't posted in a while, but someone made a very insenstivie remark on my FB last night and i just need a place to vent.

a girl, who is the daughter of my mom's best friend, that i am casual friends w/, left a message for both me and my younger brother, that one of us better hurry up and give our parents some grandkids.
it seems that my parents were at her house this week and she could tell how much they are yearning for grandkids and how great my dad looked holding her 11 month old son and her 3 yr old daughter just love my mom and calls her aunt xxx.

now, no one knows we are ttc. my mom is a huge blabber mouth, so i can't share any important secrets with her.

i know the girl didn't mean to be so insensitive, she doesn't know that we have been trying since last july.

her comments just made me really upset. i know my parents and my ILs want grandkids, but my parents don't make comments, and my ILs have learned not to.

this FB message made me . I would love to have a baby, but for whatever reason, it's taking longer than we hoped...

sigh...

sorry this was long. thank you if you read this whole thing!

Re: upset by insensitive comments

i'm sorry her comments upset you so much.....people just sometimes don't THINK before they speak....i'm amazed at how people don't understand that TTC is a PRIVATE issue that shouldln't be talked about....especially on FB!! lots of hugs to you

Re: upset by insensitive comments

I know. Lots of times people don't think before they speak.....but most of them also don't know any better. Unless they are going what we thru, which most of them don't or have not, then they don't think twice to say something that to them is not big deal but to us; hurts like Hell!

Re: upset by insensitive comments

thanks girls!

i deleted the message from my FB inbox and DH suggested I ignore it and don't reply.

my brother just replied and said "no kiddos for us now, that's my sister's department"


i'm trying not to have such a pity party b/c this month we used an OPK and i got my surge on CD14, so i know i O'd this month and we BD'd on the right days! so

Re: upset by insensitive comments

Posted by momma2b

thanks girls!

i deleted the message from my FB inbox and DH suggested I ignore it and don't reply.

my brother just replied and said "no kiddos for us now, that's my sister's department"


i'm trying not to have such a pity party b/c this month we used an OPK and i got my surge on CD14, so i know i O'd this month and we BD'd on the right days! so

Message edited 4/1/2010 3:27:40 PM.

Re: upset by insensitive comments

Just wanted to give you

Something similar happened to me - wife of DH friend posted on my FB that she had a dream i was preggo -- it was especially hard b/c we just found out that DH had no sperm so it made me

But i just deleted the comment - not much else you can do

Good luck this month

Re: upset by insensitive comments

a similar thing happened to me on monday. at DH's mom's Passover dinner, his boisterous uncle walks in the house, says hi to me, and immediately follows with "SO, are you pregnant yet?"
His daughter just gave birth to her second last week.
No one knows we are TTC so I know his comment was with the best intentions, but we are TTC 11months so it just made me .

Luckily I was quick enough to follow it up with - "No, are you?"

Re: upset by insensitive comments

I'm sorry the comment made you . You're right to ignore it. It probably wasn't meant to be harsh but people don't really get how frustrating TTC can be unless they've been there. I hope you're feeling a little better as the day goes on!

Re: upset by insensitive comments

Awwwwwww! It sounds like she meant well ( like all of those ppl who stick their noses in someone else's business). It will happen, keep up the hope!

Re: upset by insensitive comments

thanks ladies!

i do feel better about her and my brother's comments now.
thanks for letting me vent about it!

Message edited 4/1/2010 4:19:55 PM.

Re: upset by insensitive comments

You handled it a lot better than I would. I would have told her to mind her own f*kin business!!! I hate when people assume that you just don't have kids bc you don't want them, it's not that freaking simple for some of us!!!! grrr

Hang in there sweetie

Re: upset by insensitive comments

totally know how you feel!!

Re: upset by insensitive comments

Posted by babylove628

You handled it a lot better than I would. I would have told her to mind her own f*kin business!!! I hate when people assume that you just don't have kids bc you don't want them, it's not that freaking simple for some of us!!!! grrr

Hang in there sweetie

Message edited 4/1/2010 5:40:24 PM.

Re: upset by insensitive comments

Just wanted to give you a No one esle really understands and that makes it really hard.

Re: upset by insensitive comments

I'm so sorry this person sent you a message like this! People need to think BEFORE they speak (or type). I'm sure she thought she was helping, but... Good for you for deleting it!