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Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

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Mrs-D-Girl
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Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

At what age do you think it's appropriate to let your child go into the bathroom by themselves?

My DS is 7 and he is starting to refuse to walk into a Women's bathroom with me when we are out together. If I let him go into the Men's alone, I wait outside the door but it still freaks me out. Chat Icon

Just wanted to edit - I am not referring to a very crowded place such as an airport, concert venue, movies....

More along the lines of a Restaurant, store.

Message edited 9/18/2017 2:16:54 PM.

Posted 9/18/17 12:18 PM
 

CookiePuss
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Member since 5/05

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Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

My son is 9 and I don't let him go into the Mens' room if I can help it. If it's a men's room that only allows one at a time, I do let him go in to it since he is the only one in there. Or, I use the family rest rooms. I know this doesn't really help but I would never let me son go into a men's room with other men in there, by himself.

Posted 9/18/17 12:34 PM
 

pnbplus1
Family

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Mommy

Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

My son is 7, almost 8, and no way will I let him go into a public restroom by himself. You make the rules, not him. If he refuses to go into the women's restroom, tell him he has to hold it as that is the only other option. If I had a girl I wouldn't let her go into a public bathroom by herself either. Too many news stories of children getting molested in bathrooms, almost kidnapped, etc. Not worth the risk IMO.

Posted 9/18/17 12:42 PM
 

KangaMom
...

Member since 1/06

4593 total posts

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Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

We avoid them lol but still bring my turning 8 year old son with me and he is fine with it.

Message edited 9/18/2017 12:45:32 PM.

Posted 9/18/17 12:44 PM
 

ali120206
2 Boys

Member since 7/06

17789 total posts

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Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

It depends on where we are.

At our pool - he goes into the men's room. Or if it's a small bathroom or a place that's not that crowded.

Otherwise he comes in with me.

ETA - We were at Stewart Airport recently with neighbors and my neighbor brought her 9 year old son into the ladies room with her which made me feel better.

Message edited 9/18/2017 1:02:20 PM.

Posted 9/18/17 1:01 PM
 

Mrs-D-Girl
Love my fur baby

Member since 8/07

5183 total posts

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Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

I know and agree that it's my rules and I make him go into the Ladies room with me. If we are in a very crowded place (Concert, airport, etc..) I would never think of not taking him in with me.

I was more referring to say a Restaurant something along those lines.

Posted 9/18/17 1:59 PM
 

Straightarrow
LIF Adult

Member since 2/11

3534 total posts

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Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Posted by Mrs-D-Girl

I know and agree that it's my rules and I make him go into the Ladies room with me. If we are in a very crowded place (Concert, airport, etc..) I would never think of not taking him in with me.

I was more referring to say a Restaurant something along those lines.




In restaurants I send my DS and my SO's DS alone to the bathroom. I went to the bathroom alone by 9&10 (their ages)

In the mall I stand outside the door.

I'm pretty sure unless I got a really bad feeling, I would do the same almost anywhere

Posted 9/18/17 3:19 PM
 

NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..

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Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

I'm a paranoid psycho so I'll be going in with her when she's 18.
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Posted 9/18/17 3:22 PM
 

Straightarrow
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Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Posted by NervousNell

I'm a paranoid psycho so I'll be going in with her when she's 18.
Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon



But you're both girls so it is easier

My 10 year old boy gets really uncomfortable being in a women's room and I don't blame him. He is as tall as me.

Posted 9/18/17 3:24 PM
 

Salason

Member since 6/05

9878 total posts

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Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Posted by pnbplus1

My son is 7, almost 8, and no way will I let him go into a public restroom by himself. You make the rules, not him. If he refuses to go into the women's restroom, tell him he has to hold it as that is the only other option. If I had a girl I wouldn't let her go into a public bathroom by herself either. Too many news stories of children getting molested in bathrooms, almost kidnapped, etc. Not worth the risk IMO.



My ex is a detective and used to work the Yankee Stadium area. He always pushed my 9yo DS to be independent in every way but this was one thing he was ADAMANT about him not doing. He said you wouldn't believe what goes on on a regular basis at a place like a stadium and to never let him go by himself.

ETA: in a restaurant where I can actually see the bathroom I let him go alone

Message edited 9/18/2017 3:29:02 PM.

