Blue Collar Brides: The Modern Day Odd Couple
Save to notebook
By Mia Bolaris-Forget
When we think of the term “odd couple”, some of us think of Jack Klugman and Tony Randall. And some of us may think of our current living situation with a mate who is not quite as tidy as us. Then there was the concept of older men and younger women and recently the reverse of older women with (much) younger men.
Well, the newest among the “odd” couples according to statistics is the well-educated, upwardly mobile, and often successful career women with the “Regular Joe”.
In fact, according to research, both men and women are more comfortable with the increasingly common but previously “unusual” union. And, some experts suggest that since women are continuing to gain individuality, and an ability to pursue their own dreams and depend (for the most part), when it comes to love and romance, they are more often than not, freer (than perhaps before) to follow their hearts (and their head) when it comes to worthwhile and everlasting relationships.
On the flip side, dating someone who is significantly different from you can be challenging note experts. And, they take a closer look at the dynamics of these increasingly successful unions.
Bye Bye Mr. Debonair: According to experts guys with the perceived persona of Mr. Pitt, are nice to look at and even sport on your arm (when out in public) but, for many ladies, NOT necessarily the type of man you want to share or spend your life with. The 80s are over and so are many of the ideas that permeated that generation, including the appeal of the “Alpha-male”. Sure, having a guy who can take charge in great, but one whose personality, schedule and climb to success may conflict and clash with yours is not. And, these, according to experts, are just some of the issues “professional” couples face. They add, that many women may feel or be made to feel “uncomfortable” by Mr. BMW, like they can’t really ever be themselves, and always having to live up to certain expectations for fear of “being replaced”. And, many may simply never feel “good enough”. With blue collar guys, they note that some of the pressure may be lifted. They in fact, feel validated enough and not like they have to always compete for “bigger and better”, which is often, experts say, the case among many professionals.
Experts add that the different career paths may also enhance the relationship with each actually admiring the differences between them and their different strengths, rather than the couple feeling like each party is competing to keep up with and “impress” the other. In fact, they add, such circumstances may for a very difficult and uncomfortable union; and for that reason “odd couples” are frequently both more successful and happier in their lives and marriages.
They go on to add that this “unique” unions will only work if the couple truly respects the other person and disregards preconceived notions or ideas about their mate. For instance if ladies continue to feel that their blue-collar guy is “uneducated”, “uncouth”, “unsophisticated or unrefined” and will never be able to (help) support the household and family and give them the life they’ve always dreamed of and perhaps feel they deserve; or if ambitious women feel they will only be seen as cold-hearted, manipulative, career-obsessed professionals with little time for anyone but themselves and who will do whatever it takes to climb the corporate ladder, the union will never work. Like in any good relationship, understanding, respect, and acceptance (or yourself and your mate) is the key.
And, experts note, that the common thread for many “modern” brides is that they look past the “profession” and deeper into other more “important” similarities that not only make these relationships work, but make them preferable. They note that when all is said and done, it’s the couple’s traditions, chemistry, work ethic, family values, shared experienced and willingness to strive toward the same goals (though sometimes in different ways) that make them compatible. And, more and more women are comfortable with their role in society, the workforce and in their relationship, realizing that love has little to do with your lot in life or what your man does for a living…and that even blue- collar guys make a “nice living. Plus, they realize that “despite” his profession and some differences variety can truly be the spice of (married) life and satisfying ever-lasting liaisons.
Long Island Relationship Articles
Blue Collar Brides: The Modern Day Odd Couple