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Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

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itsbabytime
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Member since 11/05

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Me

Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

And, I just wanted to post b/c from reading these boards I feel like a lot of people think their children need to be more advanced than they are at a certain age...DS could do all of this b/f 18 months but, the ped said he is def. ahead - which, from reading these boards I would think he was just average - so the verbal questions were:

Does DC say more than 20 words?
Does DC speak in fragments - put 2-3 words together?

That was it speaking wise - I was shocked - I thought they were going to expect words in the hundreds and speaking in sentances!

Anyway, just wanted to pass this along since I know many mommies get worried about these things!

Message edited 10/10/2009 7:30:05 PM.

Posted 10/10/09 7:29 PM
 
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Alex110879
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Member since 8/06

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Alexandria

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

see now my ped expected alot for the 1 year and i was suprised.. she expected ds to have atleast 10-15 words and told me he was delayed because he only says mama, dada, up, and baba... though she also said he was delayed because he wasnt walking at 12 months so who knows

Posted 10/10/09 7:43 PM
 

itsbabytime
LIF Adult

Member since 11/05

9395 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by Alex110879

see now my ped expected alot for the 1 year and i was suprised.. she expected ds to have atleast 10-15 words and told me he was delayed because he only says mama, dada, up, and baba... though she also said he was delayed because he wasnt walking at 12 months so who knows



That is definitely more than my ped asked at the 1 year visit - I don't remember since it was a whole year ago but, it was definitely under 10 words - definitely. And, DS didn't walk until 13 months - I asked at the 12 month visit and the ped said they don't start becoming concerned about walking until 16 months.

Posted 10/10/09 7:48 PM
 

cjik
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Member since 2/06

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Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

When DS had his evaluation with EI, they told me something similar--I think it was 25 words at 2 years, plus two words together. They also mentioned he should try to initiate speech with us and should mimic us by that age. I asked because his evaluators told me he seemed borderline, and they would have done another evaluation at 2 years if he didn't qualify for therapy.

He did wind up qualifying for speech therapy, but the expectations for a child of 2 are not huge.

Posted 10/10/09 7:54 PM
 

itsbabytime
LIF Adult

Member since 11/05

9395 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by cjik

When DS had his evaluation with EI, they told me something similar--I think it was 25 words at 2 years, plus two words together. They also mentioned he should try to initiate speech with us and should mimic us by that age. I asked because his evaluators told me he seemed borderline, and they would have done another evaluation at 2 years if he didn't qualify for therapy.

He did wind up qualifying for speech therapy, but the expectations for a child of 2 are not huge.



I forgot - they did say also initiating speech and imitating us...

Honestly, I was VERy shocked at the quesitons myself.

Posted 10/10/09 7:57 PM
 

KateDevine
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Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by Alex110879

see now my ped expected alot for the 1 year and i was suprised.. she expected ds to have atleast 10-15 words and told me he was delayed because he only says mama, dada, up, and baba... though she also said he was delayed because he wasnt walking at 12 months so who knows



A child is not delayed if they don't walk at 12 months. The average age for walking is 12-15 months.

Posted 10/10/09 8:28 PM
 

maybesoon
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Member since 9/09

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Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by KateDevine

Posted by Alex110879

see now my ped expected alot for the 1 year and i was suprised.. she expected ds to have atleast 10-15 words and told me he was delayed because he only says mama, dada, up, and baba... though she also said he was delayed because he wasnt walking at 12 months so who knows



A child is not delayed if they don't walk at 12 months. The average age for walking is 12-15 months.



my DS is almost 13 months and not walking, certainly not delayed. people worry about this stuff way too much and want to label a kid "delayed"

Posted 10/10/09 8:29 PM
 

cjik
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Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

People naturally like to talk about their children's accomplishments, and I think you hear about children putting together small sentences and reciting the alphabet by 2 years, so you start to assume your child is behind if they they aren't doing these things.

I do think if parents are concerned, they should contact EI about an evaluation. It can't hurt, and if anything is wrong, better to get it treated early than later.

But the basic expectations for children this age aren't as high as I had read elsewhere.

Posted 10/10/09 8:33 PM
 

Kerie-is-so-very
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K

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

I think that both LIF and discussions with other parents lead us all to believe that milestones should happen so early. Also, a lot of parents whose kids are older seem to have edited their memories. My mom always tells me that my grandmother used to keep changing her story about when my dad was potty trained. It got younger and younger as the years went on.

