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DancinBarefoot
06ers Rock!!
Member since 1/07 9534 total posts
Name:
The One My Mother Gave Me ;-)
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Wedding Invitation
A relative in Florida received a wedding invitation recently . . . via email. When you opened the email it showed a picture of an invitation and included a link to RSVP. When you follow the link it takes you to a website (that appears to exist for this purpose - not the couple’s website), that has a picture of the couple, the story of how they met and some other personal info about the couple. It also had a link to purchase pieces of the couple’s honeymoon. Things like donations to international airfare, wine tastings, or dinner.
Is this the way things are being done now, or is it tacky?
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Posted 3/28/22 9:37 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7272 total posts
Name:
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Wedding Invitation
How old is the couple? I ask because my younger cousins are starting to get married and they’re sending just the invitation with the wedding website printed on it and you rsvp on the site. For friends our age who are getting married (late 30’s) they sent the invitation with response card, accommodation card, etc.
I appreciate the beautiful invitation and while I don’t mind popping by the post office to mail the response card, it would certainly be easier to just do it online.
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| Posted 3/28/22 10:01 PM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Invitation
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Message edited 3/28/2022 10:08:16 PM.
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| Posted 3/28/22 10:07 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54917 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by LuckyStar
How old is the couple? I ask because my younger cousins are starting to get married and they’re sending just the invitation with the wedding website printed on it and you rsvp on the site. For friends our age who are getting married (late 30’s) they sent the invitation with response card, accommodation card, etc.
I appreciate the beautiful invitation and while I don’t mind popping by the post office to mail the response card, it would certainly be easier to just do it online.
Sounds like this was an emailed invitation too though.
I wouldn't mind RSVPing online but I think for something as formal as a wedding a physical invitation sent in the mail should be standard
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| Posted 3/28/22 10:10 PM |
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tourist
Member since 5/05 10425 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Invitation
I went to a wedding in September where the invitation was emailed via Paperless Post. It sounds similar to what you described.
They listed gift cards to pet smart & a fund for their dog adoption as a wedding gift, but the limit for the dog fund was already reached by the time we tried to do it, so we just wrote a check like we normally would. It doesn't make a difference to me-- $ is $.
They are in their mid 40s and had lived together for years, so they didn't need the regular house stuff.
I have a wedding next month, where we received a regular invitation, but the rsvps are all on the wedding website. This couple is early 30s, also living together for 3 or 4 years. I expected them to do the honeymoon fund thing, because they live in a studio apartment, but they did register for some household things that were given mostly as shower gifts, and we will give $ for the wedding.
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| Posted 3/28/22 11:37 PM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19453 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: Wedding Invitation
We did our kids b’nai mitzvah during the pandemic. We sent out a physical invite and had a website for rsvp. It also had a link to zoom the ceremony. We could only have 15 people at the ceremony in person. It is the newer way to do things. We did get pushback from any guest over 50. They could not figure out how to rsvp on line. So there was certainly a generational divide. But younger people all understood how to zoom. We held the b’nai mitzvah over a year after the pandemic began so it was not like zoom was not a thing by then. We did not have a registry, I think a registry is fine for a wedding. Nothing about what was sent was wrong. It is the newer way to do things. Ties change. You can adjust to them or not.
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| Posted 3/29/22 7:56 AM |
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PhyllisNJoe
My Box Is Broken
Member since 6/11 9145 total posts
Name:
Phyllis
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Re: Wedding Invitation
We are going to a wedding in April that had mailed Invites and website rsvp which also had their registry. It included the usual stuff and a honeymoon fund.
The honeymoon fund has been a thing for a while. Especially for couples who already live together or have a house already etc.
I don’t see anything wrong with it. It saves paper and time and it’s nice to put your $$ to something they actually want. For the wedding in April, we’re going to give them $$ as usual.
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| Posted 3/29/22 8:05 AM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54917 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by PhyllisNJoe
We are going to a wedding in April that had mailed Invites and website rsvp which also had their registry. It included the usual stuff and a honeymoon fund.
The honeymoon fund has been a thing for a while. Especially for couples who already live together or have a house already etc.
