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children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

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meloyellow
LIF Adult

Member since 3/13

1843 total posts

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children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

I'm curious to hear peoples views on this. Every time I'm in the shower DS (almost 21 months) comes in the bathroom and opens the curtain and then says "up, up" If I tell him "no, mommy is showering now" he cries and basically won't take no for an answer until I pick him up and put him in the shower with me. It's fine for now but at what age do you start "covering up"?

I'm kind of torn...I'm a very laid back, natural person and bc I generally sleep in just panties when I wake up if I have to run to the bathroom or grab a towel or whatever...I'm usually topless. on one hand I want my son to be comfortable with the human body and I want to be careful not to make him feel that the body is dirty or shameful in any way...but I also think about the future when he goes to school and what he'll say to friends etc. or how other people may view it. I'm looking a bit further into the future I know...just curious if anyone else struggles with this issue and how to handle it.

Posted 3/25/13 11:28 PM
 
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MichLiz213
Life is Good!

Member since 7/07

7937 total posts

Name:

children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

My DS is the same age as yours and I still get dressed with him in the room. As he gets older and more verbal we'll be more conscious of privacy.

My mom mentioned that she stopped giving my brother and I baths together (we're 12 and a half months apart) when I started asking questions about his anatomy. I was about 2 and a half. I may handle it the same way.

Posted 3/26/13 12:23 AM
 

yankinmanc
Happy Days!

Member since 8/05

18208 total posts

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children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

I think it's good for Kids to see their parents naked, I think it teaches them that people come in all shapes and sizes, and to respect other people, I think it up to the kid, if it becomes uncomfortable for them then
You can think about it. I come from a naked family, so nudity doesn't bother me.

My kids are 3 and 7 and they still bath together, they love it. They will let me know when they have had enough.

Message edited 3/26/2013 6:13:53 AM.

Posted 3/26/13 6:13 AM
 

Kissy331
My two miracles!

Member since 5/06

17826 total posts

Name:
Kristen

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

My boys are 3.5 & 2.5. They see me naked almost daily bc I get dressed in the am in my room. On a rare occasion they see me actually shower. It doesn't bother me bc like pp said, it shows them everyone is shaped differently. My oldest will ask questions about my anatomy & I explain boys have different then girls. They still bathe together for ease. As they get older, I will monitor the situation & make adjustments as necessary.

Posted 3/26/13 6:47 AM
 

sfp0701
Liam's Mommy!

Member since 1/07

9764 total posts

Name:
Tricia

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

My DS is almost 4 and still sees me naked. On occasion he will shower with DH or I if we are in a rush. He hasn't asked any questions yet. So until then I guess I don't have any problems with it.

Posted 3/26/13 7:48 AM
 

wingsofsong
My 3 little loves <3<3<3

Member since 1/09

7395 total posts

Name:
Maureen

children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

I remember reading (I think in the "What to Expect" toddler book) that you should start covering up once they begin to ask questions about the different parts. That being said, I don't necessarily have a plan for myself with my kids. My son is 3, and sees my breasts all the time because he sees me nursing his brother. I am more modest about the nether regions, though.

Posted 3/26/13 8:12 AM
 

Jonsgirl04
Love my two girls! xoxo

Member since 9/08

6079 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

My DD is 3 and sees me naked everyday I change. She has asked questions about my chest or my bra and I just tell her they are boobies and when your a very big girl you will have them too and her response was "oh" and that was the last time she asked me. LOL..My DH doesnt like letting her see him naked though so he doesnt change in front of her.

Posted 3/26/13 8:27 AM
 

MrsG72907
Mommy of 2 girls!

Member since 5/10

2046 total posts

Name:

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

My DD is 16 1/2 months and I am always naked in fron of her. She thinks it's funny for some reason and is fascinated by my "boobies." She pats her chest whenever she sees them. I don't up have any plans of ever stoppingn being naked in front of her. We are both females, so I don't see an issue. It was always like this in my house growing up between me, my mom and sisters. DH on the other hand is another story. He has NEVER been naked in front of DD. He says he feels "weird" bc she is a girl. In contrast, he grew up in a very reserved household in the nudity dept.

Posted 3/26/13 8:30 AM
 

nycgirl
Angels!

