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middle school- missing school?

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phoenix913
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

2991 total posts

Name:
V

Re: middle school- missing school?

Posted by lululu

Posted by phoenix913

I don’t have a kid in middle school yet, but I would go. Personally family time, educational or not, is more important to our family. Everyone’s priorities are different and that’s ok. I would be worried about the rules surrounding Unexcused absences though so I’d check into that first.

Some of these responses are ridiculous. Going on a cruise or to Disney isn’t worth it because it’s too “Americanized”? Ugh



But why can't you plan family time for when school is out? Going to school and also carving out time for family vacations aren't mutually exclusive. As far as I know the kids are only in school around 180 days a year. That leaves more than HALF the days of the year to plan a vacation.




Because we don't want to that's why. For us the extra expense, crowds etc are not worth it just because of school. We vacation when it's convenient for my and my husband's work schedules and when we can afford it. School does not factor into the equation. That's just our opinion. It's fine to do it your way too.

We don't expect any accommodations from the teacher. I let them know when we'll be gone and ask if there's anything they'd like us to do while gone.

Posted 10/30/19 10:56 AM
 

JandJ1224

Member since 6/06

5748 total posts

Name:
Jannette

Re: middle school- missing school?

My daughter is in 6th grade. Our district has a policy that work missed for unexcused absences is a 0. That would significantly impact even the brightest students average.

With that said 6th grade isn't going on your transcripts for college so if you think this family time is a priority go for it!

Posted 10/30/19 11:16 AM
 

jamnmore
LIF Adult

Member since 6/16

967 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

Posted by Dreamer27

This is so important- a life skill. As a college professor, I’ve seen the results of this down the road. I’ve had students expect me to give them makeup midterms or extra time on projects because they were tacking extra days on to their spring break- one didn’t accept his failing grade and appealed to the provost with plane tickets as “evidence” he was “owed” an exception (didn’t work). I’ve seen students crash and burn on internships because they “didn’t like” the early hours or pass up incredible opportunities to stay late and finish a project that could clinch a job offer, all because something more “fun” was waiting in the wings. These students have a very hard landing when they’re in their first real world jobs and have to work holidays or weekends.

Chat Icon

Posted 10/30/19 11:23 AM
 

Straightarrow
LIF Adult

Member since 2/11

3342 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

Posted by phoenix913

Posted by lululu

Posted by phoenix913

I don’t have a kid in middle school yet, but I would go. Personally family time, educational or not, is more important to our family. Everyone’s priorities are different and that’s ok. I would be worried about the rules surrounding Unexcused absences though so I’d check into that first.

Some of these responses are ridiculous. Going on a cruise or to Disney isn’t worth it because it’s too “Americanized”? Ugh



But why can't you plan family time for when school is out? Going to school and also carving out time for family vacations aren't mutually exclusive. As far as I know the kids are only in school around 180 days a year. That leaves more than HALF the days of the year to plan a vacation.




Because we don't want to that's why. For us the extra expense, crowds etc are not worth it just because of school. We vacation when it's convenient for my and my husband's work schedules and when we can afford it. School does not factor into the equation. That's just our opinion. It's fine to do it your way too.

We don't expect any accommodations from the teacher. I let them know when we'll be gone and ask if there's anything they'd like us to do while gone.



You might change your mind when your children get to middle school

Posted 10/30/19 1:29 PM
 

NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..

Member since 11/09

48292 total posts

Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!

Re: middle school- missing school?

Posted by Straightarrow

Posted by phoenix913

Posted by lululu

Posted by phoenix913

I don’t have a kid in middle school yet, but I would go. Personally family time, educational or not, is more important to our family. Everyone’s priorities are different and that’s ok. I would be worried about the rules surrounding Unexcused absences though so I’d check into that first.

Some of these responses are ridiculous. Going on a cruise or to Disney isn’t worth it because it’s too “Americanized”? Ugh



But why can't you plan family time for when school is out? Going to school and also carving out time for family vacations aren't mutually exclusive. As far as I know the kids are only in school around 180 days a year. That leaves more than HALF the days of the year to plan a vacation.




Because we don't want to that's why. For us the extra expense, crowds etc are not worth it just because of school. We vacation when it's convenient for my and my husband's work schedules and when we can afford it. School does not factor into the equation. That's just our opinion. It's fine to do it your way too.

