Long Island Forums > Bereavement Support Group

My Dad sold the house

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Beth1210

that's it- there is nothing left of my former life

2 years has made such a difference- I am sure you girls understand-

this is hitting me harder then I expected- My Mom is gone, the house is gone- no one in my Family even lives on Long Island anymore

in a few moths s new family will be living in our house, the house my Mom and Dad built together- and the kicker is they a both teachers- just like my parents

I think I have been in deep denial- and it's all hitting me now

plus we lost a co-worker to breast cancer this week, 46 years YOUNG, I went to the wake - I couldn't stay- it was too upsetting

thanks for listening- Jake doesn't understand- he thinks it just a house- to me it was my family

 
Posted 8/4/06 10:17 PM
madden7706

I know exactly how you feel. My dad just remarried in October and just sold the house that we lived in and my mom died in. He wants to get rid of everything - to the point where I am taking all the family photos, her wedding dress, our baby clothes etc. He is moving to Jersey at the end of October with my brother who I have helped raised since he was 10. It makes me so sad b/c all I ever hear is how wonderful his new wife (never married, no kids) extended family is and I feel like he wants to forgot about his old life. Sometimes I understand b/c the memories are too painful but he needs to realize that my brothers and I won't ever forget. I feel like once he moves to Jersey with the new wife, we will never see him. Plus, I teach in the town where my house is, so I see it everyday. Chat Icon

My heart goes out to you - nobody gets it and that makes it even harder. Chat Icon

 
Posted 8/4/06 11:20 PM
Beth1210

thanks- My dad lives in florida- I am waiting for the Day he gets remarried- if he does- I am very close with him - and I understand he need to put this all behind him- I don't love going to the house- it's half empty and strange- it's like a ghost town-

this is it- the last part of our old life is gone-

I just feel like it's so unfair- we have/had a great family and now I feel like I am living in some alternate universe

I wake up in the morning sometimes and have to remind myself of everything

I haven't cried in so long, and I am sitting here crying my eyes out-

 
Posted 8/4/06 11:37 PM
Meaghan729

There are some people that after their spouse dies, they need to change their life as a way of coping. Others (like my mom) wount change a thing. It was probably too painful for your dad to live there without your mom.
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Posted 8/5/06 7:48 AM
stardiva80

That must be so hard for you. im sure i will feel the same way- im dreading cleaning out my parents' house with all of my moms stuff there. so sadChat Icon
..but you have to tell yourself (even if you dont believe it) that just because the house is gone doesnt mean your memories sre gone too . that part of your life will never be erased. i know it sounds cliche- but sometimes i have to tell these things to myself just to get through it- does that make sense? im sending you many hugs Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon its just so unfair

 
Posted 8/5/06 7:50 AM
dpli

I's tough, Beth , no doubt about it. I did a lot of cleaning out too, and it is a very strange feeling.

We know the people who bought the house and his mom has told my sister we are welcome to go and see what he has done with it - they dormered it. I told my sister that I have no desire to ever go in the house again. I can't imagine walking into MY house and seeing other people's stuff and decor. I know one of my brothers feels the same way.

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Posted 8/5/06 5:04 PM
oneday

Awe- Beth. I can't imagine how hard this is! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

 
Posted 8/8/06 8:40 PM