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Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

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liv3008
LIF Zygote

Member since 5/08

9 total posts

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Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

My in laws watch the baby 2 days a week (mon & thurs) for us and both my husband and I worry about the way my father in law handles the baby...he is not very sturdy with her, she always looks like she is gonna fall out of his arms and we just are not 100% comfortable with him handling her...however my mother in law is great with her....so here is my issue.....My parents who watch the baby 3 days a week (tues,weds, friday)....well my parents are going away next week and they want to watch the baby Mon and Tues and then my in laws will have her for the following 3 days....
So when I dropped the baby off this morning my father in law says to me (after he practically drops her taking her out of the car seat) "we are gonna need the car seat next week since we have her 3 days in a row" so I say okChat Icon then he says "we wanna be able to take her down to the marina" (they have a boat)...SO here is where I think I might be overreacting......I DO NOT WANT THEM TAKING MY DAUGHTER ON THE BOAT without my husband or myself being there.......What do I do?? Do we ask them not to take her on the boat or do we just let them??

Posted 6/5/08 9:23 AM
 
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nbc188
Best friends!

Member since 12/06

23090 total posts

Name:
C

Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

I would not let them take her on a boat, personally. I would tell them that you're not comfortable with it, or have your DH tell them since they're his parents.

ETA: It's one thing if they want to take her to walk around down by the marina (not near the water, maybe on the outskirts of the marina), or show her the boat, but it's another thing to take her onto the boat, IMO.

Message edited 6/5/2008 9:26:16 AM.

Posted 6/5/08 9:25 AM
 

2PreciousBlessings
The Perfect Pair

Member since 5/06

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Best Wife & Mommy

Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

It's very nice of to watch DC but I would NOT BE COMFORTABLE with them taking DC on a boat. So, no you are not overreacting at all.

Posted 6/5/08 9:26 AM
 

JerseyMamaOf3
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Member since 6/05

15144 total posts

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Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

Posted by nbc188

I would not let them take her on a boat, personally. I would tell them that you're not comfortable with it, or have your DH tell them since they're his parents.

ETA: It's one thing if they want to take her to walk around down by the marina (not near the water, maybe on the outskirts of the marina), or show her the boat, but it's another thing to take her onto the boat, IMO.



ITA! how does your dh feel about it?

Posted 6/5/08 9:27 AM
 

Lucky
Growing up fast!

Member since 4/07

12683 total posts

Name:
Dawn

Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

Posted by nbc188

I would not let them take her on a boat, personally. I would tell them that you're not comfortable with it, or have your DH tell them since they're his parents.

ETA: It's one thing if they want to take her to walk around down by the marina (not near the water, maybe on the outskirts of the marina), or show her the boat, but it's another thing to take her onto the boat, IMO.



I agree. I would want to be there if DD goes on the boat.

Posted 6/5/08 9:28 AM
 

KateDevine
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Member since 6/06

24950 total posts

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Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

Ok, I need more info first.

1. Do they have a life vest for her?
2. Do they mean take her out on the boat or just take her to the marina for lunch or something like that?

If they want to take her out on the boat, I'd politely decline and say that you or DH want to be there. If they are just bringing her to the marina to have lunch or check out the boat for another reason, then I'd say fine.

My neice was on on my SIL's inlaws boat when she was 9 months old in a life vest and it was fineChat Icon

Posted 6/5/08 9:28 AM
 

liv3008
LIF Zygote

Member since 5/08

9 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

Posted by Seles81

Posted by nbc188

I would not let them take her on a boat, personally. I would tell them that you're not comfortable with it, or have your DH tell them since they're his parents.

ETA: It's one thing if they want to take her to walk around down by the marina (not near the water, maybe on the outskirts of the marina), or show her the boat, but it's another thing to take her onto the boat, IMO.



ITA! how does your dh feel about it?



He does not know yet, I have not talk to him yet this morning.

Posted 6/5/08 9:30 AM
 

liv3008
LIF Zygote

Member since 5/08

9 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

Posted by KateDevine

Ok, I need more info first.

1. Do they have a life vest for her?
2. Do they mean take her out on the boat or just take her to the marina for lunch or something like that?

If they want to take her out on the boat, I'd politely decline and say that you or DH want to be there. If they are just bringing her to the marina to have lunch or check out the boat for another reason, then I'd say fine.

My neice was on on my SIL's inlaws boat when she was 9 months old in a life vest and it was fineChat Icon



No we do not have a life vest for her and they want to take her ON the boat...I dont have a problem with them taking her to the marina but its the whole boat thing that is bothering me.