Posted 10/10/09 8:49 PM
 

MommaG
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Gloria

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

I find it happens a lot at pre-school also. The parents wait to pick up their children and at times the conversation is about my child can write her name or mine can read or write their numbers from one to ten or mine can count to one hundred. If your child can't do those things you think your child is behind, but when you speak with the educators and your pediatrician they will tell you those children are ahead in development and it is not the norm. It doesn't mean a child who is not doing those things at three and fours years old is not intelligent, but they all develop at different speeds and have their own talents and skills.

Posted 10/10/09 9:13 PM
 

Palebride
I am an amazing bakist

Member since 5/05

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Name:
Lori

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by Alex110879

see now my ped expected alot for the 1 year and i was suprised.. she expected ds to have atleast 10-15 words and told me he was delayed because he only says mama, dada, up, and baba... though she also said he was delayed because he wasnt walking at 12 months so who knows



Your doctor sounds a little out of touch.

Posted 10/10/09 9:17 PM
 

Phyl
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Member since 5/06

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The Mystical Azzhorse! ™

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by Kerie-is-so-very

I think that both LIF and discussions with other parents lead us all to believe that milestones should happen so early. Also, a lot of parents whose kids are older seem to have edited their memories. My mom always tells me that my grandmother used to keep changing her story about when my dad was potty trained. It got younger and younger as the years went on.


My XMIL told me that she had my XH potty trained at 9 months.Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 10/10/09 9:29 PM
 

Porrruss
Nya nya nya

Member since 5/05

11618 total posts

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Amy

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by Palebride

Posted by Alex110879

see now my ped expected alot for the 1 year and i was suprised.. she expected ds to have atleast 10-15 words and told me he was delayed because he only says mama, dada, up, and baba... though she also said he was delayed because he wasnt walking at 12 months so who knows



Your doctor sounds a little out of touch.



10-15 words at a year is a stretch. To call a child delayed is completely inappropriate. First words aren't expected until *at least* 10-13 months. Meaning that 1 word at 1 year is perfectly fine.

Posted 10/11/09 9:26 AM
 

headoverheels
s'il vous plaît

Member since 6/07

42079 total posts

Name:
LB

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by Porrruss

Posted by Palebride

Posted by Alex110879

see now my ped expected alot for the 1 year and i was suprised.. she expected ds to have atleast 10-15 words and told me he was delayed because he only says mama, dada, up, and baba... though she also said he was delayed because he wasnt walking at 12 months so who knows



Your doctor sounds a little out of touch.



10-15 words at a year is a stretch. To call a child delayed is completely inappropriate. First words aren't expected until *at least* 10-13 months. Meaning that 1 word at 1 year is perfectly fine.



it's very hard for me to constantly read posts about babies walking and talking at 10 months or younger because DS is 13 months, not walking (although he is cruising) and only has two works (mama and dada).

it's nice to know that he's just normal, not delayed. he has way more comprehension than i would expect from a 13-month old so i'm hoping he will catch up soon.

ETA: compared to all of his friends he was "late" in his milestones - he didn't crawl until 10 months and didn't have his first word until around that age as well. but i have nothing else to compare him too. as per his ped, he's developing well, but it's still hard to see kids younger than he is so much more advanced. Chat Icon

Message edited 10/11/2009 9:40:18 AM.

Posted 10/11/09 9:38 AM
 

FelAndJon
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Member since 6/05

10212 total posts

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Felice (aka LuckyBride2004)

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by Phyl

Posted by Kerie-is-so-very

I think that both LIF and discussions with other parents lead us all to believe that milestones should happen so early. Also, a lot of parents whose kids are older seem to have edited their memories. My mom always tells me that my grandmother used to keep changing her story about when my dad was potty trained. It got younger and younger as the years went on.


My XMIL told me that she had my XH potty trained at 9 months.Chat Icon Chat Icon



I am pretty sure my MIL is convinced DH was walking, talking, potty trained and performing open heart surgeries as he came out of the womb Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 10/11/09 9:38 AM
 

pickles16
Real Estate Professional

Member since 11/07

17227 total posts

Name:
Jen

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by FelAndJon

Posted by Phyl

Posted by Kerie-is-so-very

I think that both LIF and discussions with other parents lead us all to believe that milestones should happen so early. Also, a lot of parents whose kids are older seem to have edited their memories. My mom always tells me that my grandmother used to keep changing her story about when my dad was potty trained. It got younger and younger as the years went on.