Member since 3/09

7721 total posts

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Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

Posted by yankinmanc

I think it's good for Kids to see their parents naked, I think it teaches them that people come in all shapes and sizes, and to respect other people, I think it up to the kid, if it becomes uncomfortable for them then
You can think about it. I come from a naked family, so nudity doesn't bother me.

My kids are 3 and 7 and they still bath together, they love it. They will let me know when they have had enough.



I agree with this.

Nothing wrong with the human body & it's good to see there are differences. The more you are exposed, IMO, the more normal it gets.

When DS noticed that I didn't have a penis (at about 2), I told DH he should be naked more often (male vs female). It worked & now DS understands that his sister is different from him because she's a girl.

Posted 3/26/13 9:06 AM
 

w8andsee
LIF Adult

Member since 10/09

1163 total posts

Name:

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

I would make a conscience effort not to be naked around my son when we start talking about private parts and privacy. (I’m thinking that starts around 3?)

However if he walked in on me as I was getting dressed or in the shower, I wouldn’t make a big deal of it, but then take it as an opportunity to talk about privacy.

Now I have an additional question, do you have a difference of opinion if it was your DH walking around naked in front of your DD?

I’m asking because my friend and I have had this conversation and that was a question that came up. (My friend just would walk around naked in front of her son. Ex: come of the shower, then just go into the kitchen naked for a drink of water and may even have a conversation with her son. I believe he was 5 at the time.)

Posted 3/26/13 9:28 AM
 

JennZ
MY LIFE!!

Member since 8/05

25463 total posts

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children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

When my son pointed at my boobs and said "those are your boo boos" i was over him seeing them. I teach him we all need our privacy when dressing.

Posted 3/26/13 9:49 AM
 

justonemore
LIF Zygote

Member since 1/13

48 total posts

Name:

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

DS is a boob boy. Once he discovered them and realized I had them I started to cover up. He was 3 at the time.

Posted 3/26/13 9:55 AM
 

JennyPenny
?

Member since 1/08

12702 total posts

Name:
Jen

children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

DH and I still showe with our 3.5 year old DD. She has asked questions a time or two but doesn't focus. She's more interested in playing 'McDonalds' while we are showering.

Posted 3/26/13 10:10 AM
 

Ian&EmmesMommy23
My family is complete!

Member since 11/08

12964 total posts

Name:
Diana

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

my son is 3.5 and still sees me naked. he learns there's nothing to be ashamed of. he knows i have boobies and he doesn't. he asks me where my penis is and i explain mommy has a vagina. then he'll ask me...so when i get older i can be a girl and have a vagina too? Chat Icon Chat Icon i just tell him he can be whatever he wants to be. Chat Icon

Posted 3/26/13 10:36 AM
 

BriBri2u
L'amore vince sempre

Member since 5/05

9320 total posts

Name:
Mrs. B

children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

My son is 2.5 and I still change in front him and once in awhile bring him in the shower with me.

I can see he is starting to see a difference between mommy and daddy by his inquistive staring while I'm changing. I think it's important for him to know about privacy as well, so we'll start explainging that soon.

Posted 3/26/13 10:55 AM
 

summertime
LIF Adolescent

Member since 9/10

852 total posts

Name:

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

When my son asked me where my weiner was I thought it was time to stop showering with him. haha He was around 3.


When I am in the shower they may come in and ask a question, I remind them mom needs privacy. They are all boys 7, 6 and 3 and really uninterested but all the same, I ask for privacy and they understand.

My husband is less shy about it but if we had girls he definitely would be. He has said he would never let his daughter see him naked!

Posted 3/26/13 11:41 AM
 

DRMom
Two in Blue

Member since 5/05

20223 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

It becomes unacceptable when they are uncomfortable. Our boys are 4.5 and we are still naked around them when necessary.

Posted 3/26/13 11:43 AM
 

headoverheels
s'il vous plaît

Member since 6/07

42079 total posts

Name:
LB

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

I think it's a personal decision. I haven't let DS see me naked since he was 4, other people are much more comfortable with nudity. I am not, nor have I ever been Chat Icon DD is 3, and I will still shower with her if I need to, but I don't like it.

To be honest I don't think there is anything harmful about letting a child see you nude, even if they are of the opposite sex, but it's not something I will ever be comfortable with because of my own feelings on nudity. Hope that makes sense.

Posted 3/26/13 12:04 PM
 

jennielee15
Let's try this again....

