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Why are you waiting to TTC?

Forum Opinion Poll
Money 34 23.29%
House- related 17 11.64%
Work reasons 12 8.22%
school/outside obligations 9 6.16%
don't want kids/ still deciding 39 26.71%
Other 35 23.97%
 

Those who are NOT TTC....

Posted By Message
Pages: 1 2 [3] 4

evenedan
Need a little sunshine

Member since 9/05

3843 total posts

Name:
D

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

We like having things just us right now. We go out a lot and take trips etc. and we're just not ready to change our lifestyle or do that stuff with a child yet. I know the clock is ticking and it will be time to move into the next phase of life eventually, but I'm not ready for it yet. Such a drastic and permanent change!

Posted 7/30/07 12:36 PM
 

Shanti
True love

Member since 6/05

12653 total posts

Name:

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

We enjoy our life as it isChat Icon

Posted 7/30/07 12:44 PM
 

JodiBabe
Married for 9 yrs!!!!!!

Member since 5/05

6672 total posts

Name:
Jodi

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

DH never wanted kids & I already have a 25 year old so we (DH & I) are not having any kids together.

Posted 7/30/07 12:51 PM
 

preciouslove
I love my DS!!!

Member since 5/05

9340 total posts

Name:
Blank

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

I have two kids...A 1 year old and a 37 year old. The 37 year old being my DH...Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Men do act like kids sometimes!

But seriously noone should ever question anyone's decision on when they are going to have kids. DH and I were married 3 1/2 years before our son was born. He was born in June and our 4 year anniversary was in July. Anyways I hated hearing "when are you going to have children" and yes I got the "you are not getting any younger" crap too...Chat Icon I was 32 when I had DS. Having children is a personal and very important decision and no jackass should ever question you as to why you haven't had kids yet.

WARNING: The stupid comments don't end when you have the baby because when I was pregnant people were asking me if I am going to have another baby after this one. I used to say.."do you mind if I give birth first'...Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Jesus Christ I hadn't even given birth to my first one and they were already asking if I am going to have more than one. Then after my son was born all i've heard is "so are you ready for #2" They would ask me this during the newborn months. I still get asked when is number 2 coming because number 1 needs a playmate. Uggggh it never ends! We haven't decided on #2 and financially I don't think we can have a #2. We are doing fine with the one we have. We are enjoying him so much but at the same time it is a lot of hard work.
Babies are a lot of work!

Message edited 7/30/2007 1:07:51 PM.

Posted 7/30/07 1:05 PM
 

MrsS2005
Mom of 3

Member since 11/05

13118 total posts

Name:
B

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

For a while, I wasn't ready to start a family. I knew I wanted kids eventually, but I didn't have the baby bug. Now, I'm starting to think about it more. We're waiting at least until we buy a house, which will hopefully be in the next 6 months.

Posted 7/30/07 1:12 PM
 

Kara
Now Zagat Rated!

Member since 3/07

13217 total posts

Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Posted by KittyTheStray

We're not having any. When people ask I flat out tell them DH got 'fixed' so they stop saying "Oh, you'll change your mind..." DH is 43, I'm 34. Trust me, we've thought it out Chat Icon



Neither one of us has ever wanted children. I'm SO FRICKIN' SICK of people telling us we'll change our minds. Chat Icon

No, we are not baby-eating martians. We like kids - we just don't want our own. We don't tell anyone they'll change your mind about wanting them!

The whole "When are you having kids" thing baffles me. I do NOT understand why it's ANYONE'S business to ask when someone is having kids or to comment on or question their decision. I don't at all mind it for discussion purposes here, but to be approached about this is really aggravating to me. I tell people it's none of their business.

Posted 7/30/07 1:14 PM
 

neenie

Member since 5/05

22351 total posts

Name:

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Posted by maybebaby
I think it's very very important to have lived together long enough to know the other person in and out...it takes a strong marriage to have a strong family!



