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ANOTHER Update in first post :( Living in Hell

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hotelcalie
LIF Adult

Member since 12/05

1386 total posts

Name:

ANOTHER Update in first post :( Living in Hell

Just need to cry. My husband got very ill July 1. We went to the ER and he was diagnosed with a diverticulitis infection. OK, we have dealt with this before..no big deal. Wow was I wrong. Over the next 2-3 days he started getting worse. They found perforations in his colon, the infection spread to abdomen, then he became sepsis and got pneumonia. He was moved to ICU and spent 2 weeks there. During this time he was in a coma state for 8 days. They had to put in a tracheotomy and feeding tube. He finally was on the rebound and moved to pulmonary unit. Then hospital said he was stable and needed to be moved to another ling term facility. The only place that would take him is in NJ. It is a great place but 2 hours from our home. Luckily his parents are with him. He was doing amazing the first 3 days there but now it seems the infection is coming back. I had to go back to work today as I took the last 3 weeks off to be with him. He has no pay coming in and I am not sure my salary can pay our mortgage and all our bills.

Sorry this is long I just needed to purge this all out.

Prayers please. He is only 41 and none of this should be happening. Chat Icon


Update 8/23
He is STILL in the hospital :(
He was transferred to a special facility in NJ to wean from the vent but since has gotten 2 new infections. They did wean him so that is good but now we are still here. I have been driving to NJ and staying at a hotel Thur-Sunday so I can work still. Now once he gets out of here he will need inpatient PT rehab. This is a nightmare.

update 9/12
He is coming home TOMORROW! He is not really ready but at 77 days insurance has cut him off. He is walking with a walker and doing well. His BP is really low so we have many appts with docs over the next week to get to the bottom of it. Going to Columbia hospital since he will need the colon surgery. But at least he will be home. I think mentally it will help him sooooo much!! His boss is ghosting me, so sadly I think he no longer has a job but it is what it is. I only care that he recovers.

Thanks for the love!!!

update 10/22 - So DH was home 5 days and got very sick again. We rushed him to Columbia and he has been there for the past 4 weeks. He has had 2 surgeries the last being on Thursday. He is still in the ICU but hopefully things in his body will settle down and he can come home in a week or so. This has been 4 months of H E L L.

I will say there was another women I made friends with in the special ICU waiting room and she is 31, married 3 months..her husband went for a walk, got hit by a car and is paralyzed from the neck down...so it is all about perspective.

Message edited 10/22/2019 9:04:05 PM.

Posted 7/29/19 11:11 AM
 
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dianadrw
LIF Adult

Member since 5/06

2092 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Living in Hell

OMG how scary. Praying for you and your husband. I hope he makes a quick turnaround. Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 7/29/19 11:14 AM
 

Momma2015
Mommax2

Member since 12/12

6623 total posts

Name:

Re: Living in Hell

OMG I'm so sorry. It's so scary when it happens so fast like that. Similar the way my father got sick- he went in for an endoscopy as he was having trouble swallowing... came out of the hospital a month later with a feeding tube and a terminal esophogeal cancer diagnosis. And just nothing went right when he was at the hospital- set back after set back. Chat Icon

I'm praying he gets better soon!! Chat Icon Chat Icon

Is there any way you can take FMLA? You should get 12 weeks for that...

Message edited 7/29/2019 11:17:20 AM.

Posted 7/29/19 11:16 AM
 

Jennifer
Happy

Member since 5/05

4228 total posts

Name:
.

Re: Living in Hell

OMG I am so sorry. I am praying for you and your husband.

Posted 7/29/19 11:16 AM
 

lightblue
LIF Adult

Member since 1/17

2249 total posts

Name:

Re: Living in Hell

Sending prayers Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 7/29/19 11:16 AM
 

tray831
Dee-licious!

Member since 3/06

5352 total posts

Name:
His Baby

Re: Living in Hell


I am so sorry!
Diverticulitis can be a nightmare; as you know.

I assume he was on a Cipro/Flagyl combo of meds? What exactly are they giving him to fight the infection?

I know and understand how stressful this all can be. None of it is ever easy.

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Posted 7/29/19 11:29 AM
 

MsSissy
xoxoxo

Member since 3/07

39159 total posts

Name:

Re: Living in Hell

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Posted 7/29/19 11:33 AM
 

noni882
LIF Infant

Member since 7/06

373 total posts

Name:

Re: Living in Hell

You should speak to your HR rep about PFL leave. It is specific to taking care of a family member who is sick.
Sending prayers your way.

Posted 7/29/19 11:44 AM
 

Mrs213
????????

