Is anyone planning on having just one child?

DH and I were talking last night and I was telling him I hope my next pregnancy goes more smoothly. He looked surprised and asked you really want another one and I told him I always thought I would have 2. Since DH has 2 children (16 and 14) from a previous relationship he thought he was done and happy with having 3. In his eyes I am a mother to his children so my idea of what our family would be should be complete.

Is anyone else in a similar position as me? Or do you have another reason why you want to be a 1 child family?

Message edited 3/11/2010 11:12:10 AM.

Re: Is anyone planning on having just one child?

my sister was in a similar position to you. Her DH has 2 boys, they had a girl together and another boy 15 months after the girl! They will not be having any more (he got the surgery).

Your totally right to want 2 of your own, his kids are older and will be moving out and I'm sure you want a sibling closer in age for your child. I would explain to him, maybe he'd understand and agree to one more.

Re: Is anyone planning on having just one child?

I am in a similar position. DH has a child from a previous relationship who is 13. SS has developmental issues and DHs nephew has Down Syndrome, DH did not want to have anymore children because he has a very real fear of having another child with disabilities. Before we got married we agreed to have one, this was a compromise for each of us.

I would like to have another, because I would really like DS to have a sibling close in age; when DS enters kindergarten SS will be 18. Part of me is happy with one child, but part of me is sad about it. I am not resentful towards DH, this is something we decided together, there are just times I really worry about DS growing up and being lonely.

Re: Is anyone planning on having just one child?

We are most likely only having one.
It took me a long time (8 years of marriage) to even decide if I wanted children at all.

My reason for only wanting one is the following:

I will be 36 when my DD arrives.

Our house is TINY and we'd have to put on a very expensive extension to even consider another child.

I am very career oriented and plan to go right back to work. I don't think daycare/childcare for 2 children would fit our budget.

I am not sure I can even handle one child- much less 2. I'm scared to death of the lifestyle change one will bring.

I really don't relish being pregnant and doubt I will want to EVER do this again.

Re: Is anyone planning on having just one child?

Q-

I seriously debated having only one child. I loved having Aidan and couldn't imagine another child as great as him. Not to mention the finances and the fact that our house is tiny.

While that didn't last long ( ), the decision for a second child was made for me. After struggling with IF, I got pregnant totally by chance and wasn't expecting it.

I know that I am not in the same situation as you, but you are right to want to have another child of your own. ALthough your child will have 2 siblings, they will be far apart in age. You are absolutely a mother to his children but that doesn't mean you can't have your own view of what your family should look like. I say talk to him and let him know that you don't quite share his view of family. See where it goes from there.

Re: Is anyone planning on having just one child?

One Husband
one baby
one dog


That's me!

Re: Is anyone planning on having just one child?

Re: Is anyone planning on having just one child?

Re: Is anyone planning on having just one child?

I could go either way. I would really like a girl and have someone for ds to play with all the time but I think i will be happy with just one.