I really need to vent this out....long...

So my mom passed away 5 years ago as some of you probably know cause I've talked about it before... anyway... she had the same name as my MIL... well, we decided to make it DD"s middle name in honor/memory of my mother and it just so happened that it was DH's mother's name too so it worked out well. Well let me tell you... I'm really starting to REGRET it! My mil makes it seem like its ONLY about her and hardly acknowledges MY MOM.
Three prime examples-
1- First week home- Had sign outside the house with DD's name on it (without an "E" at the end keep in mind). MIL says to me... did she spell her name with an "E" or was it without one like mine? I just look at her I say- um, NO.. no "E".. (what I want to say is... if there was an "E" there would have been an "E" in DD's name.. but I dont.)
2-Conversation comes up talking about naming the baby...
Chris- DD's name was perfect... it sounds nice with our last name and has the "A" for Nicole's dad.
Me- Yea... The "A" is for my dad, the "C" was for my mom.
MIL- AND MEEEE (like obnoxiously).
Me- (half a** smile at her)
Couldnt she just let it go?.. she JUST HAD to say that.
3-yesterday- we had a bbq with the family, cousins and stuff..
Carol- all friggin day...all I hear is her saying DD's first AND middle name
Me- just say her first name
Carol- no to me it will always be her first and middle name
Me- okay, whatever but most people dont say the middle name
*MIL's family even makes fun of the way she says DD's name (ALWAYS THE FIRST AND MIDDLE NAME) behind her back so I'm not the only one that noticed!!
I just feel like she's making me regret doing something that I wanted to do to be special for my mom...

Re: I really need to vent this out....long...

to you. I would be annoyed too. Your MIL sounds so self absorbed. I would think the only options would be to ignore her completely or have a serious talk with her about it. You DD will always know who she was really named for since you will be able to tell her!

Re: I really need to vent this out....long...

Dont let her to do that you, get to you.
Sometimes people are way too inconsiderate and feel its all about them.
Im sure she is proud you took the name in her case, being the same....Shes on a high and eventually she will come off of it.
Just correct her when she says her name and middle name...like we call her this, not with her middle name.

I do that with my DD, some people say it one way that I dont care for her to be called, one being my MIL. We just correct her politely and hope she gets it.

No regrets because its special to you and your mom

Message edited 7/5/2007 1:42:16 PM.

Re: I really need to vent this out....long...

I understand how you feel. I named my son after my Grandfather, and his name just so happened to also be my FIL's name. Well, my in-laws totally *think* we did this to honor FIL, but truthfully (in MY heart) I chose the name to honor my Grandfather. I allow IL's to believe that b/c it keeps the peace, kwim?

Whatever. As long as YOU know the real reason your daughter has that name - who else matters??

Re: I really need to vent this out....long...

Sounds like my MIL...exactly like her.

So I know I would be very upset too....

Just remember in your heart you know the REAL reason she has that middle name and when she is old enough, you let her know exaclty who shes named after!!

Re: I really need to vent this out....long...

Thanks so much everyone!!! I know I need to let it go and believe me, I try...
I'll just make sure that one day DD will know the true meaning of her middle name!