Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

Well, as I get closer to my due date. I am getting so nervous to give birth.

I am actually terrified, I just keep thinking about the pain, the tearing... etc..

I guess it's just the unknown, since this is my first baby.

Is anyone else feeling this way?

I'm trying to think of the happy things...like meeting my lil man. But, my mind always goes back to the whole birth process.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

I have been feeling the same way recently. Part of my fears are totally irrational (like being afraid I'll looklike a wimp if I go for the epidural ) then part of it is I just have no idea what to expect!

Our childbirth class starts next week and I am hoping it will help to ease my fears.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

I think the whole thing is terrifying really. I mean in a way it is like nothing else we have ever experienced before, and nothing that can really be *practiced* KWIM?

I think you will be fine and once it happens all you will think about is meeting your LO

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

As a BTDT mom- I remember clearly feeling the same exact way just before having DD #1.

It was NOT as bad as I had thought it would be. Honestly, once you are in the thick of it, you are almost outside yourself. I swear, I just remember being so focused that time seemed suspended. I tore slightly and didn't feel a thing. I also didn't feel the doctor giving me stitches either.

I DO remember the pain of DD when she was partially out- it took my breath away. That said, it was such an instantaneous sensation that as soon as I felt it, it was gone.

Rather than pain, I just remember being TIRED. Breathing through contractions and pushing is EXHAUSTING.

I have no fears of pain whatsoever with this birth. I just want it to go smoothly.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

The unknown is scary! You will be okay.

I had a friend remind me before I gave birth to DD #1 that she is a total wimp and gave birth to 2 children. Honestly, if it was THAT bad, all of the women who have given birth to more than one child would never do it again. And I am going on #2.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

I don't really think about it too much, to be honest. When I think about it, I think they have to come out somehow, and whatever that way is, I will deal with it when the time comes.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

You are so not the only one.

I think labor was a huge part of what scared me from having kids.

I DO NOT LIKE PAIN!!!!!!

Honestly and I am not just saying this, I do not know how I will handle this.

I just do not think I am strong enough to do this.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

As a self proclaimed "baby", I am terrified as well. However, I am no martyr and have EVERY INTENTION of request the epidural ASAP!

Why be in all that pain? This is 2008 people not 1809.

I just keep in mind that it's only temporary and then out comes our little angels. That's what keeps me going.

We can do it!!!!!!!!!

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

Posted by nrvbrd

You are so not the only one.

I think labor was a huge part of what scared me from having kids.

I DO NOT LIKE PAIN!!!!!!

Honestly and I am not just saying this, I do not know how I will handle this.

I just do not think I am strong enough to do this.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

I think for me it is the fear of the unknown and fear of complications.

But i'm thinking if millions of women have done it and thousands do it every day, then hey I can do it!

You can do it too!

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

I am also terrified....beyond terrified.

I started a thread last week about possibly getting a c-section because I was so scared of giving birth. After reading about c-sections, vaginal birth seems less scary. Both sound terribly traumatic. Am not looking forward to it at all!

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

Try to focus on the positive things.
I had an all natural birth with my daughter, no drugs nothing and it was the most amazing, empowering experience of my life.
I won't lie, it wasn't easy but when you are going through it you are so close to then end result of holding your child that really all your mind can focus on is that.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

Another scardy cat here! My knew birth idea is to go to the hospital and have them put me out as soon as I arrive. Then just wake me up 2 days later when I feel better!!

Message edited 10/27/2008 3:45:58 PM.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

Thanks Ladies, I feel a little better reading your posts.

I'm glad I'm not alone. I think for me, it's definitely the unknown.

I know I can do it, as well as all of you.

But, I do wish it was over already.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

Its my second time around and I am still scared. The pain wasn't the worst part- just the unknown. Last time, I had to wait for my doctor to wake up and that was so hard to NOT push. I just hope this birth goes smoother.

With the epi though the pain is really not as bad as you think and mine was turned off an hour before I started pushing!

The tearing and all that isn't so bad either and the recovery a lot better than I thought.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

I think a big part of fear comes form not knowing what to expect. Start reading about labor and delivery. Try reading positive birth stores and surround yourself with all the positive that revolves areound birth adn the birthing process and try to look at it in that light. Mothering dot com is a WONDERFUL resource for positive birth stories. You can read HUNDEREDS of great birth stories on there of women who have been through it.

WIll the anxiety go away though, no, but hopefully it will minimize your fear.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

I'm completely terrified too. I try not to think about it.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

100% with you on this one. I am the biggest wimp when it comes to pain. Years and years ago, probably when I was around 18 I convinced myself I'd NEVER have kids because I didn't want to go through the pain.

Oh well, gonna have to deal. Epidural, here I come!

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

What you're feeling is totally normal, many mnay pople feel that way! I felt that way about delivery until my Dr. agreed to give me a csection. Now I'm happy and worry free! I have a much better idea of what to expect and I feel like I am much more prepared and ready!!!! Already got my slippers and gown for the hopital!
XOXOXO
BOTB

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

since you prob here so many horror stories...i just wanted to share that i had a GOOD labor and delivery. Granted they did have to cut me and i had an epiosotomy when he was actually being born (which i didn't even feel when they did it...thanks to the anesthesia), but the actual labor and delivery went smooth and quick. I did have an epidural which helped, and i labored a home as long as possible, so by the time i went to the hospital i was already 100% effaced and 5 CM dilated. I was very lucky, hopefully you will be too

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

I am absolutely terrified as well. As a total control freak, I'm horrified that I have very little control over the situation AND don't know what to expect.

I'm scared to have a vaginal birth and scared to have a c-section. I'm worried about not knowing what to do. I'm worried something will go terribly wrong. Trust me, I've thought of it all.

And the fact that it is coming VERY soon is not helping my nerves!

eta: I'm also terrified because I have a very low threshold for pain. When my doctor feels around for the top of my pubic bone to do the measurements, it hurts so bad! I feel like I'm really in for it if THAT hurts me.

Message edited 10/27/2008 8:49:57 PM.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

I can tell you that I was totally freaking out about the whole labor thing. I am the biggest whimp when it comes to pain. It really wasn't that bad. I did have an epidural and that helped so much. Right after having her, with an episiotomy I said this was hard work but I would do it again.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

I am absolutely petrified.

I can deal with the pain I guess-- it depends on how bad it really is. But I am REALLY afraid of tearing, an episitomy, etc. Just a general loss of control, and having things take its course.

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

I went in saying to myself women have done this for centuries in fields without medicine. You have the best care available and that in itself should put you at a little more ease.

I had not 1, but 2 painfree births. You usually hear the horror stories but there are plenty of great ones like mine out there Good Luck!

Re: Giving Birth......Terrified!!!!

You are so not alone.

I remember being petrified. I am a control freak and the thought that I had NO contol over what was going to happen scared the crap out of me.

I was pretty calm the day I was induced though - and now looking back I think I always knew that I would have a c-section and not end up with a vaginal birth.

Whatever happens - it will all be a distant memory once you hold your DC in your arms!