I don’t see anything wrong with it. It saves paper and time and it’s nice to put your $$ to something they actually want. For the wedding in April, we’re going to give them $$ as usual.
I just don't get it though as you generally give a check or cash at a wedding.
I don't know anyone who brings a physical gift for the household to a wedding.
Registries are generally used for showers.
So if I write you a $300 check ,use that towards your honeymoon. No need to register for your honeymoon.
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| Posted 3/29/22 8:16 AM |
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PitterPatter11
Baby Boy is Here!
Member since 5/11 7612 total posts
Name:
Momma <3
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Wedding Invitation
I personally would prefer a digital invite. Less waste and less cost for the bride and groom.
Honeymoon registries have been a thing since I got married in the early 2000s (15-20 years ago). I had many friends who had them and never thought anything of them.
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| Posted 3/29/22 8:29 AM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination
Member since 5/05 4430 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Wedding Invitation
I don't mind digital invites but I do prefer the paper ones. To me it just shows the formality of the event but it could also just be because I'm old lol. Honeymoon registries don't bother me. They have been around for decades. I find it no different than having a registry for a baby or bridal shower.
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| Posted 3/29/22 8:43 AM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9508 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by Hofstra26
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Wow. That's a really weird reaction. Personally I find it to be such a great idea! I could say the same about a registry for pots and pans. You want pots and pans, go buy them yourself!!! But I am a person who treasures experiences much more than I do material items so giving someone the gift of a nice dinner or an excursion on their honeymoon is so much more meaningful than getting them china that's going to sit and collect dust for 363 days of the year.
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| Posted 3/29/22 8:56 AM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9508 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Invitation
As much as I love paper invites, I think that digital invites, even for a wedding, will become the norm. Snail mail shouldn't even be a thing anymore.
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| Posted 3/29/22 8:57 AM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54917 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Wow. That's a really weird reaction. Personally I find it to be such a great idea! I could say the same about a registry for pots and pans. You want pots and pans, go buy them yourself!!! But I am a person who treasures experiences much more than I do material items so giving someone the gift of a nice dinner or an excursion on their honeymoon is so much more meaningful than getting them china that's going to sit and collect dust for 363 days of the year.
But wouldn't giving them cash- as we all do at weddings- be the same thing?
Why does it have to be ear marked for a steak dinner at the honeymoon or a massage?
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| Posted 3/29/22 9:03 AM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Wow. That's a really weird reaction. Personally I find it to be such a great idea! I could say the same about a registry for pots and pans. You want pots and pans, go buy them yourself!!! But I am a person who treasures experiences much more than I do material items so giving someone the gift of a nice dinner or an excursion on their honeymoon is so much more meaningful than getting them china that's going to sit and collect dust for 363 days of the year.
Weird how?
Traditionally, bridal showers and subsequently the registries that go along with them are meant to help a new couple start their life together. The idea is to give them things to set up their first home together.
Registering for your honeymoon is tacky IMO. If you want a honeymoon, that's on you to fund, not on your guests. I used a portion of my wedding gifts to pay for my honeymoon but I would certainly never think to have asked anyone attending my wedding to pay for my airfare, dinners, hotel, excursions etc.
To each his own, I personally find a honeymoon registry tacky.
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| Posted 3/29/22 9:07 AM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9508 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by NervousNell
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Wow. That's a really weird reaction. Personally I find it to be such a great idea! I could say the same about a registry for pots and pans. You want pots and pans, go buy them yourself!!! But I am a person who treasures experiences much more than I do material items so giving someone the gift of a nice dinner or an excursion on their honeymoon is so much more meaningful than getting them china that's going to sit and collect dust for 363 days of the year.
But wouldn't giving them cash- as we all do at weddings- be the same thing?
Why does it have to be ear marked for a steak dinner at the honeymoon or a massage?
In most places outside of NY it is tacky to give cash. So I feel like this is a nice way to give something special.
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| Posted 3/29/22 9:19 AM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54917 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by lululu
Posted by NervousNell
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Wow. That's a really weird reaction. Personally I find it to be such a great idea! I could say the same about a registry for pots and pans. You want pots and pans, go buy them yourself!!! But I am a person who treasures experiences much more than I do material items so giving someone the gift of a nice dinner or an excursion on their honeymoon is so much more meaningful than getting them china that's going to sit and collect dust for 363 days of the year.
