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luckystar08
LIF Infant
Member since 9/08 354 total posts
Name:
C
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow UPDATE
So we RSVPd yes over a month ago when NJ was in a much better place and we were both comfortable with the decision. The ceremony is outdoors and the reception is indoors. Its in an area of Nj where cases have risen significantly but the room capacity is 400 and there are around 60 guests with no assigned seating so we can spread out. There will be some family arriving from CO.
DH says he feels pretty safe but I can’t help but think that it may not be the smartest decision to attend right now. Especially since my in laws will
Be coming over for Thanksgiving.
Honest opinions- would you suck it up and go and just be extra careful? Or would you explain your concerns to the bride, give a slightly larger gift?
This really sucks!
UPDATE: Thanks you for your helpful responses! I agree its too late to back out now. We will definitely do the ceremony and then will go to the reception and play it by ear based on what we see. We went away to Montauk in September, have been going to grocery stores throughout, have done plenty of outdoor dining and also some indoor- only at places that followed the rules. In addition DH is essential and never stopped working and and I have been on a rotational schedule in-office schedule since late August. This is the first time I have felt truly uncomfortable about anything. Thanks for listening...
Message edited 11/14/2020 3:39:36 AM.
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Posted 11/14/20 2:20 AM  |
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RainyDay
LIF Adult
Member since 6/15 3986 total posts
Name:
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
Since its tomorrow I would just suck it up.
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| Posted 11/14/20 2:22 AM |
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M514
Hi
Member since 8/10 6011 total posts
Name:
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
I would not go.
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| Posted 11/14/20 2:27 AM |
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curley999
Family!
Member since 5/05 2314 total posts
Name:
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
Given the room capacity and number of guests, I would wear a mask, bring hand sanitizer and go! Sounds more spaced out then my local target these days.
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| Posted 11/14/20 2:31 AM |
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BFNY516
LIF Adult
Member since 7/20 1187 total posts
Name:
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
No way.
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| Posted 11/14/20 2:31 AM |
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nycbuslady
LIF Adult
Member since 9/15 1063 total posts
Name:
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
I would go.
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| Posted 11/14/20 2:33 AM |
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MrsWoods
LIF Adult
Member since 4/12 1461 total posts
Name:
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
Seeing as its tomorrow, i would go. Its so rude to cancel so late in the game. Plus, you said its Outdoors and the reception is in a large room. If you get there and feel its not a good idea, stay for the ceremony only and make sure you leave a gift.
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| Posted 11/14/20 2:33 AM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54917 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
I'd go. It's the same as eating in a restaurant - in fact with only 60 guests in such a big room it's even more spread out.
Bring hand sanitizer and sanitize often.
Message edited 11/14/2020 2:48:57 AM.
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| Posted 11/14/20 2:37 AM |
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StaceyWill
It's a girl!!!
Member since 6/10 21536 total posts
Name:
Stacey
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Re: Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
Posted by RainyDay
Since its tomorrow I would just suck it up.
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| Posted 11/14/20 2:45 AM |
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PitterPatter11
Baby Boy is Here!
Member since 5/11 7612 total posts
Name:
Momma <3
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
Given the current infection rate - NO.
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| Posted 11/14/20 2:49 AM |
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BFNY516
LIF Adult
Member since 7/20 1187 total posts
Name:
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
I can’t believe anyone would even want to have a wedding during a pandemic, like who is even in the mood or can relax and enjoy. Not to mention all the anxiety in the days after, worrying about any cough or congestion. I may be too uptight about it, though.
Message edited 11/14/2020 2:50:50 AM.
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| Posted 11/14/20 2:49 AM |
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Sash
Peace
Member since 6/08 10312 total posts
Name:
fka LIW Smara
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Re: Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
Posted by StaceyWill
Posted by RainyDay
Since its tomorrow I would just suck it up.
I agree. Maybe don't stay for the whole thing if you feel really uncomfortable or don't feel safe. Think of how much they had to limit the guest list.
My niece had 8 kids cancel on her the last minute, at a party that was limited to 40. She had to be very selective and was crying because she could've invited someone else, also because that heavily reduced the amount of friends that would be there. In the end everything worked out but just something to think about.
ET: it was for a sweet 16. Also no one got Covid and no one died. So if you are cautious, small parties can happen without issues.
Message edited 11/14/2020 3:01:16 AM.
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| Posted 11/14/20 2:50 AM |
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nycbuslady
LIF Adult
Member since 9/15 1063 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
Posted by BFNY516
I can’t believe anyone would even want to have a wedding during a pandemic, like who is even in the mood or can relax and enjoy. Not to mention all the anxiety in the days after, worrying about any cough or congestion. I may be too uptight about it, though.
