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Mad Women: Why You Turn On Your Husband After The Baby Arrives

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By Mia Bolaris-Forget

Two people totally in love usually leads to the surprise or decision of having a baby...and that news usually affirms and reconfirms the couples love. Ironically however, once your bundle of joy there is often much "joy" robbed from the relationship. In fact, it's not uncommon for mom to have an unexplainable dislike and distaste for dad. In fact, everything about him actually agitates and annoys you and you can hardly believe he's the other half of the reason for your precious little blessing and gift.

So what happened between that amazing night of passion and now? Well, according to experts specializing in postpartum depression, the newfound responsibilities of motherhood, including serious sleep deprivation put ladies on a serious emotional rollercoaster and can lead to some unexplained and irrational outbursts of moodiness and crankiness. And, they add that it's easier to lash out at another adult, usually the man in your life, rather than at a child or infant.

So, what's causing these erratic emotions. Well, this time it may not just be hormones. In fact, most women find they are moody because of the challenges of motherhood and their expectations of the situation and themselves. Perhaps mom over-glorified mommyhood, or perhaps she's finding it difficult to cope or deal but feels she should be able to. It's at this point that the anguish and "breakdown" begins.

This, then becomes a good point to analyze yourself and the situation and to investigate exactly what is making you moody and cranky and whether or not is really has anything to do with your mate at all. Professionals point out, that if everything except for the addition of your new addition, remains the same, including the dynamics of your mate and your relationship then your outbursts, especially against your other half may be due to what's going on physiologically and hormonally.

Here are some areas to examine.

* Sleep deprivation. The midnight feedings and fewer hours of zzzzs can take its toll, especially when compounded by the added concern and worry about your little one can take its toll. A clear mind and a clear attitude require enough rest and a good night's sleep. Experts suggest having someone else take care of your little one while you catch up on some rest.

* Dehydration: A lack of water can not only lead to irritability but also to anxiety. Drinking plenty of water is especially important if you are breastfeeding. In fact breastfeeding moms need to make sure they get their daily eight cups of water every day. It's best to keep a glass of H2O close at hand and sip it as baby nurses.

*Hunger pains: Taking care of what you eat and how much should remain a top priority especially in making sure you take in enough protein and calcium. And, while you may want to drop that extra baby weight you don't want to leave yourself feeling deprived...because that too can lead to a bad mood. Instead make sure you're getting plenty of in-between healthy snack like fruits and veggies with a glass or two of milk.

*Running out of time: Baby may be taking up all your time and energy and you may be feeling a bit deprived. In fact you may be feeling like YOU'RE missing out on life. Try to squeeze in some "me time" just for you to indulge your senses and participate in some of the things that you use to do and that you can look forward to.

* Develop a one step at a time philosophy: Mood swings can strike anywhere, anytime, and for any reason. Learn when to back off and when to take a breather before it gets out of control. If you have to walk away...walk away...just let your spouse know what you are doing. Also let him know what you are thinking, going through and how you are feeling. Keeping an open line of communication is key to both of you getting through this...together and as a unified front. Keeping him in the loop will also prevent you from blowing up at him for not understanding (what you're going through).

* Cause for concern: If you notice that your mood persists for more than a few weeks its best to consult your doctor. Women with a simple case of the baby blues see symptoms that clear up after a few weeks...but ladies with serious postpartum depression tend to experience and suffer from more severe mood swings and extreme sadness for a much longer period of time. The sooner you speak to someone and seek help the better.

Long Island Relationship Articles > Mad Women: Why You Turn On Your Husband After The Baby Arrives

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