But wouldn't giving them cash- as we all do at weddings- be the same thing?
Why does it have to be ear marked for a steak dinner at the honeymoon or a massage?
In most places outside of NY it is tacky to give cash. So I feel like this is a nice way to give something special.
Interesting. I know here it's tacky to give a wrapped gift at a wedding
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| Posted 3/29/22 9:21 AM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9508 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Wow. That's a really weird reaction. Personally I find it to be such a great idea! I could say the same about a registry for pots and pans. You want pots and pans, go buy them yourself!!! But I am a person who treasures experiences much more than I do material items so giving someone the gift of a nice dinner or an excursion on their honeymoon is so much more meaningful than getting them china that's going to sit and collect dust for 363 days of the year.
Weird how?
Traditionally, bridal showers and subsequently the registries that go along with them are meant to help a new couple start their life together. The idea is to give them things to set up their first home together.
Registering for your honeymoon is tacky IMO. If you want a honeymoon, that's on you to fund, not on your guests. I used a portion of my wedding gifts to pay for my honeymoon but I would certainly never think to have asked anyone attending my wedding to pay for my airfare, dinners, hotel, excursions etc.
To each his own, I personally find a honeymoon registry tacky.
Weird that you would take such offense to a couple asking for an experience rather than a material thing. I hate to tell you but nowadays most people don't get married to their high school sweetheart when they are 22 coming straight from living with their parents. Most couples live on their own and/or together and don't need sheets and towels and pots and pans. Who cares about tradition? This makes it easier for the couple to get what they actually want. What I find tacky is complaining about that and deliberately ignoring the what the couple is asking for. If you don't want to give a gift, you certainly don't have to. But most people register for things for their wedding, why would you want them to register for things they don't want in the name of tradition?
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| Posted 3/29/22 9:23 AM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Wow. That's a really weird reaction. Personally I find it to be such a great idea! I could say the same about a registry for pots and pans. You want pots and pans, go buy them yourself!!! But I am a person who treasures experiences much more than I do material items so giving someone the gift of a nice dinner or an excursion on their honeymoon is so much more meaningful than getting them china that's going to sit and collect dust for 363 days of the year.
Weird how?
Traditionally, bridal showers and subsequently the registries that go along with them are meant to help a new couple start their life together. The idea is to give them things to set up their first home together.
Registering for your honeymoon is tacky IMO. If you want a honeymoon, that's on you to fund, not on your guests. I used a portion of my wedding gifts to pay for my honeymoon but I would certainly never think to have asked anyone attending my wedding to pay for my airfare, dinners, hotel, excursions etc.
To each his own, I personally find a honeymoon registry tacky.
Weird that you would take such offense to a couple asking for an experience rather than a material thing. I hate to tell you but nowadays most people don't get married to their high school sweetheart when they are 22 coming straight from living with their parents. Most couples live on their own and/or together and don't need sheets and towels and pots and pans. Who cares about tradition? This makes it easier for the couple to get what they actually want. What I find tacky is complaining about that and deliberately ignoring the what the couple is asking for. If you don't want to give a gift, you certainly don't have to. But most people register for things for their wedding, why would you want them to register for things they don't want in the name of tradition?
I never said I was offended and please stop bringing up details about my personal life which have NO bearing on the conversation.
As per the rest of your comments, I always give generous gifts both at the shower and at the wedding. However, I do find it in poor taste to register for a honeymoon. If you do not, cool. As I've said, to each his own.
Message edited 3/29/2022 9:33:02 AM.
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| Posted 3/29/22 9:32 AM |
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Wow. That's a really weird reaction. Personally I find it to be such a great idea! I could say the same about a registry for pots and pans. You want pots and pans, go buy them yourself!!! But I am a person who treasures experiences much more than I do material items so giving someone the gift of a nice dinner or an excursion on their honeymoon is so much more meaningful than getting them china that's going to sit and collect dust for 363 days of the year.
Weird how?