Member since 2/09

18912 total posts

Name:

Living in Hell

Sending prayers your way. See if you can at least get him on a waiting list closer to home. I hate that there is not much Available in terms of compensation for working people in these types of situations. Is your husband eligible for short term disability through his employer? If not he should qualify through N.Y. state (although sadly it’s not much)

Posted 7/29/19 12:00 PM
 

Lauren82
LIF Adult

Member since 10/06

4580 total posts

Name:
L

Re: Living in Hell

Prayers to you. My mom just dealt with this...not nearly to the extent of your husband, but I know the seriousness of this first hand!

Please call your mortgage company and credit card companies, etc. Most will make an arrangement due to an extreme life situation. That is one stress that hopefully you can eliminate.

I’ll pray for your husband and your family.

Take care of yourself too.

Posted 7/29/19 12:59 PM
 

pumpkinmom
LIF Adult

Member since 5/12

2911 total posts

Name:

Living in Hell

Praying for you and your family.

Posted 7/29/19 1:21 PM
 

oldtimerocknroll
LIF Adult

Member since 11/14

1629 total posts

Name:

Re: Living in Hell

I'm so sorry and am sending you many prayers. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 7/29/19 1:29 PM
 

Mushesgirl
Too blessed to be stressed

Member since 4/09

6566 total posts

Name:

Re: Living in Hell

oh no hoping he's a ok!! keep us updated when you can!

Posted 7/29/19 1:49 PM
 

TwinMommyToBoys
LIF Adult

Member since 12/16

2346 total posts

Name:

Living in Hell

Hoping he’s ok! I would contact his employer to put him out on FMLA to protect his job. Does his job have disability? You can file for that on his behalf if so. Also, I would contact your employer you are entitled to paid family leave. If you have Aflac, you can also file under their hospital plan for money as well. I’m sure it’s so overwhelming and scary but even having a few hours to you to take care of this stuff will help ease your mind. If you don’t mind me asking, was he moved for rehab? It doesn’t really seem right that a hospital would move him while he heals? I work in medicine- granted psych medicine but still. Anyways, I hope your husband is on the path to recovery and many prayers!

Posted 7/29/19 2:01 PM
 

hotelcalie
LIF Adult

Member since 12/05

1386 total posts

Name:

Living in Hell

His company is under 50 people so they do not have to do FMLA :(
I sent in papers for short and long term disability. Waiting on the approval on this.

Posted 7/29/19 2:32 PM
 

LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!

Member since 5/05

19406 total posts

Name:
L

Re: Living in Hell

I am so sorry. Where in NJ? Did he have disability insurance? Does your job offer paid leave for family care?

Posted 7/29/19 2:59 PM
 

NYCGirl80
I love my kiddies!

Member since 5/11

10413 total posts

Name:

Re: Living in Hell

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Posted 7/29/19 3:09 PM
 

MarathonKnitter
HAPPY

Member since 2/07

17374 total posts

Name:
EMBRACING CHANGE

Living in Hell

i'm praying for your DH and your family

Posted 7/29/19 3:16 PM
 

winter
LIF Toddler

Member since 4/09

420 total posts

Name:
J

Living in Hell

Sending lots of prayers your way.

Posted 7/29/19 3:34 PM
 

klingklang77
kraftwerk!

Member since 7/06

11316 total posts

Name:
Völlig losgelöst

Re: Living in Hell

Sending thoughts your way. Chat Icon

Posted 7/29/19 3:57 PM
 

BAK217
LIF Infant

Member since 8/14

320 total posts

Name:

Re: Living in Hell

My heart goes out to you and your family.
You have my prayers.

Posted 7/29/19 10:31 PM
 

Sash
Peace

Member since 6/08

10256 total posts

Name:
fka LIW Smara

Re: Living in Hell

I’m so sorry you and your family are going through this. I hope your husband gets the care he needs. I pray his health takes a turn for the better and for a full recovery. Check both your health insurance and talk to HR at work, you may have more options available to you. Chat Icon

Posted 7/30/19 8:45 AM
 

SusiBee
. . . . .

Member since 3/09

8268 total posts

Name:
S

Living in Hell

Sending you prayers and hugs.

Posted 7/30/19 9:57 AM
 

LIRascal
drama. daily.

Member since 3/11

7285 total posts

Name:
Michelle

Living in Hell

I'm reading this thinking that we have to do something... how awful for yu and your family to have to go through this torture. Praying for you and hopefully there's something we can do

Posted 7/30/19 1:42 PM
 

PitterPatter11
Baby Boy is Here!

Member since 5/11

7473 total posts

Name:
Momma <3

Living in Hell

I am so sorry.

A similar thing happened to a local family near me. She started a social media campaign and had a lot of success generating funds and support. . (Woodward strong on FB and IG)

Posted 7/30/19 4:21 PM
 
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