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Cheeks24
Living a dream
Member since 1/08 8589 total posts
Name:
Cheeks
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No Bridal Registry
I highly doubt she sent out the invites. Everyone seems to be so pissed at the bride! 
Has she lived with her FH for a long time? Do they not need stuff? Maybe she didn't want a shower and her family wants to throw her one?
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Posted 3/2/14 12:43 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
mnmsoinlove
Mommy to 2 sweet girls!
Member since 3/09 8585 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: No Bridal Registry
Posted by wakemeup
What exactly is the point of a bridal shower if she isn't registered? I'm being totally serious.
I agree there really isn't a point. I feel like a lot of people come to a shower to see what the bride gets. Shower invites are going out in a few weeks with cards that request gift cards towards my fsil and brothers honeymoon. My mom is mortified but what can we do. I suggested she make a small registry they don't even really have a lot of stuff. I just think it's really strange. What on earth are they going to do at the shower for 3 hrs if they don't open gifts?
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| Posted 3/2/14 2:23 PM |
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sunnygirl
loving life
Member since 1/07 5413 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: No Bridal Registry
I don't agree with asking for gift cards and don't know what I would do, probably consult other friends going to the party
But everyone keeps talking about watching the bride open her gifts and I believe the new trend is to not even open the gifts anymore, my cousin requested everyone wrap on clear cellophane, she did show off gifts but I know others who just left gifts displayed on a table and people could see what she got since it was all wrapped in clear
Nobody wants to sit and watch the bride open gifts. Most people sit and talk and only pay attention when their gift is being opened anyway
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| Posted 3/2/14 3:01 PM |
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FirstMate
My lil cowboy
Member since 10/10 7789 total posts
Name:
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Re: No Bridal Registry
Posted by PearlJamChick
Its different but I'd be happy not to have to trek my ass to Bed Bath to get something.
Five minutes in Duane Reade and that's it? DONE!
I feel the exact same way!
At first read, I  and thought "how tacky". But then I thought of the convenience of stopping at CVS on the way to the shower to get a card and gift card and I thought  whoopee!
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| Posted 3/2/14 4:56 PM |
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AllyMally
LIF Adolescent
Member since 1/13 881 total posts
Name:
Alyson
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No Bridal Registry
I would give a gc. You don't know the reason behind why and does it really matter? Perhaps they found a bedroom set they love and are using money from the shower to buy it. Perhaps they are just greedy and don't need anything in particular but want something from the honeymoon. You just never know. One thread will bash a gc money asking bride and another will bash you for not getting what you registered for. I would rather give a $100 VISA gc that is wanted then $100 in protest gifts that won't be appreciated or used.
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| Posted 3/2/14 5:23 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54917 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: No Bridal Registry
Posted by sunnygirl
I don't agree with asking for gift cards and don't know what I would do, probably consult other friends going to the party
But everyone keeps talking about watching the bride open her gifts and I believe the new trend is to not even open the gifts anymore, my cousin requested everyone wrap on clear cellophane, she did show off gifts but I know others who just left gifts displayed on a table and people could see what she got since it was all wrapped in clear
Nobody wants to sit and watch the bride open gifts. Most people sit and talk and only pay attention when their gift is being opened anyway
I agree. Showers are TORTUROUS. Sitting there while they open sheets, towels, plates for hours? I would rather go to the dentist.
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| Posted 3/2/14 6:12 PM |
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JME78
LIF Adult
Member since 11/09 3672 total posts
Name:
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Re: No Bridal Registry
I just think that gift giving in general in our culture has gotten so out of hand. I hate that people just presume that they will get a gift and that its ok for them to ask for whatever they want.
The shower is a gift giving occasion, and I really didn't even want to register for my wedding shower - to me it felt presumptuous. I finally caved in due to extreme pressure from FH and our parents.
I didn't register or have a baby shower and you know what - I was so delighted and touched by all of the gifts that we received after our son was born. People put actual thought into them and I don't know - I guess it just makes it more special and meaningful.
Gift giving is not special at all anymore. People forget - ITS A GIFT, its not mandated or required. To ask for cash to me is just defeating the whole purpose.
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| Posted 3/2/14 7:42 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: No Bridal Registry
I just can't believe how worked up people are getting about this. Get a freakin gut card and call it a day!
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| Posted 3/2/14 9:20 PM |
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MrsG823
Just call me Mommy.