Posted 9/18/17 3:28 PM
 

Mrs-D-Girl
Love my fur baby

Member since 8/07

5183 total posts

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Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Posted by Salason

Posted by pnbplus1

My son is 7, almost 8, and no way will I let him go into a public restroom by himself. You make the rules, not him. If he refuses to go into the women's restroom, tell him he has to hold it as that is the only other option. If I had a girl I wouldn't let her go into a public bathroom by herself either. Too many news stories of children getting molested in bathrooms, almost kidnapped, etc. Not worth the risk IMO.



My ex is a detective and used to work the Yankee Stadium area. He always pushed my 9yo DS to be independent in every way but this was one thing he was ADAMANT about him not doing. He said you wouldn't believe what goes on on a regular basis at a place like a stadium and to never let him go by himself.

ETA: in a restaurant where I can actually see the bathroom I let him go alone



That is what my concern was, restaurants, stores places where I am either watching him walk directly to the bathroom and my eyes don't leave till he walks out, or I am standing outside the door.

Posted 9/18/17 3:38 PM
 

Disneygirl17
LIF Toddler

Member since 11/16

496 total posts

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Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Kids are 9 and 7. They go to the bathroom alone at restaurants. When the bathroom is in plain sight. And I keep an eye on the bathroom the whole time.

Posted 9/18/17 4:43 PM
 

NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..

Member since 11/09

54917 total posts

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..being a mommy and being a wife!

Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Posted by Straightarrow

Posted by NervousNell

I'm a paranoid psycho so I'll be going in with her when she's 18.
Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon



But you're both girls so it is easier

My 10 year old boy gets really uncomfortable being in a women's room and I don't blame him. He is as tall as me.



Yeah I get it. That's why I am glad I have a girl!
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Posted 9/18/17 5:00 PM
 

Teachergal
We made a snowman!

Member since 1/08

3239 total posts

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Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

My son is 8. He doesn't come in with me to the ladies room anymore. I personally find it inappropriate. He isn't little anymore. What we do at a restaurant or Home Depot, etc. is for him to go into the bathroom and then come out and tell me if the bathroom is empty. It almost always is. If it's not, we wait until it is. When it's empty, he goes in and quickly does his business. Usually no one goes in during that time, but if someone does I call out to him so that he (and the stranger) knows that I know he is in there. I hate not being able to be with him, but this is how we try to make it work.
This is why I always have him go to the bathroom before we go! Chat Icon

Posted 9/18/17 10:03 PM
 

ChilisWife
God Bless America

Member since 5/05

3570 total posts

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A.K.

Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

My DD is 7 and I am always either in there with her or if its only a 1-2 person small bathroom, I wait right outside.

My DS is 10 and honestly after age 7/8 I dont feel it is appropriate for him to be in a ladies room. If DH is there he will go with him but otherwise I just wait right outside.

Posted 9/19/17 10:08 AM
 

Sash
Peace

Member since 6/08

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fka LIW Smara

Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Posted by ChilisWife

My DS is 10 and honestly after age 7/8 I dont feel it is appropriate for him to be in a ladies room. If DH is there he will go with him but otherwise I just wait right outside.



Same for me, my son is 8 (about to turn 9) and this year he started going in by himself while I wait outside. I thought it was inappropriate to have him in the girls restroom at this age.

My sister took him to the movies and i found out she brought him into the girls restroom. I told her not to do it again and how would she feel if it was reversed and there was an almost 9yr old in the bathroom. She has two girls so she doesn't get it sometimes.

Posted 10/6/17 12:01 AM
 

NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..

Member since 11/09

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..being a mommy and being a wife!

Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Posted by Sash

Posted by ChilisWife

My DS is 10 and honestly after age 7/8 I dont feel it is appropriate for him to be in a ladies room. If DH is there he will go with him but otherwise I just wait right outside.



Same for me, my son is 8 (about to turn 9) and this year he started going in by himself while I wait outside. I thought it was inappropriate to have him in the girls restroom at this age.

My sister took him to the movies and i found out she brought him into the girls restroom. I told her not to do it again and how would she feel if it was reversed and there was an almost 9yr old in the bathroom. She has two girls so she doesn't get it sometimes.



I get what you are saying but to be honest it wouldn't bother me if a 9 year old boy was in the ladies room. I mean it's not like the toilets are out in the open. You are in a stall....nobody sees you regardless. I wouldn't care if a man was in the next stall either to be honest ....the stalls are private. There isn't any open nakedness or exposure of body parts in public restrooms

Posted 10/6/17 8:00 AM
 

BargainMama
LIF Adult

Member since 5/09

15657 total posts

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Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Posted by NervousNell

Posted by Sash

Posted by ChilisWife

My DS is 10 and honestly after age 7/8 I dont feel it is appropriate for him to be in a ladies room. If DH is there he will go with him but otherwise I just wait right outside.



