At work, leave the loner in you outside the door

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If you'd rather work alone than be part of a team, or if new situations with co-workers leave you feeling uncomfortable, you could be suffering from a social inhibition or two.

Some people who are viewed as capable and attractive limit their potential on the job because they can't believe that others view them favorably. That can result in becoming anxious when a supervisor explains a new project or a desire to work alone.

Psychologists call it an avoidant personality disorder. Those who have it may feel they are not welcome to be a part of a group when they actually are. They might be sociable somewhere else, but not where they are now.

Meditation counselor Kathy Feston says people tend to give their energy to what they fear instead of what they hope for. Writing in Prevention, she says meditation helps you focus on what is positive. You become healthier and start interacting with people.

Studies show that meditation defuses negative emotions and teaches fast recovery from negative reactions. Some tips on how to do it:

*Find a private place and sit or lie down with your eyes closed. Start with three minutes of meditation and gradually work up to 20 minutes a day or more.

*Add something spiritual. It could be a candle, a cross, a coin, or anything that reminds you of why you are there.

*Repeat a spiritual mantra. Feston's example: "For me, it's about serenity and creativity," then think of the universe or the presence of the divine.

*Recognize thoughts or feelings that come up. They are real to you.

*Surrender. Relax. Dispense with frustration and negative emotions. Surrender to the idea that miracles can happen says Feston.

Long Island Development Articles > At work, leave the loner in you outside the door