I completely agree with this! We had lived together for just under 2 years when we first got married, and knew even then that we still wanted a few more years to build that foundation before we added anything else onto it. Looking back, and seeing how much we've grown as a couple, i think that it really one of the best decisions we could have made.

then we went back and forth about whether or not we even wanted to have kids. But, then i went back to school, so that gave us an excuse to put it on the back burner for a couple of years. Now, we definitely feel like we want kids... just figuring out When is the issue Chat Icon

Posted 7/30/07 1:19 PM
 

neenie

Member since 5/05

22351 total posts

Name:

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Posted by KittyTheStray

We're not having any. When people ask I flat out tell them DH got 'fixed' so they stop saying "Oh, you'll change your mind..." DH is 43, I'm 34. Trust me, we've thought it out Chat Icon



I'm not easily offended by this question, i think its usually good hearted... BUT... the whole 'you'll change your mind thing' is a little is definitely out of place. I would never say to a PG lady "are you sure you want that kid? you might change your mind!" so i think its kind of ballsy for them to say it to you! Chat Icon

Posted 7/30/07 1:21 PM
 

Superkat
More a stranger than a friend

Member since 5/06

9730 total posts

Name:
K

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Before we started TTC, our reasoning was about "other" things in our life. His mom had a stroke, my mom had multiple heart attacks, I just started a new job etc. Now things have calmed down a little and we are now TTC.

Posted 7/30/07 1:24 PM
 

itslaurie
LIF Adolescent

Member since 5/06

509 total posts

Name:
Laurie

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Message edited 8/1/2007 2:21:11 PM.

Posted 7/30/07 1:32 PM
 

melbalalala
Little Lady

Member since 5/07

5015 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

We have ALOT of traveling we want to do before we take on the responsibility of parenthood.

Posted 7/30/07 1:42 PM
 

anonttcer
BOOOO for fall!

Member since 7/06

10082 total posts

Name:
Meaning a NON ttcer!

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Posted by Kara

Posted by KittyTheStray

We're not having any. When people ask I flat out tell them DH got 'fixed' so they stop saying "Oh, you'll change your mind..." DH is 43, I'm 34. Trust me, we've thought it out Chat Icon



Neither one of us has ever wanted children. I'm SO FRICKIN' SICK of people telling us we'll change our minds. Chat Icon

No, we are not baby-eating martians. We like kids - we just don't want our own. We don't tell anyone they'll change your mind about wanting them!

The whole "When are you having kids" thing baffles me. I do NOT understand why it's ANYONE'S business to ask when someone is having kids or to comment on or question their decision. I don't at all mind it for discussion purposes here, but to be approached about this is really aggravating to me. I tell people it's none of their business.




Chat Icon Chat Icon I totally agree with you! Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 7/30/07 2:36 PM
 

Beth
The Key to your new home....

Member since 2/06

24849 total posts

Name:
Beth

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Posted by ejm1219

I want to enjoy my life with my husband before kids complicate it!



this is the main reason for us- and we want to buy a house first- which means deciding on staying in NY or not-

and we are flat out NOT ready!

Posted 7/30/07 2:39 PM
 

Whamtastic
LIF Adult

Member since 1/07

997 total posts

Name:
Big Fat Baby with a Blackberry

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

We just don't want kids yet. I'm 25, he's 31... we're both young and enjoy not having a ton of responsibilities. We love our life the way it is and realize that if/when we have children, our lifestyle will have to change drastically. So... other, I guess.

I, too, hate when people ask us when we're having a baby. Why should I have a baby? Because I'm married? That's lame. I was asked this a few weeks ago by an unmarried relative in her early 30s. I asked her when she was having a baby. She didn't seem to like it either.

Posted 7/30/07 2:56 PM
 

Ltdentway99
LIF Adult

Member since 9/06

1752 total posts

Name:

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

The last choice should be "still having fun as a free newly married couple, but would love kids at a later date" Chat Icon

Posted 7/30/07 2:59 PM
 

Waste06
Waste not, want not

Member since 6/06

7219 total posts

Name:
Lois Mom Mommy Mama Ma

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Where's the choice for "all of the above"?

All of your reasons, and then some.

Posted 7/30/07 3:03 PM
 

wp
5 years!!!!