Same for me, my son is 8 (about to turn 9) and this year he started going in by himself while I wait outside. I thought it was inappropriate to have him in the girls restroom at this age.

My sister took him to the movies and i found out she brought him into the girls restroom. I told her not to do it again and how would she feel if it was reversed and there was an almost 9yr old in the bathroom. She has two girls so she doesn't get it sometimes.



I get what you are saying but to be honest it wouldn't bother me if a 9 year old boy was in the ladies room. I mean it's not like the toilets are out in the open. You are in a stall....nobody sees you regardless. I wouldn't care if a man was in the next stall either to be honest ....the stalls are private. There isn't any open nakedness or exposure of body parts in public restrooms



Exactly!!!

I never understand why people get so horrified if someone brings their son into the public restroom. In most other parts of the world, restrooms are co-ed.

Posted 10/6/17 8:52 AM
 

EricaAlt
LIF Adult

Member since 7/08

22665 total posts

Name:
Erica

Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Posted by BargainMama

Posted by NervousNell

Posted by Sash

Posted by ChilisWife

My DS is 10 and honestly after age 7/8 I dont feel it is appropriate for him to be in a ladies room. If DH is there he will go with him but otherwise I just wait right outside.



Same for me, my son is 8 (about to turn 9) and this year he started going in by himself while I wait outside. I thought it was inappropriate to have him in the girls restroom at this age.

My sister took him to the movies and i found out she brought him into the girls restroom. I told her not to do it again and how would she feel if it was reversed and there was an almost 9yr old in the bathroom. She has two girls so she doesn't get it sometimes.



I get what you are saying but to be honest it wouldn't bother me if a 9 year old boy was in the ladies room. I mean it's not like the toilets are out in the open. You are in a stall....nobody sees you regardless. I wouldn't care if a man was in the next stall either to be honest ....the stalls are private. There isn't any open nakedness or exposure of body parts in public restrooms



Exactly!!!

I never understand why people get so horrified if someone brings their son into the public restroom. In most other parts of the world, restrooms are co-ed.



This! My boys are 8 and 6. If we are at a restaurant and it's a single bathroom they can go by themselves and I wait outside or as long as I can see the door from where I'm at then I stay at the table.
For large, public bathrooms like the mall, Target and especially amusement parks they come in the ladies room. There are way too many people and my boys have no common sense. LOL! The stalls are closed so they can't see anything. Obviously if I'm with DH then he will take them. Thank goodness they are like camels and don't need to go as often. LOL

Posted 10/6/17 8:57 AM
 

nycgirl
Angels!

Member since 3/09

7721 total posts

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Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Interesting post!

It never bothers me to see any child of any age in the women's room.

BUT, I push my DS to be mature. He HATES using the women's room. I don't let him go independently at very crowded places (malls, fairs, parks) but if there is a male in our party (grandpa, uncle, dad), he goes with them.

In restaurants, small places, at 7, he goes by himself. He's old enough to know how to open the door, lock the door and that privates are private.

Posted 10/6/17 9:13 AM
 

Katareen
5,000 Posts!

Member since 4/10

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Katherine

Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

I think we have it easier as women! When my DH takes my DD out alone, he feels super uncomfortable having her in the men's room because urinals are not really private.
That's why I love that places like airports, Target, have family restrooms for a family of mixed genders to all go in together.

Posted 10/6/17 9:18 AM
 

Sash
Peace

Member since 6/08

10312 total posts

Name:
fka LIW Smara

Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Posted by EricaAlt

Posted by BargainMama

Posted by NervousNell

Posted by Sash

Posted by ChilisWife

My DS is 10 and honestly after age 7/8 I dont feel it is appropriate for him to be in a ladies room. If DH is there he will go with him but otherwise I just wait right outside.



Same for me, my son is 8 (about to turn 9) and this year he started going in by himself while I wait outside. I thought it was inappropriate to have him in the girls restroom at this age.

My sister took him to the movies and i found out she brought him into the girls restroom. I told her not to do it again and how would she feel if it was reversed and there was an almost 9yr old in the bathroom. She has two girls so she doesn't get it sometimes.