We don't expect any accommodations from the teacher. I let them know when we'll be gone and ask if there's anything they'd like us to do while gone.



You might change your mind when your children get to middle school



True! I have heard people say once their kids get to middle school they don't WANT to miss school for vacation because it's a huge stress on them when they get back. (i think someone on this thread actually said that about her DD)
So in that case going on vacation during the school year for the simple reason that "YOU WANT TO" is kind of selfish because it's putting undue stress on your child.

Message edited 10/30/2019 1:38:07 PM.

Posted 10/30/19 1:37 PM
 

Straightarrow
LIF Adult

Member since 2/11

3342 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

Posted by NervousNell

Posted by Straightarrow

Posted by phoenix913

Posted by lululu

Posted by phoenix913

I don’t have a kid in middle school yet, but I would go. Personally family time, educational or not, is more important to our family. Everyone’s priorities are different and that’s ok. I would be worried about the rules surrounding Unexcused absences though so I’d check into that first.

Some of these responses are ridiculous. Going on a cruise or to Disney isn’t worth it because it’s too “Americanized”? Ugh



But why can't you plan family time for when school is out? Going to school and also carving out time for family vacations aren't mutually exclusive. As far as I know the kids are only in school around 180 days a year. That leaves more than HALF the days of the year to plan a vacation.




Because we don't want to that's why. For us the extra expense, crowds etc are not worth it just because of school. We vacation when it's convenient for my and my husband's work schedules and when we can afford it. School does not factor into the equation. That's just our opinion. It's fine to do it your way too.

We don't expect any accommodations from the teacher. I let them know when we'll be gone and ask if there's anything they'd like us to do while gone.



You might change your mind when your children get to middle school



True! I have heard people say once their kids get to middle school they don't WANT to miss school for vacation because it's a huge stress on them when they get back. (i think someone on this thread actually said that about her DD)
So in that case going on vacation during the school year for the simple reason that "YOU WANT TO" is kind of selfish because it's putting undue stress on your child.




It's a hard lesson to learn. Last year when my son was in 6th we were lax about sick days, etc. and he had too many absents for Arista which sucked. This year he has been very diligent

Posted 10/30/19 2:29 PM
 

isabelle2137
LIF Adult

Member since 12/06

1074 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

If I thought my kid could handle it, I would go. I was in a similar situation years ago and decided against taking the trip with extended family. To this day I still regret it every time my relatives talk about it. We missed out on a lot of memories. There are people that went on that trip that are no longer here, and I regret it on that front too.

Would I do it every year? No. But life is short and IMO at the 6th grade level there is still plenty of time to reinforce the importance of education.

Posted 10/30/19 4:32 PM
 

Sash
♥4Yrs Strong♥

Member since 6/08

8029 total posts

Name:
fka LIW Smara

Re: middle school- missing school?

Posted by jamnmore

Posted by Dreamer27

This is so important- a life skill. As a college professor, I’ve seen the results of this down the road. I’ve had students expect me to give them makeup midterms or extra time on projects because they were tacking extra days on to their spring break- one didn’t accept his failing grade and appealed to the provost with plane tickets as “evidence” he was “owed” an exception (didn’t work). I’ve seen students crash and burn on internships because they “didn’t like” the early hours or pass up incredible opportunities to stay late and finish a project that could clinch a job offer, all because something more “fun” was waiting in the wings. These students have a very hard landing when they’re in their first real world jobs and have to work holidays or weekends.

Chat Icon



I feel like this is so extreme, you can still pull your kids out of school and reinforce good work ethic and stress the importance of school.

To me kids that grow up with entitlement is from a multitude of reasons. Same can be said to parents who request their kids be put in classrooms with their friends or write a letter to the teacher explaining why their kid wasn’t able to finish their homework and request an extension. It sounds like the ops child is an excellent student, so I’m sure he understands the importance of test and schoolwork

Posted 10/30/19 4:54 PM
 

lululu
LIF Adult

Member since 7/05

7181 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

Posted by phoenix913

Posted by lululu

Posted by phoenix913

I don’t have a kid in middle school yet, but I would go. Personally family time, educational or not, is more important to our family. Everyone’s priorities are different and that’s ok. I would be worried about the rules surrounding Unexcused absences though so I’d check into that first.