Traditionally, bridal showers and subsequently the registries that go along with them are meant to help a new couple start their life together. The idea is to give them things to set up their first home together.
Registering for your honeymoon is tacky IMO. If you want a honeymoon, that's on you to fund, not on your guests. I used a portion of my wedding gifts to pay for my honeymoon but I would certainly never think to have asked anyone attending my wedding to pay for my airfare, dinners, hotel, excursions etc.
To each his own, I personally find a honeymoon registry tacky.
Weird that you would take such offense to a couple asking for an experience rather than a material thing. I hate to tell you but nowadays most people don't get married to their high school sweetheart when they are 22 coming straight from living with their parents. Most couples live on their own and/or together and don't need sheets and towels and pots and pans. Who cares about tradition? This makes it easier for the couple to get what they actually want. What I find tacky is complaining about that and deliberately ignoring the what the couple is asking for. If you don't want to give a gift, you certainly don't have to. But most people register for things for their wedding, why would you want them to register for things they don't want in the name of tradition?
I find it much different too now as people are getting married older. We got married at 21/23 and needed everything. We didn't even have a registry as I felt like I was asking for things (which in turn you are anyway but it felt weird to me). My mom just told the people who asked what I needed and I got everything that I needed and what I didn't we bought on our own.
We were engaged at 19/21 so had over 2 years to save which we used to furnish our apartment and our honeymoon. We didn't pay for much for our wedding so that helped for us to be able to start our life off debt free and with everything we needed and wanted.
I personally have never gone to a shower or wedding where they asked for honeymoon money but I assume the cash I give could be used for that and is their choice.
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| Posted 3/29/22 9:39 AM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9508 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Wow. That's a really weird reaction. Personally I find it to be such a great idea! I could say the same about a registry for pots and pans. You want pots and pans, go buy them yourself!!! But I am a person who treasures experiences much more than I do material items so giving someone the gift of a nice dinner or an excursion on their honeymoon is so much more meaningful than getting them china that's going to sit and collect dust for 363 days of the year.
Weird how?
Traditionally, bridal showers and subsequently the registries that go along with them are meant to help a new couple start their life together. The idea is to give them things to set up their first home together.
Registering for your honeymoon is tacky IMO. If you want a honeymoon, that's on you to fund, not on your guests. I used a portion of my wedding gifts to pay for my honeymoon but I would certainly never think to have asked anyone attending my wedding to pay for my airfare, dinners, hotel, excursions etc.
To each his own, I personally find a honeymoon registry tacky.
Weird that you would take such offense to a couple asking for an experience rather than a material thing. I hate to tell you but nowadays most people don't get married to their high school sweetheart when they are 22 coming straight from living with their parents. Most couples live on their own and/or together and don't need sheets and towels and pots and pans. Who cares about tradition? This makes it easier for the couple to get what they actually want. What I find tacky is complaining about that and deliberately ignoring the what the couple is asking for. If you don't want to give a gift, you certainly don't have to. But most people register for things for their wedding, why would you want them to register for things they don't want in the name of tradition?
I never said I was offended and please stop bringing up details about my personal life which have NO bearing on the conversation.
As per the rest of your comments, I always give generous gifts both at the shower and at the wedding. However, I do find it in poor taste to register for a honeymoon. If you do not, cool. As I've said, to each his own.
The fact that people usually don't go from their parents house directly to marrying someone absolutely has bearing on the conversation. This is not 1950 anymore. People don't care about china anymore.
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| Posted 3/29/22 9:43 AM |
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Wow. That's a really weird reaction. Personally I find it to be such a great idea! I could say the same about a registry for pots and pans. You want pots and pans, go buy them yourself!!! But I am a person who treasures experiences much more than I do material items so giving someone the gift of a nice dinner or an excursion on their honeymoon is so much more meaningful than getting them china that's going to sit and collect dust for 363 days of the year.
Weird how?
Traditionally, bridal showers and subsequently the registries that go along with them are meant to help a new couple start their life together. The idea is to give them things to set up their first home together.
Registering for your honeymoon is tacky IMO. If you want a honeymoon, that's on you to fund, not on your guests. I used a portion of my wedding gifts to pay for my honeymoon but I would certainly never think to have asked anyone attending my wedding to pay for my airfare, dinners, hotel, excursions etc.