Member since 1/11 5570 total posts
Name:
S
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No Bridal Registry
I would just write a check- you know it is expected that you are going to bring a gift so if you want to avoid the fee on gift cards just give $$. I do not agree with asking for gift cards but the bride likely has NO CLUE what is in the invite--my bridal shower was a surprise and I had NO say in any of the details.
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| Posted 3/2/14 9:38 PM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19453 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: No Bridal Registry
One of my former college roommates is getting married soon. We are well out of our college years. She has lived on her own for so long that she really has everything you need for a house. I was fine giving her a check for her shower and I will give a check for her wedding too. She and her FH are paying for the wedding themselves. I feel like if you are well out of college the need for a traditional shower to establish a home really is not a necessity, but the bride absolutely deserves to be celebrated nonetheless. So I for one am fine with cash or GCs. At the end of the day a gift is a gift. You can decide what to give and how much to spend.
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| Posted 3/3/14 12:28 AM |
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Sash
Peace
Member since 6/08 10312 total posts
Name:
fka LIW Smara
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No Bridal Registry
Asking for a GF is tacky to me and I dont even follow any etiquette book. I just think if the bride doesnt want to register then that's her choice but I would never put on the invite: Please come BUT only give me this specific kind of gift card.
If it was me, I would get them a gift card. However, if it was a close friend, I would ask holy WTF? LOL
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| Posted 3/3/14 1:21 AM |
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halfbaked
LIF Adult
Member since 8/12 6937 total posts
Name:
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Re: No Bridal Registry
Of COURSE Amex/Visa gift cards are nice gifts. But to pretty much say all they want is money is tacky. A gift is a gift. I'd either get them something personalized or not go.
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| Posted 3/3/14 9:10 AM |
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Babyaholic
Thankful
Member since 6/09 1459 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: No Bridal Registry
I see it no differently than when a couple register for their honeymoon.
Many of the gifts I got I my shower I used once or never used at all. Such a waste, but had to 'register'. I'm all for gift cards
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| Posted 3/3/14 9:19 AM |
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MrsA714
Baby #2 is here!
Member since 8/07 8806 total posts
Name:
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Re: No Bridal Registry
Posted by NervousNell
Posted by sunnygirl
I don't agree with asking for gift cards and don't know what I would do, probably consult other friends going to the party
But everyone keeps talking about watching the bride open her gifts and I believe the new trend is to not even open the gifts anymore, my cousin requested everyone wrap on clear cellophane, she did show off gifts but I know others who just left gifts displayed on a table and people could see what she got since it was all wrapped in clear
Nobody wants to sit and watch the bride open gifts. Most people sit and talk and only pay attention when their gift is being opened anyway
I agree. Showers are TORTUROUS. Sitting there while they open sheets, towels, plates for hours? I would rather go to the dentist.
I love going to showers now! Leave the kids home with DH and I get out of the house and get to drink mimosas AND eat!!  
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| Posted 3/3/14 10:14 AM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54917 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: No Bridal Registry
That part I love. The food and the booze.
The watching of gift opening- TORTURE!!!!
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| Posted 3/3/14 10:26 AM |
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dpli
Daylight savings :)
Member since 5/05 13973 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: No Bridal Registry
Since I don't usually give cash for a shower, I would either buy a gift and give her a gift receipt or a gift card to BBB. As the gift giver, I choose to give what I want.
If she didn't want to register, why is she having a shower at all? I didn't have a shower because I was older and really didn't need a lot of stuff for our house. I did register, though, because if people were going to buy me gifts (some did when we got engaged) then I wanted to give them some direction and not be stuck with a bunch of stuff I couldn't return, that I would end up giving away or donating. IMO, if you don't register, you get what you get and you don't get upset, LOL.
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| Posted 3/3/14 10:32 AM |
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HoneyBadger
YourWorstNightmare.
Member since 10/06 15979 total posts
Name:
BahBahBlackJeep
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Re: No Bridal Registry
Posted by DiamondGirl
My lazy self would be thrilled with this easy option lol
This was my thought too!
I'm not sure how asking for GCs is really any different than registering? 
In both instances you're asking for something, in this case it's GC, with a registry it's housewares and stuff.
If asking for GCs is tacky, why isn't registering considered tacky? I know back in the day when I got married there were plenty of people who thought registering was just as bad/tacky.
ETA: I'm really surprised at how many people are saying they would blow this shower off because of the note about getting the bride GCs.