Posted 6/5/08 9:32 AM
 

pnm1654
Mommy to 2 boys!

Member since 5/05

4565 total posts

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Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

No I don't think you're overreacting. I totally agree with you. I would let your DH handle this and tell them that they can't take her on the boat.

Posted 6/5/08 9:34 AM
 

DmarieK
My loves!!

Member since 1/06

9203 total posts

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Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

I'm one who believes that family members who babysit should be able to take the baby where ever they need to go but definitely NEVER on a boat. I think you have every right to say you would rather they don't take him/her.

Posted 6/5/08 9:45 AM
 

SuzyQ
Mama to 3!?!?!?

Member since 7/06

8069 total posts

Name:
Susan

Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

Posted by nbc188

I would not let them take her on a boat, personally. I would tell them that you're not comfortable with it, or have your DH tell them since they're his parents.

ETA: It's one thing if they want to take her to walk around down by the marina (not near the water, maybe on the outskirts of the marina), or show her the boat, but it's another thing to take her onto the boat, IMO.



I agree. There is no way I would want them taking her on the boat without me or DH.

Posted 6/5/08 9:45 AM
 

DC HJJ M

Member since 8/07

3732 total posts

Name:
Crystal

Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

I dont think your overreacting. I would definetly not want dd on a boat either. Espcially if I wasnt already comfortable with the way the person who is taking her on it handles her in the first place.

Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 6/5/08 9:47 AM
 

HillW9608
Hello Summer!

Member since 5/08

5916 total posts

Name:
Hill

Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

I know how you feel when it comes to your father and handling the baby. My dad had very bad arthreitis.. he gets infusions and spine injections monthly.

Even since DD was very little my dad wasnt able to carry her. He would always hold her sitting down. It is sad, I wish it was different. Because of this reason I can only leave DD at my parents when my mom is home unless I run out while she is napping. You arent overreacting at all.. Chat Icon

Posted 6/5/08 9:54 AM
 

Bklyngrl
luvmyfamily

Member since 9/06

5307 total posts

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Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

i'd be concerned too... i'd have dh handle it

Posted 6/5/08 10:02 AM
 

Michelle
My Little Yankee Fans

Member since 1/06

4018 total posts

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Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

I would not be comfortable with that, but let DH handel it with them.

Posted 6/5/08 10:04 AM
 

2BEANS
wow time is going fast.

Member since 9/07

16106 total posts

Name:
Tina

Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

I would just explain to them that the idea of your dc being a boat not knowing how to swim and you and dh not being there is not something you want. Dont have to say its got to do with the fil not being sturdy, just the fact that you and dh would like to be there when dc is to go on boat.

Posted 6/5/08 10:08 AM
 

jambalady
Is it summer yet?

Member since 8/06

7392 total posts

Name:
Holly

Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

Totally not overreacting. I would not be comfortable with them taking the baby on the boat, especially if you do not have a life vest.

I would have DH talk to them.

Posted 6/5/08 11:01 AM
 

bella
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

1871 total posts

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Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

I don't think you are overreacting, you are the parents and ultimately have to make the right decisions for your child, whether your in laws like them or not. I know it can be tough (we have a similiar arrangment with my parents and in-laws) I would have either you or DH sit down with his parents and jsut explain to them , you are not comfortable with them bringing the baby on the boat and do not want dc on boat without one of you present. They should respect that and understand your feelings. I don't know what your relationship is with your inlaws but if there are things you don't like how they handle baby I found (after only five months) its best to address them when you see them, otherwise it starts to build up. I have on several occasions had some frank discussions with both my parents and his about particular issues and things I wanted done....don't get me wrong, I adore both our parents and can't thank them enough for taking care of DS but I still feel its my childs best interest to make sure they are adhering to our wishes. It is tough though, definitely not easy and I am always afraid of upsetting them so walk a fine line. Good luck, I hope it works out for you.

Posted 6/5/08 11:02 AM
 

Stefanie

Member since 5/05

23599 total posts

Name:
Stefanie

Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

Tell them you're not comfortable with her going on a boat without you or your dh.

I wouldn't be comfortable with it either.Chat Icon

Posted 6/5/08 11:05 AM
 

mommy0604
My Son is my world...

Member since 10/07

3270 total posts

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Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

I don't think you are overreacting at all...I would say no as well.

Posted 6/5/08 11:48 AM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you think I am overreacting?? a little long

If you don't have a life jacket, there should be no further discussion. No baby/child should ever be on a boat without one..period.

I would have DH call & tell them absolutely not. Be prepared that you may need to make alternate arrangements next week for child care.

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Posted 6/5/08 11:54 AM
 
 

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