Some of these responses are ridiculous. Going on a cruise or to Disney isn’t worth it because it’s too “Americanized”? Ugh



But why can't you plan family time for when school is out? Going to school and also carving out time for family vacations aren't mutually exclusive. As far as I know the kids are only in school around 180 days a year. That leaves more than HALF the days of the year to plan a vacation.




Because we don't want to that's why. For us the extra expense, crowds etc are not worth it just because of school. We vacation when it's convenient for my and my husband's work schedules and when we can afford it. School does not factor into the equation. That's just our opinion. It's fine to do it your way too.

We don't expect any accommodations from the teacher. I let them know when we'll be gone and ask if there's anything they'd like us to do while gone.



Yes,maybe for one trip that's fine. But the OP wants to take her child out for 15+ days of unexcused absences. There are actually laws regarding it - they are called truancy laws.

I have to admit your statement that school doesn't factor into the equation makes me cringe. I honestly can't imagine not taking EXCESSIVE absences into consideration when planning multiple vacations in one year. We aren't talking about a couple of days here and there - we are talking about 15 days. I'm also the type of person that never called in sick (unless I'm contagious with something more than a cold) and I can count on one hand the amount of classes I skipped in college, so maybe that's my hang up.

Posted 10/30/19 5:00 PM
 

Mags1227
Just a mommy ...

Member since 10/10

2522 total posts

Name:
M

Re: middle school- missing school?

you said aruba can't be re-scheduled, so i would go.
for the cruise, i would leave my kids at home with my DH and go by myself to celebrate my aunt.
disney would be out of the question.

this way your DS only misses 6 days for one trip and you still get to celebrate your aunt.

EDITED FOR SPELLING

Message edited 10/30/2019 5:40:59 PM.

Posted 10/30/19 5:40 PM
 

ali120206
2 Boys

Member since 7/06

15396 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

Posted by Sash

Posted by jamnmore

Posted by Dreamer27

This is so important- a life skill. As a college professor, I’ve seen the results of this down the road. I’ve had students expect me to give them makeup midterms or extra time on projects because they were tacking extra days on to their spring break- one didn’t accept his failing grade and appealed to the provost with plane tickets as “evidence” he was “owed” an exception (didn’t work). I’ve seen students crash and burn on internships because they “didn’t like” the early hours or pass up incredible opportunities to stay late and finish a project that could clinch a job offer, all because something more “fun” was waiting in the wings. These students have a very hard landing when they’re in their first real world jobs and have to work holidays or weekends.

Chat Icon



I feel like this is so extreme, you can still pull your kids out of school and reinforce good work ethic and stress the importance of school.

To me kids that grow up with entitlement is from a multitude of reasons. Same can be said to parents who request their kids be put in classrooms with their friends or write a letter to the teacher explaining why their kid wasn’t able to finish their homework and request an extension. It sounds like the ops child is an excellent student, so I’m sure he understands the importance of test and schoolwork



I agree.

We take our kids out for vacations but have them do work while we are away and we stress that it’s a special treat.

My 4th grader constantly tells me how people in his classes get picked up early and how parents tell their kids how they don’t have to do certain things for school for no good reason. He had two kids in his class last year that never did homework... I think that makes people feel that school is unimportant more than taking kids out of school for vacations.

Posted 10/30/19 8:33 PM
 

BargainMama
LIF Adult

Member since 5/09

14494 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

So in our district, the Superintendent actually encourages you to spend time as a family,and has no issues with you pulling your child out for a family vacation. So even educators think that a family vacation and spending quality time together is important. They don't give zeros for missed work, or any of that nonsense. Family time IS important, and not everyone can go away on a school break when the cost of a vacation literally doubles and triples. Like I said previously in this thread though, I wouldn't have my child miss *that* much school, because it's just too much work to make up at the middle school level. I don't think missing school for a trip is going to make your kid grow up to be an irresponsible derelict in society though like some of these responses imply Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 10/31/19 7:57 AM
 

lululu
LIF Adult

Member since 7/05

7181 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

Posted by BargainMama

So in our district, the Superintendent actually encourages you to spend time as a family,and has no issues with you pulling your child out for a family vacation. So even educators think that a family vacation and spending quality time together is important. They don't give zeros for missed work, or any of that nonsense. Family time IS important, and not everyone can go away on a school break when the cost of a vacation literally doubles and triples. Like I said previously in this thread though, I wouldn't have my child miss *that* much school, because it's just too much work to make up at the middle school level. I don't think missing school for a trip is going to make your kid grow up to be an irresponsible derelict in society though like some of these responses imply Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon



I actually don't think anyone implied that missing a few days here and there for a vacation was bad. At least I didn't read it that way. But three trips is a lot.

Posted 10/31/19 9:16 AM
 

Straightarrow
LIF Adult

Member since 2/11

3342 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

Posted by lululu

Posted by BargainMama

So in our district, the Superintendent actually encourages you to spend time as a family,and has no issues with you pulling your child out for a family vacation. So even educators think that a family vacation and spending quality time together is important. They don't give zeros for missed work, or any of that nonsense. Family time IS important, and not everyone can go away on a school break when the cost of a vacation literally doubles and triples. Like I said previously in this thread though, I wouldn't have my child miss *that* much school, because it's just too much work to make up at the middle school level. I don't think missing school for a trip is going to make your kid grow up to be an irresponsible derelict in society though like some of these responses imply Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon



I actually don't think anyone implied that missing a few days here and there for a vacation was bad. At least I didn't read it that way. But three trips is a lot.



Yes, I agree with this. I don't think anyone really is saying NEVER take time, it's the fact that it is really 3 weeks of school. Not counting any other absences. I don't think the superintendent means that.

I think everyone agrees family time is important and it IS ok to take some time if it needed. But what the OP is saying is excessive.

Posted 11/1/19 11:39 AM
 

Christine2
LIF Adolescent

Member since 2/09

894 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

Personally I would not have my child miss that much school. Even in elementary school I try not to have them miss more than 1-2 days at a time. That's almost 3 weeks in total. Too much, IMO.

Posted 11/8/19 1:35 AM
 

KateBennetReel
LIF Infant

Member since 10/15

362 total posts

Name:
Keep

Re: middle school- missing school?

We take our kids out of school for family time. Once a year, for 5 days. Usually the week before a break. It's usually a slow week (at least at the elementary level), and they get back when everyone else does. I do see this changing as school work grows, but it works for us right now. I think 1 missed a total of 14 days last year and that includes sick days.

You do you. What works for some, might not work as well for others.

Posted 11/8/19 4:12 PM
 

aliwnec10
mom of 3 boys

Member since 4/06

11272 total posts

Name:
Ali

Re: middle school- missing school?

Posted by KateBennetReel

We take our kids out of school for family time. Once a year, for 5 days. Usually the week before a break. It's usually a slow week (at least at the elementary level), and they get back when everyone else does. I do see this changing as school work grows, but it works for us right now. I think 1 missed a total of 14 days last year and that includes sick days.

You do you. What works for some, might not work as well for others.



Thank you!!!

Posted 11/8/19 4:16 PM
 

aliwnec10
mom of 3 boys

Member since 4/06

11272 total posts

Name:
Ali

Re: middle school- missing school?

Just to respond to some replies...

-my husband is a police officer so we do have to consider his schedule as well, when going on vacations. My job too. So it's not as simple as some might think. Going in the summer really isn't doable for us.
-in regards to the fall vacations and those that say that's not appropriate either... several of my teacher friends have said that's the best time to go versus the 2nd half of the school year.
-my kids are very active in sports as well. So to some extent that does play a role in when we go since we tend to go in between them.
-Many of my sons school work is online now on google classroom and the teachers pages. They posts all homework assignments and reading. So for those that say it's considerate of me, that's not a fair statement. Especially when they don't have to prepare anything in advance. Chat Icon
-last year my son missed 1 day of school. 1 sick day. Not to say that that doesn't change year to year but he's not one who gets sick often.


I have spoken to all my sons teachers about our trip next week. All of them have said they don't think he'll have 1 issue at all because he's such a strong student.

I appreciate everyone's responses. It's always nice getting other viewpoints.
We have not decided yet. I'm leaning towards no but we'll see.

