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how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

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jburke322
LIF Adolescent

Member since 3/08

663 total posts

Name:
Jessica

how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

Just wondering, I am so undecided on ttc for # 2. We have been trying for the past 2 months and no luck. My DD is 20 months and i find it so hard. Me and my DH work different scheduals I only get to see him Thursday night and Sat & Sun morning until about 2. I find it really hard to be sort of like a "single working parent" even though I am not. I feel like I have to go through everything alone, the shopping, the cooking the cleaning. i know i would still be doing all of that if my dh was home but it is harder that he is not.
I just feel like i am not that ready to bring a baby into the mix. the only reason I am having a hard time deciding all of this is bc i wanted my kids to be close in age. I am so confused. Anyone have any suggestions. I feel like I am loosing my mind.

Posted 11/2/08 7:22 PM
 
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Goldi0218
My miracles!

Member since 12/05

23902 total posts

Name:
Leslie

Re: how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

If you want an honest answer, it sounds to me that you are not ready yet. It may not be the answer you want to hear but that is what I am getting from reading your post. If you are undecided to TTC and you feel like the bulk of the responsibilities will fall on you, then you may have answered your own questions.

Posted 11/2/08 7:25 PM
 

hazeleyes33
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

13060 total posts

Name:
Ginger

Re: how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

My kids are 5 years apart. Finances was our main reason. We could not afford 2 kids in daycare.
It was and still hard having 2 no matter that they are so many years apart.
Best of luck in your decision :)

Posted 11/2/08 7:27 PM
 

ChrisDee
My Girls

Member since 11/06

9543 total posts

Name:
Christine

Re: how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

My kids are 7 years apart(Gods plan, not ours) I wanted our kids to be close too, but it was not meant to be for us. There are a lot of pluses to the big gap and DD#1 adores DD#2 in a way that is unique and incredible. She is a tremendous help and I do not burden her with having to help, she wants to help. I was crushed while trying to conceive DD#2 that they were not going to be close in age, but I have come to love my situation.

Posted 11/2/08 9:35 PM
 

hbugal
Lesigh

Member since 2/07

15928 total posts

Name:

Re: how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

My eldest daughter and my twins are 5 years apart exactly....then there is 8 1/2 years in between the twins and DS.

It works....it really does. No matter what the age difference is between your children it works....they are still siblings and the bond that holds them together is sitll there.

Posted 11/2/08 9:44 PM
 

Lucky
Growing up fast!

Member since 4/07

12683 total posts

Name:
Dawn

Re: how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

My children will be 2.5 years apart when I give birth in April. Just like you, I didn't want there to be too much time in between.

I do understand your hesitation though. It sounds like you are in a difficult situation with your DH's work hours. I'm sure you will both decide what will be the best decision for your family!Chat Icon

Posted 11/2/08 9:46 PM
 

mypumpkin
It's a beautiful day! :)

Member since 7/08

2296 total posts

Name:
Dee

Re: how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

My dh too works long hours!! He leaves by 5:30 am and doesn't get back until after the kids are asleep! I had my first 2 babies really close together(2 yrs apart) and it was hard doing everything! I felt like each day lasted a miliion years!Chat Icon You get through it though and as soon as one of them turns 4 life gets much easier!! There is a 9 year span between my 2 and 3 and I am totally enjoying every minute of having just one baby again--so much fun with one!!!Chat Icon
Also my helpers have been amazing-one son is the fun and games helper and the older one can do feeding,changing,watching him(so I can get a shower)!!!Chat Icon

Posted 11/2/08 10:02 PM
 

ddunne2
LIF Adult

Member since 7/05

4189 total posts

Name:
Doreen

Re: how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

I have a two and four year old exactly two years apart. I think close in age and further apart in age both have positive aspects. If we have a third it will be in a few years and I think having a baby and 4 and 6 year old will be perfect!

Posted 11/2/08 10:08 PM
 

GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!

Member since 11/06

26738 total posts

Name:
Shawn

Re: how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

Our two are almost exactly 3 years apart (same birth month). There are pros and cons to every age span. Close together, and you can reuse car carriers, car seats, etc. The are almost the same age, so they play together with the same age interests. Sorta close in age (3-5 or so), they are still relatively close in age, so after the youngest is around 3, they can play together. No overlap in diaper changing. The older one is a role model, and usually looks after the younger. College tuition is spaced out a bit.
More than 5 years apart, the oldest can help out with the younger one. Odds are slimmer that teachers will say "Oh, you're so and so's little sibling", and treat you different. You get a break between growth stages. Oldest is relatively independent for a few years before you have midnight feedings, changing diapers, and carrying the youngest.

Posted 11/3/08 8:14 AM
 

Summersalwaysinseason
I'm finally able to write here

Member since 1/06

2044 total posts

Name:

Re: how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

My DDs are 4 years apart...

I had a bad miscarriage in between (right before DDs 2nd birthday) and wasn't ready to start trying for a little while after that...

Then it took me almost a year to get preggo with DD#2...

It's a nice age difference - DD helps a lot and understands when I need to give my attention to the baby.

I hope they are close when they get older...

Posted 11/3/08 9:54 AM
 

nylisa
My Children

Member since 5/05

7905 total posts

Name:
MaMa

Re: how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

By time the I have DC #2, Michael will be 2 1/2 years old.

Posted 11/3/08 10:13 AM
 

MrsG41307
LIF Adult

Member since 11/07

936 total posts

Name:
Dyanne

Re: how far apart in age are your kids? Sorry it is kinda long

My kids are 14 years apart..LOL...hubby and I would like to have another baby soon...because we are getting older...

Posted 11/3/08 12:04 PM
 
 

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