To each his own, I personally find a honeymoon registry tacky.
Weird that you would take such offense to a couple asking for an experience rather than a material thing. I hate to tell you but nowadays most people don't get married to their high school sweetheart when they are 22 coming straight from living with their parents. Most couples live on their own and/or together and don't need sheets and towels and pots and pans. Who cares about tradition? This makes it easier for the couple to get what they actually want. What I find tacky is complaining about that and deliberately ignoring the what the couple is asking for. If you don't want to give a gift, you certainly don't have to. But most people register for things for their wedding, why would you want them to register for things they don't want in the name of tradition?
I never said I was offended and please stop bringing up details about my personal life which have NO bearing on the conversation.
As per the rest of your comments, I always give generous gifts both at the shower and at the wedding. However, I do find it in poor taste to register for a honeymoon. If you do not, cool. As I've said, to each his own.
The fact that people usually don't go from their parents house directly to marrying someone absolutely has bearing on the conversation. This is not 1950 anymore. People don't care about china anymore.
I wasn't even interested in China back then as I had no place for it. Now, since no one else had room, I inherited my grandmother's china and use it for holidays.
I honestly don't know anyone who does not have an apt or house together anymore before being married. Many even have house warmings before getting married so they get things there.
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| Posted 3/29/22 10:31 AM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9508 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by windyweather21
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Wow. That's a really weird reaction. Personally I find it to be such a great idea! I could say the same about a registry for pots and pans. You want pots and pans, go buy them yourself!!! But I am a person who treasures experiences much more than I do material items so giving someone the gift of a nice dinner or an excursion on their honeymoon is so much more meaningful than getting them china that's going to sit and collect dust for 363 days of the year.
Weird how?
Traditionally, bridal showers and subsequently the registries that go along with them are meant to help a new couple start their life together. The idea is to give them things to set up their first home together.
Registering for your honeymoon is tacky IMO. If you want a honeymoon, that's on you to fund, not on your guests. I used a portion of my wedding gifts to pay for my honeymoon but I would certainly never think to have asked anyone attending my wedding to pay for my airfare, dinners, hotel, excursions etc.
To each his own, I personally find a honeymoon registry tacky.
Weird that you would take such offense to a couple asking for an experience rather than a material thing. I hate to tell you but nowadays most people don't get married to their high school sweetheart when they are 22 coming straight from living with their parents. Most couples live on their own and/or together and don't need sheets and towels and pots and pans. Who cares about tradition? This makes it easier for the couple to get what they actually want. What I find tacky is complaining about that and deliberately ignoring the what the couple is asking for. If you don't want to give a gift, you certainly don't have to. But most people register for things for their wedding, why would you want them to register for things they don't want in the name of tradition?
I never said I was offended and please stop bringing up details about my personal life which have NO bearing on the conversation.
As per the rest of your comments, I always give generous gifts both at the shower and at the wedding. However, I do find it in poor taste to register for a honeymoon. If you do not, cool. As I've said, to each his own.
The fact that people usually don't go from their parents house directly to marrying someone absolutely has bearing on the conversation. This is not 1950 anymore. People don't care about china anymore.
I wasn't even interested in China back then as I had no place for it. Now, since no one else had room, I inherited my grandmother's china and use it for holidays.
I honestly don't know anyone who does not have an apt or house together anymore before being married. Many even have house warmings before getting married so they get things there.
Yeah, I think people need to adapt to the times. Even if a registry was traditionally for people to get things to start their new homes, there is really not as much need for that now. So why not give them something so they can have a beautiful honeymoon? I just can't quite understand why anyone, let alone an entire family or group of people, would decline to get the couple something they want and think it's tacky. Honestly it sounds like something my very grouchy 75 year old mother would complain about. Personally I have better things to do with my time than judge what someone puts on their registry.
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| Posted 3/29/22 11:13 AM |
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by lululu
Posted by windyweather21
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
I find it so incredibly tacky to ask people to fund your honeymoon. I had a cousin do that and it went over like a ton of bricks. Everyone ignored the "donation site" and not a single person gave her anything towards the honeymoon. No surprise!
