Wakes

Hi,

Do you bring your DC to open-casket wakes? If so, how old are they? TIA

Re: Wakes

I did not go to a wake until I was 17, and it was my grandfather. I went to funerals before that, but not to wakes

I don't think I would bring my DS until he was older as well - and he is 10 now

I don't think it's necessary

(Though I don't really believe wakes necessary either )

Wakes

it depends how close the person is.

i still regret my mom not letting me go to my aunt's wake. i think i was 11-12 ?

Re: Wakes

Growing up my parents always took us to wakes- no matter our age.

I took DD to my uncles wake because I had nobody to watch her- she was probably like 2 at the time.

I don't see it as a big deal.

Death is a part of life.
I was never sheltered from that as a child, so I don't really shelter my DD from it either

Wakes

Unfortunately my DS has been to many. We have lost way too many over the last few years. the most recent was my grandmother and was probably the only one he really remembers. He was fine that day...had many questions and we answered the best we could. I never thought about not taking him. IMO if I didn't take him there would be a lack of comprehending where grams went.

Re: Wakes

My kids are 9 and 7 and have never been. I have no plans to bring them to any so long as I can. The first wake I went to was my grandmothers when I was in my late 20's. My monlady both her parents when I was younger but they were cremated and no wakes

Wakes

My son (3) has been to 2-3 wakes.

Re: Wakes

My dd is 4 and I didn't take her to the wake for my grandmother a few months ago. I felt like she can't comprehend what actually happened so I didn't think she needed to see it. I wanted her to remember the things we did together while she was alive. I didn't want that to be her last memory. My younger cousin was about that age when his grandfather passed and I remember him asking when he was gonna wake up. So they just don't get it. I hope I don't have to bring her until she's much older.

Message edited 8/10/2017 1:01:04 PM.

Wakes

Depends on the age, but my DD is 6 and I would not bring her to a wake. The funeral yes, but not the wake.

Wakes

Absolutely! My daughter has gone quite a few times over the past few years and she's now 5. We discuss it openly and I think it's healthy. If it made her afraid I wouldn't but it's a part of life.

Re: Wakes

Re: Wakes

Recently, I went to two events: a funeral and a wake.
Both were close family/friends (but not our immediate family).
At both of them, the grandchildren and great grandchildren were not there (ages 4-10).
To one, I brought a 1 year old.
To the other, just myself.
I'm glad I left my other 2 home.

It's very culture dependent.

Message edited 8/10/2017 10:12:17 PM.

Wakes

Dd is 4 and has been to 3 wakes. She understands death as much as she can. I was never sheltered from it and I don't shelter my kids from death either. It's a big part of life unfortunately.

Re: Wakes

I lost 3 of my grandparents within a 2 year period when I was around 13-15. While I was definitely old enough to go the wake, I kind of wish I didn't have that memory of seeing them like that. Not sure what I will do with my kids when the time comes. Don't want to shelter them from that reality but I really don't like the process of wakes in general.