Member since 6/05

1932 total posts

Name:
C

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

We just feel that since we have gotten engaged (almost 4 years ago Chat Icon) and then married its always something. First engaged, then the wedding, then an apartment, then buying a house, then construction on the house ect............It feels like it is non stop!!!! Now that things have finally slowed down in the past few months we are not ready for another "big project" yet. We are just enjoying being the two of us, spending time together, traveling, going out with friends and relaxing! I just enjoy spending time just the two of us!

Message edited 7/30/2007 3:06:57 PM.

Posted 7/30/07 3:05 PM
 

Arieschick29
aries+cancer= pisces&gemini

Member since 3/06

4268 total posts

Name:
Jen

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Even though we have been together 10 years this Feb we agreed that we wanted at least 2 years to just enjoy being married, to travel some more and enjoy time together before a baby ruins all that

I also would like to have a house and settle down in it for a bit before getting PG

Posted 7/30/07 3:06 PM
 

mikeswife06
Drama Momma

Member since 9/06

9947 total posts

Name:
Anne

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Posted by Whamtastic
I was asked this a few weeks ago by an unmarried relative in her early 30s. I asked her when she was having a baby. She didn't seem to like it either.




Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 7/30/07 4:44 PM
 

baghag
:P

Member since 5/05

10278 total posts

Name:

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Posted by Whamtastic
I was asked this a few weeks ago by an unmarried relative in her early 30s. I asked her when she was having a baby. She didn't seem to like it either.



Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Good answer!

Posted 7/30/07 5:55 PM
 

DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it

Member since 5/05

18602 total posts

Name:
The cure IS worse!

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Now that I had one...I am starting to get the "so when's the next one" question! Chat Icon
People always have SOMETHING to say

My answer...umm health reasons. You can always use that one, people don't seem to ask further questions after that.

Posted 7/30/07 6:14 PM
 

DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it

Member since 5/05

18602 total posts

Name:
The cure IS worse!

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Posted by DebG

Now that I had one...I am starting to get the "so when's the next one" question! Chat Icon
People always have SOMETHING to say

My answer...umm health reasons. You can always use that one, people don't seem to ask further questions after that.



ETA- Yes a baby changes things but I saw words like "ruin" on t his thread...if you feel that a baby will ruin things, why even consider having one?

the real eta- ooops hit quote instead of edit, my apologies.

Message edited 7/30/2007 6:18:11 PM.

Posted 7/30/07 6:17 PM
 

MrsCJK
Thankful!

Member since 11/06

1773 total posts

Name:
Cal

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

With us its that we will be married one year in October
we are enjoying being selfish, treating ourselves great, being able to do whatever we want whenever we want
we both love kids and definately want them but will probably wait 2+ yrs before we start a family

Posted 7/30/07 6:50 PM
 

angnick
Life is So Wonderful!

Member since 8/06

6663 total posts

Name:
Angela

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

we have a lot we want to do before we have a baby. travel a little bit more, enjoy living together and having it only be him and in our house.

we'll get there, maybe we'll start trying next year.

i know what it is like to raise a baby- my sisters were born when i was 11.. PERFECT birth control!!!

Posted 7/30/07 9:41 PM
 

nov04libride
big brother <3

Member since 5/05

14672 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Those who are NOT TTC....

Posted by DebG

Posted by DebG

Now that I had one...I am starting to get the "so when's the next one" question! Chat Icon
People always have SOMETHING to say

My answer...umm health reasons. You can always use that one, people don't seem to ask further questions after that.



ETA- Yes a baby changes things but I saw words like "ruin" on t his thread...if you feel that a baby will ruin things, why even consider having one?

the real eta- ooops hit quote instead of edit, my apologies.



i didn't say ruin myself, but i don't see how anyone could disagree that a child complicates married life by adding in so much more responsibility. but yes, anyone that thinks a baby will ruin the marriage probably shouldn't have one! for now we are enjoying being a bit more selfish...going to the gym after work without having to worry about not picking up a baby from daycare, or meeting each other out for drinks without having to worry about bringing a baby or finding a sitter. there will be a point when we are willing to give those things up for the obvious joy of having a baby, but for now we're enjoying our family of two.

Message edited 7/30/2007 9:55:14 PM.

Posted 7/30/07 9:49 PM
 
Pages: 1 2 [3] 4
 

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