I find things like this in very poor taste. You want a honeymoon? Cool, fund it yourself. Or use your gift money to "pay yourself back". You don't create a website with links for people to buy parts of your honeymoon. Such poor etiquette.
ETA - The digital invite wouldn't bother me, the link to pay for their honeymoon is a definite turn off.
Wow. That's a really weird reaction. Personally I find it to be such a great idea! I could say the same about a registry for pots and pans. You want pots and pans, go buy them yourself!!! But I am a person who treasures experiences much more than I do material items so giving someone the gift of a nice dinner or an excursion on their honeymoon is so much more meaningful than getting them china that's going to sit and collect dust for 363 days of the year.
Weird how?
Traditionally, bridal showers and subsequently the registries that go along with them are meant to help a new couple start their life together. The idea is to give them things to set up their first home together.
Registering for your honeymoon is tacky IMO. If you want a honeymoon, that's on you to fund, not on your guests. I used a portion of my wedding gifts to pay for my honeymoon but I would certainly never think to have asked anyone attending my wedding to pay for my airfare, dinners, hotel, excursions etc.
To each his own, I personally find a honeymoon registry tacky.
Weird that you would take such offense to a couple asking for an experience rather than a material thing. I hate to tell you but nowadays most people don't get married to their high school sweetheart when they are 22 coming straight from living with their parents. Most couples live on their own and/or together and don't need sheets and towels and pots and pans. Who cares about tradition? This makes it easier for the couple to get what they actually want. What I find tacky is complaining about that and deliberately ignoring the what the couple is asking for. If you don't want to give a gift, you certainly don't have to. But most people register for things for their wedding, why would you want them to register for things they don't want in the name of tradition?
I never said I was offended and please stop bringing up details about my personal life which have NO bearing on the conversation.
As per the rest of your comments, I always give generous gifts both at the shower and at the wedding. However, I do find it in poor taste to register for a honeymoon. If you do not, cool. As I've said, to each his own.
The fact that people usually don't go from their parents house directly to marrying someone absolutely has bearing on the conversation. This is not 1950 anymore. People don't care about china anymore.
I wasn't even interested in China back then as I had no place for it. Now, since no one else had room, I inherited my grandmother's china and use it for holidays.
I honestly don't know anyone who does not have an apt or house together anymore before being married. Many even have house warmings before getting married so they get things there.
Yeah, I think people need to adapt to the times. Even if a registry was traditionally for people to get things to start their new homes, there is really not as much need for that now. So why not give them something so they can have a beautiful honeymoon? I just can't quite understand why anyone, let alone an entire family or group of people, would decline to get the couple something they want and think it's tacky. Honestly it sounds like something my very grouchy 75 year old mother would complain about. Personally I have better things to do with my time than judge what someone puts on their registry.
It makes no sense and who knows what the couple does with the money you give them anyway. For all you know, they could go and blow it all on drugs but I guess that is better than asking for a fund for their honeymoon.
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| Posted 3/29/22 11:16 AM |
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FirstMate
My lil cowboy
Member since 10/10 7789 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Invitation
I think this is definitely a new trend. My BFF just got married and was telling me a lot of the younger brides on her Brides of Long Island page are emailing invitations. I mean, it cost me over $400 at the post office when I got married so I don't think it's a bad idea.
As for the honeymoon registry, to me, it's just a sign of changing times. If the couple is already set up with all the housewares, it's a nice option if someone still wants to give a gift.
Message edited 3/29/2022 12:45:37 PM.
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| Posted 3/29/22 12:43 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9508 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Invitation
Posted by windyweather21
It makes no sense and who knows what the couple does with the money you give them anyway. For all you know, they could go and blow it all on drugs but I guess that is better than asking for a fund for their honeymoon.
Yeah I think I might think it's tacky if someone registered at the local dispensary or sex toy shop... But for a nice dinner while on their honeymoon? No. I would think it's special that when they are enjoying the dinner they would think of me. If I had done this I would even take a pic of me doing whatever they paid for and send it with the thank you.
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| Posted 3/29/22 12:53 PM |
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