Okay, I feel a little silly asking this question...

but I guess this is what this board was created for...

Lately I just have no interest in sex.

Before we had the baby we were crazy -- and all throughout the pregnancy -- the hormones just made me want it more.

And after the pregnancy, for the first few weeks, it was that way also. We broke the "wait 6-8 weeks" rule by week 2.

So I don't understand what is wrong with me now. I feel so bad for DH because he initiates, and a lot of times I shut him down.

It's not like I don't want to be close and cuddle with him, I just don't feel like having sex.

And then when we do (don't get me wrong, we still do at least every week, but nowhere near as often as we used to) I think to myself "we need to do this more often..." but usually I just don't have the desire to do it.

Is this normal? I thought it was a pp thing but my daughter is 7.5 months old now. I don't know what I can do to make it change and I feel stupid asking my DR about it.

Now I am thouroughly embarassed...

don't be...there are plenty of times I don't want it but my grandma always gave me the advice of "never have a headache"

maybe if you do it more, you'll want it more....

can you leave emily overnight with someone and have a married with no baby night and act like you did before she came along??

Or even 3 hrs at a naughty no-tell motel?

I don't know anything about preggo...but maybe you're just TIRED from taking care of a little one. You enjoy it when you DO do it, but it's hard to get there, totally understandable, sounds like stress, exhaustion, etc.

Maybe there's a physiological reason too about pp hormones?

It could be that your hormones were out of control before and are now leveling off. Are you on BC pills?

not on BC -- I was on the ring and it made me horribly emotional and then on my last month on it my period never went away. i had my period for over a month straight and then i finally went off of it and after a week my PD tapered off. actually it was after that month of having my PD that the urge went away the most i think --- since we didn't do it at all during that time. but i'm about 3 cycles off of the BC ring now....

I would venture to guess that with all of the fluctuations your body had the past year, you've got your cause. I would definitely bring it up to your ob/gyn.

Melis- Im so glad you brought this up....


Since having Ryan my sex drive has pretty much diminished I feel horrible, because I know DH must feel neglected.... BUT Im just not interested...


I think alot of this has to do with the pill, and the FEAR of becoming pg. again too soon!

I was on the pill...and got off because of all the damn health risks and because it made me feel like an 80 yr old...no drive. Hormones svck!

If anything, I think this post proves this board was definitely needed.

Marissa -- I feel so bad for DH also --- like I'm not being a good enough wife because of this ... and like it pulls us apart...because although it is not the most important thing in the world, it definately brings a closeness to the relationship and we're not getting that closeness on a regular basis.

Has anyone on here experienced this and spoke with thier doctor about it and got any type of solution?

See- for me I think ALOT is the fear of becoming pg again...


EVERYTIME we have an eventful month... I swear I test everyday starting 2 weeks before AF is due... If I could just relax about this... I think alot of other things would fall into place....


As far as the pill goes.... I prob should contact my DR about switching to a different form of BC or atleast a different brand pill! Just havent done it yet.... because of the whole fear thing...

Honestly- if it hasn't been an ogoing things for a long period of time... i would try to give it a little time to work itself out before reading too much into it, or getting down on yourself about it.

Though i dont have any children, but can see what you're saying about hormones, etc... you also have to take into account Everything that you have on your plate right now. a baby, work, School, normal everyday errands, trying to keep up a house, etc.... and that doesnt even include all of the other things that always seem to 'come up' that require even more of your time. Your body might just be Tired. and thats normal. as long as it hasnt been weeks or months since you've been intimate, its not a huge problem. i mean, Yes, its something to stay conscious of (to not make sex the thing that Always gets put on the backburner)... but dotn let it bring you down either

My son is now 28 months and I still have no desire!

I was like this for a while....Till FINALLY dh told me how much it hurt him and really explained to me how much he loves me, would love me if I was 500 lbs and balding and how excited he gets aroudn me...It put the aprak back in our life ten fold....I also finally opened up to him about why I wasnt in the mood...It worked for us.

Dont be embarrassed ...it happens !

It's been 11 months and I still have NO desire.

WOW!

I could have written this letter! My baby is 5 months and I would be happy to never have sex again in my entire life! This used to never be a problem, same as with you, we went at it like jackrabbits all the time, waited like 2 weeks after baby came to have sex again, etc. This is my third and I didn't have this problem with the first two.

For me, I think it has a lot to do with our personal situation. I am very unhappy with my SO right now, we are having financial problems and sometimes I just don't even want him to come home from work! I also just went on the depo shot and found out I am anemic, so that may be contributing to the problem.

Don't know if any of these situations are the same, but I hope it helps to know you aren't alone, and there are a myriad of reasons why this could be happening.

Lyssa