However if i can say one thing. To those that never let their kid miss 1 day of school for something fun, vacation or anything other than sick days... i would bend a little on that. Life is too short. Yes school is important but so are the moments we make. No one is really going to look back on their life and say... "i wish i went to school more or i wish i worked more. Those few days really made a difference." lol. They're going to wish for time. More time with loved ones. So don't be afraid to let go a little and take it all in. Chat Icon

I'm sure i'll get flamed for this but some of the posts kind of made me sad. Life is too short to not enjoy it and bend the rules- just a tad. Just sometimes. Before you know it, your kid will be in high school and then they'll be gone. Your window is limited...

Posted 11/8/19 4:37 PM
 

Mrs213
LIF Adult

Member since 2/09

17062 total posts

Name:

middle school- missing school?

Honestly in my opinion it is too much. Sickness is one thing but 15 days for vacations is not good. It starts to affect their academics when they miss that much school...

Posted 11/8/19 7:52 PM
 

Mrs213
LIF Adult

Member since 2/09

17062 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

Posted by lululu

Posted by phoenix913

I don’t have a kid in middle school yet, but I would go. Personally family time, educational or not, is more important to our family. Everyone’s priorities are different and that’s ok. I would be worried about the rules surrounding Unexcused absences though so I’d check into that first.

Some of these responses are ridiculous. Going on a cruise or to Disney isn’t worth it because it’s too “Americanized”? Ugh



But why can't you plan family time for when school is out? Going to school and also carving out time for family vacations aren't mutually exclusive. As far as I know the kids are only in school around 180 days a year. That leaves more than HALF the days of the year to plan a vacation.




For me it would not work. I don’t have much seniority at work so rarely get approved any vacation time for the school vacations. But hey I never go anywhere so it doesn’t matter at this point Chat Icon

Posted 11/8/19 8:06 PM
 

FirstMate
My lil cowboy

Member since 10/10

6416 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

I am all for pulling my kids out to go on vacation. It's less crowded and far more affordable. That being said, at the middle school level, I don't know that I would do 3 vacations with that many days. You know your son best so if you think he can handle it, do it. It's one year and, let's face it, it's 6th grade. Hello! If he is a strong student, he will be fine.

I also don't buy into some of the logic of some of these responses. Missing school as a middle schooler to go on a family vacation is not going to directly cause a child to become an entitled azzhole who doesn't know how to prioritize life changing work over spring break in Cancun. That attitude stems from far beyond a family vacation in middle school.

Also, we take 2-3 vacations a year too with some mini trips in the interim. We love to get away. I would never trade my 2-3 trips for one trip on a break where I'm surrounded by thousands of people and paying top dollar to do so. No thanks.

Message edited 11/19/2019 2:39:21 PM.

Posted 11/19/19 2:30 PM
 

MerryChristmas
LIF Toddler

Member since 2/16

490 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

Instead of missing 3 days for Disney can you leave Friday after school or even pull him out in the middle of the day so it doesn't count as an absence? and come back Monday so he is only missing one day of school?
Otherwise I would pass on Disney only because you have so many other vacations already planned.

Posted 11/19/19 10:41 PM
 

ziamaria
I love this boy!

Member since 4/07

3345 total posts

Name:

middle school- missing school?

odd one out, life is short, make the memories.

Posted 11/21/19 3:01 AM
 

charon54
My two boys!

Member since 5/05

7241 total posts

Name:
Rebecca

Re: middle school- missing school?

Our school district will not allow teachers to prepare work in advance for unexcused absences, the kids have to make it up afterwards. My son (5th grade - but middle school) would die having to make up all that work!

Posted 11/21/19 4:04 PM
 

2BadSoSad
LIF Adult

Member since 8/12

6785 total posts

Name:

Re: middle school- missing school?

I'm pro - take your kids out for vacations at any age as long as they wont fall behind but even for me that's A LOT of school to miss for vacations. I wouldn't pull them out for more than 5 days total for vacations, especially in middle school. No way would I let them miss 3 weeks of school for vacations, that seems excessive. Even for my elementary school child, where its a lot less to catch up on if you miss, I still wouldn't remove her for more than a week for a vacation.

Posted 11/22/19 10:34 AM
 
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