Dear.....

Lets hear those today "dears"...

Dear Nasty Elosia at NS LIJ Billing,

Thank you for getting rude & loud with me and hanging up on me when I question why I am getting charged a copay. My "consultation" for when they found something on my level II was billed incorrectly according to my insurance and you have the nerve to get nasty with me.

Thanks,
Hung up on Preggers

P.S.
Cant wait until I see what I have to pay after delivery. Im sure you will mess up that bill too.

Re: Dear.....

Dear Heartburn,

Please just leave me alone, I can't deal with you especially after I drink water!! What the heck is that about?

Thanks!
Heartburn Hater

Re: Dear.....

Dear Taco Bell,

Please begin delivering.

Thanks,
Fatty Girl

Re: Dear.....

Dear Cankles,

Please go away.

Thank you!

Signed,
Tree trunk legs

Re: Dear.....

Dear Sciatic Nerve,

I have been aware of your existence since I herniated a disk in my back 10 years ago. I don't need to be reminded of your existence EVERY time I move! Please calm down and stop hurting me.

KTHXBYE

Re: Dear.....

Dear Bloody/Congested Nose,

You can return to normal at any time! I am tired of blowing my nose and/or walking around with tissues stuffed up it to stop the bleeding. I am so tempted to cut you off right now!

Sincerely,
Would like to breathe again!!!

Re: Dear.....

Dear Progesterone In Oil Shots,

PLEASE (TMI) let me be able to go to the bathroom! this is KILLING me!

Thank you,

Re: Dear.....

Dear Sciatica,

Oh how I hate you so... Please go away, you have been with me for 5 too many weeks now, and I really dont want to deal with you anymore.

Thanks,
Preggo who can barely walk.

Re: Dear.....

Dear Restless Leg Syndrome,
Thankyou for coming to visit me during this pregnancy as well as my last. But I think it's safe to say that after 3 mos of you preventing me from sleeping you can go back to the part of hell you came from. I promise to throw a party when you depart.

Love,
The preggo who feels like she has ants on her

Re: Dear.....

Dear Jerk Who Pushed Me Into Closing Subway Doors This Morning,

I hope you get crushed by the train you rude jerk!



Signed,

The Clearly Preggo Who You Tried 2 Use as a Door Prop

Re: Dear.....

Dear DH,

Don't get nasty with me because you brother is not confirmed and can't be a godparent unless he does it before our son is christened. I did not make up the rules. You would think the way your emotions are going haywire that I'm not the only preggo in the house.

Sincerely,
Your increasingly irritated wife

Re: Dear.....

Dear Lipa,

Please, please, please turn my power back on. Im a tired 8 month pregnant teacher who commutes 45 minutes a day. It got too cold to sleep at home with my two other kids so now we are all sleeping on my mother's pull-out couch. My back hurts
Now I'm stuck at parent/teacher conferences all night. It would be great if I could go home after this never-ending day and sleep in my own bed tonight.

Thank you,

Re: Dear.....

Dear SIL and BIL (not that you even deserve this title),

You are lucky we are not on speaking terms because after what you did last night to MIL, I would have gone apesh!t on you.

You are pathetic worthless excuses for human beings.

Signed,

Your SIL who doesn't put up with your sh!t and that's why you don't like me.

Re: Dear.....

Dear Natioanl Grid,
Being preg is stressful enough - I don't need to be camping out at my parents while you turn my power back on.

Love,
The girl sleeping in a small bed with DH

Re: Dear.....

Dear Zofran,

Please aleviate my nausea as you are supposed to do. Lately you haven't been working up to my standards.

Thank you,
Pukey Von Puke

Re: Dear.....

Dear upstairs neighbors with horse feet,


What the hell are you up doing at all hours of the night?! Is it your goal to see how much crap you can drop between the time I go to bed, and the time I get up? I really dislike the two of you, and think you are jerks for reasons more than your horse feet. Stop making so much damn noise all the time!!!


Love,

The cranky pregnant woman in the condo below you, who can't wait to close on her new home in May and get the hell out of here.

Re: Dear.....

Dear Migraine-

I've been trying to deal with you for a few weeks now without the use of drugs. But today you are making it impossible for me to work and look at my screen. Please go away!

Signed,

Cranky Preggo

Re: Dear.....

Dear heartburn/acid reflux,

Please leave me alone at night so I can go to sleep. I feel you creeping up into my throat and it really doesn't feel good, I would like to at least be able to fall asleep at a normal hour

Re: Dear.....

Dear Cervix,

Please stop being lazy and start dilating already. I have waited 39 weeks to meet my baby and you're the only thing standing in my way.

Sincerely,

The impatient preggo

Re: Dear.....

Dear Baby,

I know you must think I am nutty for asking, but please, please send me a symptom or 2, so that I know you are doing ok in there.

Signed,
Your mommy who is praying you're growing well

Re: Dear.....

Dear DH,

Stop ******* snoring!!! I have a hard enough time sleeping without having to listen to you. When I ask you to roll over just do it!!! Don't argue with me and fall back asleep without rolling over because then I will have to just kick you again!

Love,

Your wife who sleeps better on the train than in her own bed!

Message edited 3/16/2010 5:39:04 PM.