My XMIL told me that she had my XH potty trained at 9 months.Chat Icon Chat Icon



I am pretty sure my MIL is convinced DH was walking, talking, potty trained and performing open heart surgeries as he came out of the womb Chat Icon Chat Icon




Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Kerie I couldn't agree with you more, I sometimes find myself worrying (and then subsequently posting) about milestones...I'm prob one the most laid back ppl but sometimes "comparing" makes me freak out...My mom claims I was potty trained at 12 months and bought DD a potty and wants me to put her on it now at 10 monthsChat Icon

Posted 10/11/09 9:46 AM
 

KateDevine
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Member since 6/06

24950 total posts

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Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by headoverheels

ETA: compared to all of his friends he was "late" in his milestones - he didn't crawl until 10 months and didn't have his first word until around that age as well. but i have nothing else to compare him too. as per his ped, he's developing well, but it's still hard to see kids younger than he is so much more advanced. Chat Icon



No, he is just Christopher's mini meChat Icon

LB, you've seen Christopher, he was the same way, trust me, in NO time he will be running and won't shut up and you will want to kill yourself, just like I doChat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 10/11/09 9:51 AM
 

Porrruss
Nya nya nya

Member since 5/05

11618 total posts

Name:
Amy

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by headoverheels

it's nice to know that he's just normal, not delayed. he has way more comprehension than i would expect from a 13-month old so i'm hoping he will catch up soon.

ETA: compared to all of his friends he was "late" in his milestones - he didn't crawl until 10 months and didn't have his first word until around that age as well. but i have nothing else to compare him too. as per his ped, he's developing well, but it's still hard to see kids younger than he is so much more advanced. Chat Icon



Your little guy sounds PERFECTLY normal.

My firstborn didn't walk unassisted until 14/15 months. Her first *true* word (baba for bottle) wasn't until about 12 months of age. She was saying baba much earlier, but I didn't count it as a word until she actually used it to LABEL her bottle.

Saying mama and dada don't truly count as a word until it's used in context (e.g. they point at mom and say mama consistently). BTW-baba, mama, and dada are actually early developing consonant vowel combinations that ALL babies produce indiscriminately at first.

Now on the flip side, my second baby started pulling up by 6 months, cruising by 7/8 months, and took her first steps at 9 months. At 11 months, she is full on walking now. I attribute this to her being a second baby who is intent on following her big sister everywhere. She's also a moose and has been ridiculously active since the first time I felt her kick.

Her verbal skills aren't any more advanced than I saw with #1, but she babbles like crazy. I'm not expecting any real words for some time though.

My point is- the range of normal is incredibly broad when it comes to motor and speech/language development. It's hard to remember that though when it seems like everyone else's kid can do things yours can't.

Posted 10/11/09 9:51 AM
 

headoverheels
s'il vous plaît

Member since 6/07

42079 total posts

Name:
LB

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by Porrruss

My point is- the range of normal is incredibly broad when it comes to motor and speech/language development. It's hard to remember that though when it seems like everyone else's kid can do things yours can't.




this is exactly it! he understands things that i NEVER would expect him to, i personally think he is developing well and is just stubborn. but it's really hard for me because i can't help but compare him to the other babies i see. thank you for this.

and thanks to you too, Kate Chat Icon

Posted 10/11/09 9:54 AM
 

pickles16
Real Estate Professional

Member since 11/07

17227 total posts

Name:
Jen

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by headoverheels

Posted by Porrruss

My point is- the range of normal is incredibly broad when it comes to motor and speech/language development. It's hard to remember that though when it seems like everyone else's kid can do things yours can't.




this is exactly it! he understands things that i NEVER would expect him to, i personally think he is developing well and is just stubborn. but it's really hard for me because i can't help but compare him to the other babies i see. thank you for this.

and thanks to you too, Kate Chat Icon



I do the same exact thingwith DD and we have to stop my ped actually always tells me how well she's doing, but I always find myself comparing with other kids!!!