If you're close enough with this girl (or her STB DH) how could you in good conscience not go to her shower, regardless of what was asked for in the invitation?
First off, the bride isn't even running this shin dig so you have no idea if she even knows that went into the invitation and secondly I imagine she'd be pretty hurt if close friends and family just blew off her shower bc they didn't agree with how the shower was thrown or, more specifically, in this case what was being requested as a gift.
Message edited 3/3/2014 10:59:12 AM.
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| Posted 3/3/14 10:52 AM |
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HoneyBadger
YourWorstNightmare.
Member since 10/06 15979 total posts
Name:
BahBahBlackJeep
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Re: No Bridal Registry
Posted by blue11
I would also be irked that they asked for amex or visa cards. Thats pretty much asking for cash. The point of a bridal shower is to celebrate the start of their life together and to help them get started off as a married couple - I could understand there's reasons why they prefer cash (small apt, have everything etc) but had they just worded the insert differently it would come off much better. For example, would appreciate gift cards so when we have house.....or we are saving for furniture or a tv....or will use towards honeymoon. Anything other than just asking for cash.
I would get a gift card to target or BBB.
To be honest, that's not really what a shower is for, that's what a wedding reception is for.
The term shower is used because you're supposed to "shower" the bride to be with gifts.
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| Posted 3/3/14 10:56 AM |
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bunnyluck
LIF Adult
Member since 1/14 3196 total posts
Name:
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No Bridal Registry
I understand the why have a shower if you arent registered and already have a lot of stuff arguement. But sometimes it's out of the bride to be's control. Speaking from personal experience I really did not want a bridal shower, I had been living with my DH for a few years and we had a LOT of stuff already. And plus, showers in general are just not my thing - I feel funny having people buy me stuff - I have the attitude that if I want a toaster I will go but it myself. But anyway, when the time came I expressed all that to my mother and was adamant that I did not want one and SHE broke down in tears. I am her only daugher and I guess I can understand why sharing that experience and milestone was important to her. So basically what I am saying is don't be so quick to assume a bride is just out for cash and gifts... who knows why she is having it? Maybe it's really a milestone her mother or someone always dreamed of.... Sometimes I just feel like people are so quick to assume the worst in people, lol. Live and let live ladies.
Message edited 3/3/2014 11:02:23 AM.
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| Posted 3/3/14 10:59 AM |
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eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
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Re: No Bridal Registry
That's tacky.
If it were a close friend, I'd tell her that's tacky.
If it wasn't a close friend I probably wouldn't go.
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| Posted 3/3/14 11:04 AM |
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MarisaK
HELLO Manolo !!
Member since 5/06 14562 total posts
Name:
Marisa
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Re: No Bridal Registry
I don't see the big deal - You're going to give a gift regardless, so to ME, a gift is something you think/know the person will enjoy or need/use - NOT what YOU thnk they should have .......
If you purchase off of a registry, you're getting them exactly what they picked out - so what's the difference in giving a GC at your own choice of price point instead?
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| Posted 3/3/14 2:36 PM |
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OnlyU12
LIF Toddler
Member since 8/13 431 total posts
Name:
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Re: No Bridal Registry
Posted by MarisaK
I don't see the big deal - You're going to give a gift regardless, so to ME, a gift is something you think/know the person will enjoy or need/use - NOT what YOU thnk they should have .......
If you purchase off of a registry, you're getting them exactly what they picked out - so what's the difference in giving a GC at your own choice of price point instead?
EXACTLY!!!!!!!!!
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| Posted 3/3/14 3:13 PM |
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Mrs-Boop
My Babies
Member since 5/05 4956 total posts
Name:
Jaime
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Re: No Bridal Registry
I don't see the big deal. Maybe they have not gotten a place together yet or have not been able to agree on something or find what they like and they don't want to register for stuff just to get it. They easily could have gone to bed bath and beyond, registered for a bunch of stuff and returned it after the shower.
At least with gift cards they can shop for stuff to fill their new place together at their own pace.
Could always get a gift card and small gift to go with it.
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| Posted 3/3/14 9:23 PM |
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buttercup
St. Jude pray for us...
Member since 1/11 2951 total posts
Name:
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No Bridal Registry
I think it so tacky.. but I've seen it so many times that I don't even think twice anymore. Sad part is that, people started putting it on birthday invites too.. ugh
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| Posted 3/4/14 8:43 AM |
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