Obviously, I don't know the circumstances, but maybe they postponed it from March or April. I don't think any of us thought we'd be in this situation in November! Or, maybe they just want to carry on with their lives. They don't want to delay the start of their marriage together!
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| Posted 11/14/20 2:57 AM |
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Katareen
5,000 Posts!
Member since 4/10 7179 total posts
Name:
Katherine
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Re: Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
Posted by RainyDay
Since its tomorrow I would just suck it up.
I don’t know if I would use the term “suck it up”. This is a dangerous pandemic, you didn’t suddenly get front row tickets to a concert and bail.
I personally wouldn’t go but I would’ve RSVP no to begin with.
If you feel like you have to go, I would go, but if you feel like people aren’t being safe I would have no issue with picking up and leaving. You don’t owe anyone anything and you have to take care of yourself.
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| Posted 11/14/20 3:00 AM |
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MrsG823
Just call me Mommy.
Member since 1/11 5570 total posts
Name:
S
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
I would go to the outdoor ceremony and skip the reception. The infection rate is climbing.
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| Posted 11/14/20 3:14 AM |
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Re: Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
I would go. It is rude to cancel the day before as we all know how much is put into planning a wedding.
It sounds like they are doing it the right way and everyone will not be on top of one another.
Personally I have been to parties since May, inside and outside, out to restaurants, shopping all over and always felt comfortable.
If you honestly feel uncomfortable you can leave but to not show up or cancel last minute wouldn’t be right.
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| Posted 11/14/20 3:23 AM |
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JennP
LIF Adult
Member since 10/06 3986 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
Posted by MrsG823
I would go to the outdoor ceremony and skip the reception. The infection rate is climbing.
That's what I was thinking.
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| Posted 11/14/20 3:30 AM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9508 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding in NJ Tomorrow
I would go but I have also been to indoor dining with over 60 people in a restaurant way smaller than you are describing.
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| Posted 11/14/20 3:35 AM |
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow UPDATE
I went to a wedding in Pearl river NY on Saturday (border of Ny/ NJ) I was MOH my kids ring bearers, dinner was 30 people. I work in the hospital and felt anxious the whole time and regretted my decision, we only stayed for appetizers and left the restaurant packed us in a private room, no masks, wasn’t good. Thankfully we are ok so far
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| Posted 11/14/20 5:04 AM |
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beachbabe
LIF Adolescent
Member since 9/15 731 total posts
Name:
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow UPDATE
No I would not go.
Maybe just go to the outdoor ceremony and give them your gift.
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| Posted 11/14/20 5:08 AM |
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MarathonKnitter
HAPPY
Member since 2/07 17374 total posts
Name:
EMBRACING CHANGE
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Re: Wedding in NJ Tomorrow UPDATE
i just read your update.
i agree with what you're feeling.
play it by ear and listen to your gut. hope you are able to enjoy the time with family.
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| Posted 11/14/20 5:12 AM |
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msma88
LIF Infant
Member since 8/05 300 total posts
Name:
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow UPDATE
NJ is a hot mess, I would not go.
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| Posted 11/14/20 5:28 AM |
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M514
Hi
Member since 8/10 6011 total posts
Name:
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Wedding in NJ Tomorrow UPDATE
My SIL said her area in NJ is almost at 7% and their district is officially remote till the middle of Jan. I’d stay far away from there if I were you.
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| Posted 11/14/20 5:58 AM |
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BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15657 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding in NJ Tomorrow UPDATE
I would go, and take these precautions.
Load up on 1000 mg of vitamin C before and after. Take some zinc also.
Bring alcohol wipes and use them after shaking hands, before eating, to wipe off your phone throughout the night.
Don't touch your eyes, nose or mouth with unclean hands.
If it's a buffet, use a napkin to touch the handles.
These are all of my pre-pandemic "things", and I've been doing them the past 8 months.
Have fun!!
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| Posted 11/14/20 6:36 AM |
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BFNY516
LIF Adult
Member since 7/20 1187 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding in NJ Tomorrow UPDATE
Posted by BargainMama
I would go, and take these precautions.
Load up on 1000 mg of vitamin C before and after. Take some zinc also.
Bring alcohol wipes and use them after shaking hands, before eating, to wipe off your phone throughout the night.
Don't touch your eyes, nose or mouth with unclean hands.
If it's a buffet, use a napkin to touch the handles.
These are all of my pre-pandemic "things", and I've been doing them the past 8 months.
Have fun!!
This is great advice and stuff we should all be doing all the time, like you do. My concern for OP would be that it’s all for nothing if she and her family don’t wear masks or truly stay many feet away from others.
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| Posted 11/14/20 7:31 AM |
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