Member since 7/11

2269 total posts

Name:
Jennie

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

I'm still pregnant with my first so I can't tell you what I will do, but I can tell you that my mom use to throw me in the shower with her until I was 9 or 10, It wasn't all the time but I do remember it not being a big deal. I know my brother used to have his daughter in the shower with him, but that was only until probably 1, I think it's different for a man with a daughter....But I am very comfortable naked, so I'm sure my kids will see both DH and myself in our birthday suits on occasion...I feel that modesty can be taught later on, and again it depends on who it is.....With mommy and daddy it's a personal choice, with other adults, be modest....

Posted 3/26/13 12:10 PM
 

Eireann
Two ladies and a gentleman!

Member since 5/05

12153 total posts

Name:

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

Oh man, I'm having an anxiety attack reading these replies...I am SO NOT a naked person and either is my DH. I'm just imagining the therapy I'd need to be involved in if my dad (or mom, for that matter) walked around with his balls out. Chat Icon

That said, my youngest is a 2.5 year old boy and he's frequently in the room when I get dressed in the morning. I don't mill about naked anyway, but the most exciting thing he's noticed are my tattoos. I would say 3-3.5 is when I'd start shutting it down. I've never bathed with my kids--girls or boy--that's the final frontier of my privacy and I would never give that up!

Posted 3/26/13 12:23 PM
 

meloyellow
LIF Adult

Member since 3/13

1843 total posts

Name:

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

What would you do if your child tried to nurse from your boob as a toddler? would that make you stop letting them see you naked? or would you just address is and say "sorry honey, there's nothing left in there, all gone!" and continue living the way you normally do? This happened once and I was a bit taken aback bc our time breastfeeding was short lived and I didn't even think he would remember it. I handled it with the phrase above and continued normally...it hasn't happened again since. but it definitely made me think about this subject a bit more.

Posted 3/26/13 12:39 PM
 

Champ
2 little ladies

Member since 1/11

2918 total posts

Name:
Rose

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

Posted by meloyellow

What would you do if your child tried to nurse from your boob as a toddler? would that make you stop letting them see you naked? or would you just address is and say "sorry honey, there's nothing left in there, all gone!" and continue living the way you normally do? This happened once and I was a bit taken aback bc our time breastfeeding was short lived and I didn't even think he would remember it. I handled it with the phrase above and continued normally...it hasn't happened again since. but it definitely made me think about this subject a bit more.



This would not change my very open view. I would tell them that there is no more milk in there and go about my day.

Posted 3/26/13 12:45 PM
 

CrankyPants
I'm cranky

Member since 7/06

18178 total posts

Name:
Mama Cranky

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

Posted by Eireann

Oh man, I'm having an anxiety attack reading these replies...I am SO NOT a naked person and either is my DH. I'm just imagining the therapy I'd need to be involved in if my dad (or mom, for that matter) walked around with his balls out. Chat Icon

That said, my youngest is a 2.5 year old boy and he's frequently in the room when I get dressed in the morning. I don't mill about naked anyway, but the most exciting thing he's noticed are my tattoos. I would say 3-3.5 is when I'd start shutting it down. I've never bathed with my kids--girls or boy--that's the final frontier of my privacy and I would never give that up!



You and I are like one with this, every time it comes up!

I'm honestly never naked in front of my DS and my DH is never naked in front of the grils. Even with my girls, if there is a need to me to change quickly, I do it but cover up as much as possible and am as efficient as possible too.

We are just not a naked household.

Posted 3/26/13 2:21 PM
 

MrsPorkChop
Twinning!!

Member since 5/05

9941 total posts

Name:
Missy

children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

we dont walk around naked at all in front of our kids. ever. i also will not be showering with them. just not our thing. no judgement.

Posted 3/26/13 2:38 PM
 

JenBenMen
party of five

Member since 9/06

11343 total posts

Name:
Jen

Re: children seeing you naked. When does it become unacceptable?

i am guilty of walking around in my undies and bra with my 5 and 4 year old boys watching

we live in a small 2 bedroom and I literally run around like a mad woman getting them ready and getting myself ready for work

They yell "Boobies",,,and ask about why i dont have a penis.....ok, so maybe its time to stop thisChat Icon

Posted 3/27/13 9:27 PM
 
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