Just back from the doctor....

and why do I always feel so depressed and a tad irritated when I leave?

First thing is that I feel that Im being pressured into having an amnio..I dont know if Im going to have one or not but I still have 3 weeks to decide...
(Ultrascreen came back 1/1800-he still wants me to have one-Im 34)

2nd its a long story but I never had my HIV test when they first took my blood..they thought that they didnt have the consent form..they did but by then it was to late...when I found out at 8 weeks that they never tested it I said that I would wait until after I decided about the amnio...b/c at this point I had the low progestrone and he was starting to push for the amnio and I didnt need one more thing to worry about...there always is that worry you know?...He nags me about the blood every time Im in there and each time I tell him that I will once I decide whether or not I am having an amnio..which I have until 16 weeks to decide..

Today he argued with me about how far along I was..Im 13 weeks 3 days and he was telling me that I was 12 weeks 3 days..once he checked that little wheel thingy he saw that I was right!! What women doesnt know exactly how many weeks she is!!!!???

Im fine when Im there but then on the drive home I get to thinking and worrying...Like Does he know something that I dont?..Does he think that there is something wrong with the baby? Do I have HIV and I dont know it? Was there something in my bloodwork? (results are all normal by the way-I checked today when I was there-but you know how your mind goes)

I used to like going to the doctor and seeing the baby or hearing the heart beat...this isnt my first child...but this time Im starting to HATE going...

Re: Just back from the doctor....

Heather,

Sounds to me like maybe you should look into switching doctors. I had a similar problem with my 2nd pregnancy, and ended up switching OBs at 19 weeks! My very first appointment with my new OB was for the anatomy scan.

I am using him again for this pregnancy because I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE my doctor.

You should not have to dread going to the doctor. It should be enjoyable and exciting.

Re: Just back from the doctor....

I think you should DEFINITELY switch dr.'s! I don't think any doctor should EVER pressure you into an Amnio! An Amnio is a serious and invasive procedure with major risks and it should be up to you and DH to decide what you want to do. I don't feel it is right for any dr. to be pressuring you into this!

Also, as for the HIV - I don't think they are legally allowed to do the test without your consent so there is no way they could know something you don't...don't worry

IMO - SWITCH DR's! Sorry they are putting you through this during what should be an exciting time

Re: Just back from the doctor....

I agree - you should not dread seeing your doctor and he really shouldn't be this way with you. Sorry that you have to deal with this.

Sounds like his communication skills need a brush up. He should be telling you WHY he feels so strongly about an amnio instead of being so pushy. How are you supposed to know what he knows - he's the one that went to medical school so he needs to be better about explaining things.

With the HIV testing - again I think he needs to communicate better with you - my doctor explained to me that it's NYS law to check the baby. If the mother tests prior to delivery then they don't have to test the baby. If the mother declines to test then they have to test the baby. My doctor explained this to me and even gave me her opinion - She prefers that her patients do it to avoid having the baby tested and to prepare in case. Made sense and I appreciated her openness about it.

Re: Just back from the doctor....

HE sounds like a terrible communicator. If he is pushing the amnio for a 1:1800 result, that seems like a pretty good risk to me. If he has other reasons for you to have the amnio, he needs to tell you!
As far as the HIV thing goes, let them just do it in the next batch of blood so the baby doesnt have to have it when you give birth.
It just sounds like he doesnt tell you the reasons behind what he suggests. If you are uncomfortable and just dont feel good when you leave, you might want to look into another OB/Gyn....
This should be a happy time, you shouldnt feel like you get the life sucked outta ya when you have to go - we have to go so often!!!
Good Luck

Re: Just back from the doctor....

It seems that you and your doctor mesh like oil and water. Not the kind of relationship that you want considering the magnitude of what lies ahead. Bottom line if you are uncomfortable with his style switch now. There are plenty of great docs out there that can give you what you need.

Good luck!!!

Re: Just back from the doctor....

ITA with the above posters. Not only is an amnio YOUR decision, but it is indeed an invasive procedure that you should have the final say over. I know girls who had a 1:5 chance of DS & were not forced into an amnio.

Also regarding the HIV test, they have to let you know that they are testing for it. If I remember correctly I had to sign something giving consent.


I would get a new Dr. PG is stressful enough without having a good support system.

Re: Just back from the doctor....

Personally, I would just get the HIV test done sooner rather than later. But that is just me and you are entitled to your own opinion. Amnio is always optional regardless of your age or your odds. Find a doctor you can talk to.

Re: Just back from the doctor....

i would switch drs you don't should happy.

Re: Just back from the doctor....

I am 36 and decided not to have the amnio. They can't make you have one. For me, I've known so many false positive horror stories that I wasn't willing to have one.

As far as the HIV test, I agree with a previous poster. I do remember reading that there is a NYS law concerning newborns and HIV testing. I am not saying that you have it, it's just that studies have shown that the earlier they can give meds to an HIV+ pregnant mom the less likely she is to pass HIV onto her newborn. I'm pretty sure they tested me for that at my first appointment but I was tested within the year anyway.

Doctors will differ on their opinion on the amnio but all will require the HIV test.

Re: Just back from the doctor....

I am TTC. I have a fear of doctors. If I was treated like that I would switch my ob/gyn and not look back. I was treated horribly by and OB/Gyn last summer who ruined my vacation and was an Alarmist while I was away, there was nothing wrong with me except I was midcycle , Sorry if TMI and will NEVER go back to that office. Not even any of the doctors in that practice, because if he treated my like garbage for no reason then how would the other doctors in that practice treat me. The HIV testing is up to you as well as the amnio, and no one should force you into anything you are not comfortable with. HTH

Re: Just back from the doctor....

Thanks everybody...

Just wanted to add that I had chosen to wait to have the HIV test done b/c I HATE to have blood drawn (I pass out usually) and if I dont have the Amnio I will have the AFP and they will have to draw blood. Additionally I was looking online regarding the HIV Testing and I understand the law requiring the newborn testing and why the mother should be tested during pregnancy..its for the health of the baby BUT i also found out something very interesting Should the mother be HIV positive in most cases they dont treat the mother until the 3rd trimester for the HEALTH OF THE BABY!

My husband is so ****** b/c he was there when I told the doctor I wanted to wait until 16 weeks (b/c of the blood draw thing) and the doctor was like "sure as long as its done before the baby is born"

Re: Just back from the doctor....

Switch doctors. Seriously... you do not need to be stressed out when you are PG.

As for the HIV test, just tell them to do it when they take blood for the AFP test.

This guy sounds like you are going to be doing a lot of if you stick with him.

Re: Just back from the doctor....

Posted by Secretmama3

Heather,

Sounds to me like maybe you should look into switching doctors. I had a similar problem with my 2nd pregnancy, and ended up switching OBs at 19 weeks! My very first appointment with my new OB was for the anatomy scan.

I am using him again for this pregnancy because I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE my doctor.

You should not have to dread going to the doctor. It should be enjoyable and exciting.