I get what you are saying but to be honest it wouldn't bother me if a 9 year old boy was in the ladies room. I mean it's not like the toilets are out in the open. You are in a stall....nobody sees you regardless. I wouldn't care if a man was in the next stall either to be honest ....the stalls are private. There isn't any open nakedness or exposure of body parts in public restrooms



Exactly!!!

I never understand why people get so horrified if someone brings their son into the public restroom. In most other parts of the world, restrooms are co-ed.



This! My boys are 8 and 6. If we are at a restaurant and it's a single bathroom they can go by themselves and I wait outside or as long as I can see the door from where I'm at then I stay at the table.
For large, public bathrooms like the mall, Target and especially amusement parks they come in the ladies room. There are way too many people and my boys have no common sense. LOL! The stalls are closed so they can't see anything. Obviously if I'm with DH then he will take them. Thank goodness they are like camels and don't need to go as often. LOL



Well for one my son doesn't want to go in to a women's restroom anymore, he's not allowed to do it in school? And second maybe there are young girls there who would feel uncomfortable around that age if a 9yr old is in there. I personally wouldn't care if someone had their son in there. However, personally i feel my son is too old to be in a women's bathroom and why make him feel uncomfortable. I am also big on giving him independence.

I feel like when he was going into his own stall then he needed to start going into the men's restroom. Last year and the beginning of this year he would turn when I would' go. I felt like it was time for him to stop going.

Posted 10/6/17 10:27 AM
 

Sash
Peace

Member since 6/08

10312 total posts

Name:
fka LIW Smara

Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Posted by NervousNell

Posted by Sash

Posted by ChilisWife

My DS is 10 and honestly after age 7/8 I dont feel it is appropriate for him to be in a ladies room. If DH is there he will go with him but otherwise I just wait right outside.



Same for me, my son is 8 (about to turn 9) and this year he started going in by himself while I wait outside. I thought it was inappropriate to have him in the girls restroom at this age.

My sister took him to the movies and i found out she brought him into the girls restroom. I told her not to do it again and how would she feel if it was reversed and there was an almost 9yr old in the bathroom. She has two girls so she doesn't get it sometimes.



I get what you are saying but to be honest it wouldn't bother me if a 9 year old boy was in the ladies room. I mean it's not like the toilets are out in the open. You are in a stall....nobody sees you regardless. I wouldn't care if a man was in the next stall either to be honest ....the stalls are private. There isn't any open nakedness or exposure of body parts in public restrooms



Just to address your point about men.. what about a little girl or pre-teen going to the bathroom.. I wouldn't want my younger nieces in a bathroom with a men in the next stall.
Sorry nope.

Posted 10/6/17 10:30 AM
 

NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..

Member since 11/09

54917 total posts

Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!

Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

Posted by Sash

Posted by NervousNell

Posted by Sash

Posted by ChilisWife

My DS is 10 and honestly after age 7/8 I dont feel it is appropriate for him to be in a ladies room. If DH is there he will go with him but otherwise I just wait right outside.



Same for me, my son is 8 (about to turn 9) and this year he started going in by himself while I wait outside. I thought it was inappropriate to have him in the girls restroom at this age.

My sister took him to the movies and i found out she brought him into the girls restroom. I told her not to do it again and how would she feel if it was reversed and there was an almost 9yr old in the bathroom. She has two girls so she doesn't get it sometimes.



I get what you are saying but to be honest it wouldn't bother me if a 9 year old boy was in the ladies room. I mean it's not like the toilets are out in the open. You are in a stall....nobody sees you regardless. I wouldn't care if a man was in the next stall either to be honest ....the stalls are private. There isn't any open nakedness or exposure of body parts in public restrooms



Just to address your point about men.. what about a little girl or pre-teen going to the bathroom.. I wouldn't want my younger nieces in a bathroom with a men in the next stall.
Sorry nope.



That I get.
But a 9 year old boy in a woman's bathroom,supervised by his mom or aunt, is a bit different than a grown man in with pre teen girls.
Again the stalls are private and nobody is seeing you naked or peeing or anything.

Posted 10/6/17 11:20 AM
 

Mrs-D-Girl
Love my fur baby

Member since 8/07

5183 total posts

Name:

Re: Can we talk about public bathrooms..........

I am glad I am not the only one here because my Son is embarrassed in the Women's bathroom....I force him on occasion if we are at a very crowded public place but he doesn't love the idea.

Posted 10/6/17 11:29 AM
 
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