Posted 10/11/09 9:56 AM
 

jellybean78
:)

Member since 8/06

12738 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by cjik

People naturally like to talk about their children's accomplishments, and I think you hear about children putting together small sentences and reciting the alphabet by 2 years, so you start to assume your child is behind if they they aren't doing these things.

I do think if parents are concerned, they should contact EI about an evaluation. It can't hurt, and if anything is wrong, better to get it treated early than later.

But the basic expectations for children this age aren't as high as I had read elsewhere.



I agree with this. I think there is too much comparing going on...each kid is individual and learns at his or her own pace. Each kid has a different environment and learns from that environment at their own pace. Seriously...in 18 years it won't matter that someones kid started walking 4 months before mine did or said his ABCs at 11 months.Chat Icon

Posted 10/11/09 10:02 AM
 

Porrruss
Nya nya nya

Member since 5/05

11618 total posts

Name:
Amy

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by headoverheels

Posted by Porrruss

My point is- the range of normal is incredibly broad when it comes to motor and speech/language development. It's hard to remember that though when it seems like everyone else's kid can do things yours can't.




this is exactly it! he understands things that i NEVER would expect him to, i personally think he is developing well and is just stubborn. but it's really hard for me because i can't help but compare him to the other babies i see. thank you for this.

and thanks to you too, Kate Chat Icon



When Madelyn was about a year old, I was a little put off by the fact that she wasn't using any real words. I mean, I am a speech-language pathologist!!! You'd think I'd have a talking genius on my hands. Nope. She still developed her speech at her own pace.

Up until she turned 2 a large part of her speech still consisted of jargon (where they sound like they're talkiing another language) with lots of words and phrases thrown in. Her receptive language skills, and her ability to produce lots of sound combinations were perfectly normal so I knew she was fine. But- without my professional background I might have been more concerned.

Now- she still uses jargon, but the majority of her speech is mostly understandable.

Posted 10/11/09 10:04 AM
 

CookieMomster
Golden

Member since 5/09

6414 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

What we all need to remember is no two children are the same. Every child does things at diffrent times of their lives. When they are comfortable. Enjoy them being their cute little selves. Relish in them.

Posted 10/11/09 10:04 AM
 

saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!

Member since 5/05

16555 total posts

Name:
I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...

Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

I agree with the OP, I think that we expect our kids to do things that other kids arer doing, no matter what.

We took DD for her 2 year appt last week and the ped was happy with her vocabulary. She was chattering away in the office, after her exam. He asked if she put words together, we told him yes. She can say "mommy coffee, "daddy's car," etc. She can put more words together but he was just asking in general, not for the words she says.

I think she is right where she needs to be, not where my nephew or a friends baby is, kwim?

Posted 10/11/09 11:05 AM
 

bayla
Love my two kiddos :)

Member since 8/06

7178 total posts

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Re: Was really surprised at DS's 2 year visit the questions they asked re: verbal abilities...

Posted by maybesoon

Posted by KateDevine

Posted by Alex110879

see now my ped expected alot for the 1 year and i was suprised.. she expected ds to have atleast 10-15 words and told me he was delayed because he only says mama, dada, up, and baba... though she also said he was delayed because he wasnt walking at 12 months so who knows



A child is not delayed if they don't walk at 12 months. The average age for walking is 12-15 months.



my DS is almost 13 months and not walking, certainly not delayed. people worry about this stuff way too much and want to label a kid "delayed"



ITA my DS is not delayed and was a late walker and an early talker. He didnt walk till around 16-18 months. Now granted his verbal skills and fine motor skills have always been early/ahead, so I tended to think he was focusing so hard on those skill, that the walkng was pushed to the back for a while for him.
Now at 27 months, he runs, jumps, climbs, does stairs, and is soo active (as well as still so talkative LOLOL). my doctors werent concerned (I was though naturally as a parent) as they felt it was more that he wasnt doing it b/c he didnt want to versus a motor issue (he would crawl, cruise, climb things, take steps when he felt like it, etc) one day he just decided it was time and started walking and never stoppedChat Icon
I think there it to much expectations of kids and that they will all do it on their own. Plus all the comparing that parents do doesnt help.

Message edited 10/11/2009 11:19:38 AM.

Posted 10/11/09 11:15 AM
 
 
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