Re: Vent: my mom bought my son..

Posted by KateDevine

Posted by MrsRbk



Wow....

First of all, no one is saying because it took Jen a long time to conceive that she has a "pass" when it comes to "whining" KateDevine said she didn't see what the big deal was, so I told her, that Jen waited a long time for this. And THAT was the big deal to HER.

I just want to say something here in my OWN defense, I quoted someone and I was not mean or nasty, I said *I* didn't see what the big deal was, and you really seem to have a bug up your butt for me!!

I was not being nasty to the OP, and like I said, I am truly sorry she is upset!

And I do still wish that someone would buy DS' costume this year like they have the past couple of years

Re: Vent: my mom bought my son..

Posted by MrsRbk

Posted by KateDevine

Posted by MrsRbk



Wow....

First of all, no one is saying because it took Jen a long time to conceive that she has a "pass" when it comes to "whining" KateDevine said she didn't see what the big deal was, so I told her, that Jen waited a long time for this. And THAT was the big deal to HER.

I just want to say something here in my OWN defense, I quoted someone and I was not mean or nasty, I said *I* didn't see what the big deal was, and you really seem to have a bug up your butt for me!!

I was not being nasty to the OP, and like I said, I am truly sorry she is upset!

And I do still wish that someone would buy DS' costume this year like they have the past couple of years

Don't flatter yourself... I do not have a bug up my butt for you..... I was explaining to Snickers that nobody said she should have a pass to whine. I was only merely explaining way back on page 1, that it was a big deal to Jen and WHY it was a big deal to Jen. I never said you were being nasty to the OP either, if you took it that way, that's your issue.

I will say this for the 3rd time in this thread. Jen was not looking for opinions, she was lookiing for some hugs and support as a new mom.

I have to say, I'm starting to agree with monkeybride, that this board is really starting to suck lately.

Re: Vent: my mom bought my son..

My mom or mil never did that but I would be upset as well.

Re: Vent: my mom bought my son..

Posted by Snickers

IMO, it doesn't matter what the OP's "intentions' were, but by posting that she was annoyed or upset or whatever wording she used (too lazy too go back and look) by someone going out of their way to purchase gifts for her child is absolutely ungrateful and kind of spoiled, again this is in my humble opinion/

And for those who are saying that it took the OP so long to have her child and she should be entitled to have these feelings, well, i agree. The OP can feel whatever way she wants to. But remember, it took us ALL a long time to have our first children. It took me 32 years, in fact. I don't think those that had a harder time conceiving get a "pass" when it comes to whining. Sorry if it sounds harsh.

And when you come on a public board to vent about your frustration about your child's grandparent's buying him or her gifts, it might strike a chord with some other posters. They have a right to vent their feelings about the subject posted as well.

I hope the OP finds the perfect Halloween costume for her DC and that all end up well.





Edited: Typing errors...

Re: Vent: my mom bought my son..

nevermind - misread

Message edited 9/6/2009 11:10:12 AM.

Re: Vent: my mom bought my son..

Posted by Mikismom

Posted by KateDevine

Posted by MrsRbk



Wow....

First of all, no one is saying because it took Jen a long time to conceive that she has a "pass" when it comes to "whining" KateDevine said she didn't see what the big deal was, so I told her, that Jen waited a long time for this. And THAT was the big deal to HER.

I just want to say something here in my OWN defense, I quoted someone and I was not mean or nasty, I said *I* didn't see what the big deal was, and you really seem to have a bug up your butt for me!!

I was not being nasty to the OP, and like I said, I am truly sorry she is upset!

And I do still wish that someone would buy DS' costume this year like they have the past couple of years

the person you quoted (mrs rbk) was not talking to you with her post, she was talking to snickers.

Re: Vent: my mom bought my son..

Posted by KateDevine

Posted by Mikismom

Posted by KateDevine

Posted by MrsRbk



Wow....

First of all, no one is saying because it took Jen a long time to conceive that she has a "pass" when it comes to "whining" KateDevine said she didn't see what the big deal was, so I told her, that Jen waited a long time for this. And THAT was the big deal to HER.

I just want to say something here in my OWN defense, I quoted someone and I was not mean or nasty, I said *I* didn't see what the big deal was, and you really seem to have a bug up your butt for me!!

I was not being nasty to the OP, and like I said, I am truly sorry she is upset!

And I do still wish that someone would buy DS' costume this year like they have the past couple of years

the person you quoted (mrs rbk) was not talking to you with her post, she was talking to snickers.

Yes, but my name was mentioned one to many times for my liking

Re: Vent: my mom bought my son..

honestly, it would bug me too. Yes, we get plenty of firsts, but we are the moms and we should be able to buy the halloween, easter, whatever outfit without guilt from grandparents.

It does get frustrating and I can see why the OP was venting.

Welcome to the boards Jen!

I don't know why there is a debate over your vent (except it's LIF & we all like to debate everything) & to say you are spoiled is out of line & completely uncalled for.

It is narrow minded to tell someone that you should be grateful. We all have different relationships with our relatives. I'd like to think that we are open-minded enough to realize that while we may not have a grandparent that is involved in our child's life, you can all still imagine being excited about buying a costume & to have someone give you a costume that you didn't really want. It doesn't mean the OP doesn't appreciate her mom, but she doesn't appreciate the gesture. If you're a person that doesn't care about firsts, you can still imagine something important to you & then to have someone interfere in it.

Jen - she didn't buy him his first Halloween costume. . The choice is yours. Always remember that.

Message edited 9/2/2011 10:57:59 AM.

Re: Vent: my mom bought my son..

Re: Vent: my mom bought my son..

Posted by Bops

Not sure how this will come out, but hopefully it comes across as intended

Both my parents have passed away
( before I was 23 actually) I loved them both with all of my heart and would do anything to have them back...Niether of them had the opportunity to know let alone meet either of my children and they both would have adored and spoiled them to pieces....

With that having been said, I would never have allowed my mother to pick and out and buy my DC their first anything holiday related ! To me this is something very special, something that I always dreamed of doing( going shopping for my DD's 1st Christmas dress etc...) IMO, my parents had the option to pick out mine and my brothers Halloween, Christmas, Easter 1sts...Maybe they did, maybe they didn't , they are not here to ask , but that was their choice....

If my mom wanted to go with me to help choose, that would have been awesome, but for a grandparent to take it upon themself, although a sweet gesture would not be okay with me...

To some picking out special clothing may be trivial and thats fine, but to the OP (and myself) , it means more than just that....

My MIL "tried" to say she was going to pick up my DS a suit for his 1st Christmas and I politely said "thats really sweet, but it is important to DH and I to pick his holiday outfits"...

To the OP, I would agree to take some pics of your DC in the costume and still buy your own since it is important to you and DH

Re: Vent: my mom bought my son..

Wow! I can totally see my mil doing that..but didn't even think of it. Thank God I showed her the costumes I picked out for them already and beat her too it. Now, I am warned about all of the other holidays..I hope she doesn't attempt to do that. I would just let her know...and do exactly what you are doing..take a few pics in the outfit and than buy something of your own for him...

Re: Vent: my mom bought my son..

When I first read your post I though "it's not a big deal...just put him in it, take some pictures and then put his real costume on" but then I realized I was looking at the situation 2 years out...far out enough to forget what it feels like.

When I think back to the "firsts" they were important to me and I would have been annoyed by it. It doesn't sound like you need advice on what to do but rather just some "yeah, btdt and it's annoying" hugs and laughs.

So having actually btdt and not liked it...these are for you from me: